Post your corny jokes - Page 1276

**gedly** · October 8th, 2017, 11:21 PM

A man walks into a brothel dressed in a policeman's uniform and holding a bag. He says, "Who wants to play cops and robbers with me?"
Next night he walks into the brothel with a doctor's coat, stethoscope and bag and says, "Who wants to play doctors and nurses with me?"
Next night he walks into the brothel in a pilot's uniform with the bag and says, "Who wants to play pilot and air hostesses with me?"
Next night he walks into the brothel in a fireman's uniform and says, "Fire! Fire! Everybody out!" His favourite prostitute pulls out his cock and starts giving him a blowjob. He says, "You better make this quick sweetie. I really am a fireman and this building really is on fire".

**bp666** · October 11th, 2017, 01:02 AM

"One man's trash is another man's treasure" is a great phrase.

However, I discovered it's a shit way to tell the kids they're adopted.

**bp666** · October 11th, 2017, 01:07 AM

Top story of the day:

Convicted hitman Jimmy "Two Shoes" McClardy confessed today that he was once hired to beat a cow to death in a rice field using only two small porcelain figures.

Police have confirmed this may be the first known case of knick-knack paddy whack.

**mrfixit** · October 12th, 2017, 03:06 AM

**mrfixit** · October 12th, 2017, 04:43 PM

Welcome to the Hokey Pokey Mental Health Center

Come in and turn yourself around

**rondori** · October 13th, 2017, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bp666

Top story of the day:

Convicted hitman Jimmy "Two Shoes" McClardy confessed today that he was once hired to beat a cow to death in a rice field using only two small porcelain figures.

Police have confirmed this may be the first known case of knick-knack paddy whack.

The way I originally heard the joke was a S.A.S operative and a I.R.A. terrorist. But times change.

But now for something completely different.

**ball7** · October 13th, 2017, 06:29 PM

Richard is a dick.

**gedly** · October 15th, 2017, 04:22 PM

I know people think that my girlfriend is just a trophy girlfriend but you try fitting her in my living room cabinet.

**Mal Hombre** · October 15th, 2017, 04:40 PM

I know people think that my girlfriend is just a trophy girlfriend but She's just got big ears..

**captpike** · October 16th, 2017, 03:24 PM

An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.
The boy asked, "What is this Father?"

The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is"

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blonde stepped out.

The father said quietly to his son....."Go get your mother."

October 12th, 2017, 03:06 AM	#12754
mrfixit Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Elm Street Posts: 9,401 Thanks: 165,774 Thanked 114,812 Times in 9,416 Posts	__________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?

October 12th, 2017, 04:43 PM	#12755
mrfixit Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Elm Street Posts: 9,401 Thanks: 165,774 Thanked 114,812 Times in 9,416 Posts	Welcome to the Hokey Pokey Mental Health Center Come in and turn yourself around __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?

October 15th, 2017, 04:40 PM	#12759
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,134 Thanks: 772,635 Thanked 855,689 Times in 57,565 Posts	I know people think that my girlfriend is just a trophy girlfriend but She's just got big ears.. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 16th, 2017, 03:24 PM	#12760
captpike Vintage Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: TALOS IV or South Carolina Posts: 1,175 Thanks: 80,321 Thanked 47,306 Times in 1,164 Posts	An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, "What is this Father?" The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is" While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blonde stepped out. The father said quietly to his son....."Go get your mother." __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Looking for more of or about her? Due to recent changes I will be limited on my reups lost most of my collection To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

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October 8th, 2017, 11:21 PM	#12751
gedly Veteran Member Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 3,234 Thanks: 19,879 Thanked 69,307 Times in 3,171 Posts	A man walks into a brothel dressed in a policeman's uniform and holding a bag. He says, "Who wants to play cops and robbers with me?" Next night he walks into the brothel with a doctor's coat, stethoscope and bag and says, "Who wants to play doctors and nurses with me?" Next night he walks into the brothel in a pilot's uniform with the bag and says, "Who wants to play pilot and air hostesses with me?" Next night he walks into the brothel in a fireman's uniform and says, "Fire! Fire! Everybody out!" His favourite prostitute pulls out his cock and starts giving him a blowjob. He says, "You better make this quick sweetie. I really am a fireman and this building really is on fire".

October 11th, 2017, 01:02 AM	#12752
bp666 Vintage Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 1,073 Thanks: 77,520 Thanked 14,183 Times in 1,074 Posts	"One man's trash is another man's treasure" is a great phrase. However, I discovered it's a shit way to tell the kids they're adopted.

October 11th, 2017, 01:07 AM	#12753
bp666 Vintage Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 1,073 Thanks: 77,520 Thanked 14,183 Times in 1,074 Posts	Top story of the day: Convicted hitman Jimmy "Two Shoes" McClardy confessed today that he was once hired to beat a cow to death in a rice field using only two small porcelain figures. Police have confirmed this may be the first known case of knick-knack paddy whack.

October 13th, 2017, 06:29 PM	#12757
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,982 Times in 15,730 Posts	Richard is a dick.

October 15th, 2017, 04:22 PM	#12758
gedly Veteran Member Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 3,234 Thanks: 19,879 Thanked 69,307 Times in 3,171 Posts	I know people think that my girlfriend is just a trophy girlfriend but you try fitting her in my living room cabinet.