Stupid movie cliches and impossibilities

[Giacson]

"Vertical Limit" with Chris O'Donnel was the first movie that came to mind for this topic. One of the rankest pieces of big budget Hollywood garbage ever created. Painfully predictabe, totally unbelievable acting (typical O'Donnel) and impossible stunts abound. One critic noted that it was as realistic to mountain climbing/rescue as Spy Kids was to world espionage. Once you get past the annoyance of all the rediculous scenarios stacked on top of each other, you can have a good laugh at its unwavering intension of insulting the veiwers intelligence. This is especialy true at the end where the heroes gaze at each other with creamy smooth, unweathered faces, totaly uneffected by one of the harshest environments known to man.

[bawjaws]

loud explosions in space.....vacuum-no sound
all computers boot up instantly, pages load instantly, beep whenever scrolling for a "match"and have the most incredible grahics ever seen, even though it's just a small laptop and of course everybody can type at dazzeling speeds, yet strangely never use the space bar

[avidfan]

twilight-what a load of sh!te, vampires live in daylight without anything to protect their skin and when the sun shines their skin glitters, virtually all of the vamps are good looking, young and aaaahh so nice-even to us mortals!
yes i know vamps dont exist-but to totally rewrite the way they act and live is just bo11ocks-just dont watch twilight-watch the blade trilogy instead-thats what i keep telling my 10 & 12 year old daughters

[gwminge]

I have had a beef about this for years.....Independence Day
Will smith bumps into the president after traveling to some secret base by accident.
Meanwhile wills girlfriend comes across the presidents wife in the rubble somewhere by accident...

[Berferd]

Indpence Day--Ah, yes--I'm glad you mentioned that. That movie was so ridiculous and cliched I'm ashamed that I went to see it in the theaters. I like Will Smith but still... that movie was moronic (IMHO).

[haldane4]

I think it's long been acknowledged that Hollywood's version of reality has long since departed from the old devices and unities which made drama work. Even the dullest domestic drama now has a superhero coda where the oppressed spouse is psychoanalysed into becoming a world-beater.

And witness films like The War of the Worlds, where the idiot and annoying son turns up alive at the end, despite running to his certain death earlier in the film. Or in M Night Shitehawk's The Happening when the happening stops happening just as it's about to happen to our 'heroes'. We are led to believe they have some superhuman quality because they survived - and if they're survived because they are the stars, then it follows that stars are superheroes.

I'm sure it's all terribly post-modern, but it's also bollocks. Compare and contrast with Scoundrel's noir thread where our heroes are most definitely human and meet their fate on account of their flaws, not their fee.

[guilert53]

>Stupid movie cliches and impossibilities

How about the whole of The Da Vinci Code.

2 examples:

1) Langdon is in a bookshop signing books in front of loads of people. A policeman walks in and shows him a picture of a murder victim, who is stark naked and covered in blood, in front of all the people in the shop. Yeh right.

2) Langdon is in the Louvre with the dead body and loads of police. He pretends to escape, and like headless chickens all the police chase after him in cars, leaving Langdon alone in the Lourve.

Nobody is left to guard the body, almost nobody is left to check if the murderer is still in the building (after all it is huge).

Langdon has about 20 minutes to play around with evidence, stroll around the galleries looking at paintings and finding hidden clues. Yeh right.

At that point I walked out.

I saw it later on TV and the plot is so full of holes it is not true.

And from what I have heard of Angels and Demons it sounds just as stupid.

[slumdog]

Dont know where else to stick it but Ive just seen the dumbest campest eejit who wuz under the illusion its cool to hang out with GRIZZLYS?? He reminds me of that whining leave Brittney alone jerk, I put it here cos the plot was world peace impossible & got him & his girlfriend ripped the fuck to death. True stories CH 4 Grizzly Man. Dont get me wrong Im not being disrespectful but their out in the middle of camp nowhere for our good & theirs, & hell it beat the shit out of daytime TV.

[gmcbee]

Why is it that any time you see someone in theater box seats, they're at stage left, right?

[clonevs]

Anytime there is a sports scene...like a game being played...and this is especially true where the setting is High School:

The P.A. guy is doing "play by play"! NO that doesn't happen. I've been to hundreds of High School football, basketball and baseball games .....and no, never has the P.A. guy done play by play
And another thing....anytime anyone is playing basketball in a movie someone dunks the ball. No, again. I could probably play at my gym for the next month everyday and see less than %5 of everyone who plays dunk the ball.

Hospital scenes: "Dr. Hamilton...Dr. J. Hamilton" is heard alot. It's on the Queensryche album Operation Mindcrime too!

War of the Worlds: someone already pointed out some flaws. Mine--- ok, lights don't work, watch is stopped, phone don't work, cars won't run and street lights out. Amazingly when the city is attacked someone drops a camcorder....which is filming! I'm insulted.