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December 3rd, 2017, 09:16 PM | #3521 |
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Granted. But all that pixelation ruins your eyesight.
I wish I'd been a Hollywood megastar during the thirties and forties. |
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December 4th, 2017, 02:39 PM | #3522 |
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Granted. You're as big as Gable, Bogart, Cagney and all the rest. On December 8, 1941 you're first in line to volunteer to join the service and join the Army. Unfortunately, you and half of you platoon are killed in a tragic training camp accident.
I wish for a weekend of passion with my favorite pornstar with both of us at the peak of our looks and sexual abilities.
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December 4th, 2017, 03:39 PM | #3523 |
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Granted, you and John Holmes are loved up for 72 hours. Then unable to hold a shit in for the next 288 hours!
I wish I could swim, like Dolphins can swim.
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December 4th, 2017, 08:58 PM | #3524 |
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Wish granted. You slowly turn into a dolphin. Loses the ability to communicate with your fellow human being. But you are happy. Dumb..but happy.
I wish there would be more female streakers in sports? |
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December 5th, 2017, 06:23 AM | #3525 |
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Wish Granted, a bunch of ladies called The Roly Poly's take up streaking...
https://youtu.be/faen6MlWzFw ...but as they are all at least septuagenarians, they all expire one by one on the turf, and you have to clear them up. I wish I didn't have skeletons in my cupboard, so I could take up Public Office and fix things, without the press "finding" anything.
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December 5th, 2017, 08:22 PM | #3526 |
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Granted. One of bowlinggreen's genies finally gets it right. All your skeletons disappear and you are elected Mayor of London, a meeting with the Queen is scheduled and you are touted as a future PM.
Meanwhile a bored journalist from one of the tabloids is viewing internet porn in the office and comes across your post. Sensing a story he decides to investigate and it turns out that while the genie did make the skeletons in your cupboard disappear, he was too lazy to make them disappear much further than your basement. Great scandal ensues and while you don't get to meet Her Majesty, you do get to spend several years as her guest. I wish to be Grand Exalted Poohbar of the entire internet. |
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December 5th, 2017, 08:25 PM | #3527 |
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WIsh granted. Nobody will get the wind of your previous mistakes but all your new ones fills up the frontpages.
I wish you get to be a Super Mod by entering a Battle Royale style contest |
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December 7th, 2017, 08:50 AM | #3528 |
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Wish granted. loosegoose emerges victorious and decides to continue the tradition by capturing random VEF members and making them battle for custom avatars and tags. You being the original wisher are moved to the top of the roster.
You are killed by trailmaster... trailmaster? who manages to slip under your guard and slice your throat with a broken craft beer bottle. I wish there was really a Trump sex tape and that the Russians would release it tomorrow so that Trump would have to resign and spare us all of the coming madness.
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So much porn, so little time... |
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December 8th, 2017, 07:34 AM | #3529 |
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Wish granted, there is a tape and it is released, but Trump claims it is fake. You are chosen to examine the evidence and have to watch it and all other film of Trump over and over again. The sight of him having sex over and over again drives you mad. You agree it is fake, spend the rest of your days avoiding nudity, and Trump remains President (unfortunately)
I wish that the USA could find a credible Republican Candidate for the next election.
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December 9th, 2017, 07:47 AM | #3530 |
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Wish granted, but he dies a month after taking office, and Roy Moore was VP. Three years later, you find yourself celebrating a compulsory Jesus Day, and worrying about having all the holes on your church attendance ticket punched in case the Morals Police check it. Porn is long gone from the scene. The last time you saw any was on TV, when the trial judge held up a playboy magazine at the trial of an accused pornophile and you caught a brief tantalizing glimpse of the cover. The pornophile was later burned at the stake.
I wish to discover a sunken treasure wreck that has 100 million dollars worth of gold and jewels in it.
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So much porn, so little time... |
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