Twisted sick jokes that`ll send us ALL to hell. - Page 148

MaxJoker · August 20th, 2018, 12:49 PM

My wife came into the lounge and asked why our two year old son was howling ,

"He kicked me in the balls" I snarled ,

"It's not his fault" she said "he doesn't understand that it hurts" ,

"He fucking does now" I replied.

Have a great solution to cut the crime rate,

Just make it illegal to be born black.

What did George Michael say to Aretha Franklin a few days ago ? ,

"I Knew You Were Waiting Knew You Waiting For Meeeee ,

To Go First".

Estreeter · August 22nd, 2018, 10:19 AM

Saw my Mum today

She was a little down in the dumps

Granted she is 96 years old but she was complaining about how She and Dad worked their whole lives, paid their taxes, but she is still on the waiting list for surgery after 6 months

I looked at Mum straight in the face and asked her

"Mum you're 96, do you really need bigger breasts ?"

Sorry

**trailmaster** · August 22nd, 2018, 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Estreeter

Saw my Mum today

She was a little down in the dumps

Granted she is 96 years old but she was complaining about how She and Dad worked their whole lives, paid their taxes, but she is still on the waiting list for surgery after 6 months

I looked at Mum straight in the face and asked her

"Mum you're 96, do you really need bigger breasts ?"

Sorry

Not twisted enough. MaxJoker should have it moved to the corny joke thread, but since you're a supermod too he won't and just have to cry about not having more power!

Estreeter · August 22nd, 2018, 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trailmaster

Not twisted enough. MaxJoker should have it moved to the corny joke thread, but since you're a supermod too he won't and just have to cry about not having more power!

But I aimed to please and now feel inferior

a failure

I must make amends

Here , enjoy my joke now

**trailmaster** · August 22nd, 2018, 01:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Estreeter

But I aimed to please and now feel inferior

a failure

I must make amends

Here , enjoy my joke now

Did you get this photo from the Wank Club? There's a lot of weird dudes on that thread

Estreeter · August 23rd, 2018, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trailmaster

Did you get this photo from the Wank Club?

You mean you don't recognise that photo as yourself

MaxJoker · August 28th, 2018, 03:13 PM

What’s the difference between a ton of coal and a thousand Jews ? ,

Jews burn longer.

**fatrat1** · August 28th, 2018, 05:57 PM

How do you get a 100 Jews in a mini?

A: 1 in the drivers seat & 99 in the ashtray.

Estreeter · August 29th, 2018, 12:21 PM

This bloke comes home real pissed one night and so he doesn't get into too much trouble he decides to orally satisfy his Missus. He goes under the covers and does the deed, just. Afterwards, he decides to wash the unpleasant taste from his mouth and goes to the bathroom. Sitting on the dunny seat is his Missus. "How the Fuck did you beat me to the bathroom?" He asks in confusion.

"Quiet!" She replied "Quiet, you'll wake our daughter. She had a nightmare!"

MaxJoker · August 29th, 2018, 04:29 PM

Why does pork taste so great ? ,

Because from Sty to Plate ,

No Muslim touches and contaminates it Mate.

August 20th, 2018, 12:49 PM	#1471
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,580 Times in 69,067 Posts	My wife came into the lounge and asked why our two year old son was howling , "He kicked me in the balls" I snarled , "It's not his fault" she said "he doesn't understand that it hurts" , "He fucking does now" I replied. Have a great solution to cut the crime rate, Just make it illegal to be born black. What did George Michael say to Aretha Franklin a few days ago ? , "I Knew You Were Waiting Knew You Waiting For Meeeee , To Go First". __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

August 22nd, 2018, 10:19 AM	#1472
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,145 Thanks: 449,888 Thanked 896,998 Times in 60,347 Posts	Is this the worst one yet Saw my Mum today She was a little down in the dumps Granted she is 96 years old but she was complaining about how She and Dad worked their whole lives, paid their taxes, but she is still on the waiting list for surgery after 6 months I looked at Mum straight in the face and asked her "Mum you're 96, do you really need bigger breasts ?" Sorry __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

August 28th, 2018, 03:13 PM	#1477
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,580 Times in 69,067 Posts	What’s the difference between a ton of coal and a thousand Jews ? , Jews burn longer. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

August 28th, 2018, 05:57 PM	#1478
fatrat1 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2016 Posts: 2,708 Thanks: 52,479 Thanked 27,279 Times in 2,641 Posts	How do you get a 100 Jews in a mini? A: 1 in the drivers seat & 99 in the ashtray. __________________ My Avatar is To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

August 29th, 2018, 12:21 PM	#1479
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,145 Thanks: 449,888 Thanked 896,998 Times in 60,347 Posts	This bloke comes home real pissed one night and so he doesn't get into too much trouble he decides to orally satisfy his Missus. He goes under the covers and does the deed, just. Afterwards, he decides to wash the unpleasant taste from his mouth and goes to the bathroom. Sitting on the dunny seat is his Missus. "How the Fuck did you beat me to the bathroom?" He asks in confusion. "Quiet!" She replied "Quiet, you'll wake our daughter. She had a nightmare!" __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

August 29th, 2018, 04:29 PM	#1480
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,580 Times in 69,067 Posts	Hey , don't shoot the Why does pork taste so great ? , Because from Sty to Plate , No Muslim touches and contaminates it Mate. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.