Post your corny jokes - Page 1110

**SanteeFats** · June 18th, 2016, 02:44 PM

A man needed a horse, so he went to a temple and got one. Before he left, the priest told him that it was a special horse. In order to make the horse go, you say, "Thank God," and for it to stop you say, "Amen." So the man left, and a few minutes later he dozed off on his horse. Hours later, he woke up and his horse was racing him towards the edge of a cliff. Just in time, he shouted "Amen!" and the horse stopped a few inches from the edge. "Whew," said the man,

MaxJoker · June 18th, 2016, 05:11 PM

Not all maths puns are bad,

Just sum.

IronHerder · June 19th, 2016, 05:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaxJoker

Not all maths puns are bad,

Just sum.

I thought that maths puns were the product of a divided mind.

**gmcbee** · June 19th, 2016, 12:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IronHerder

I thought that maths puns were the product of a divided mind.

Wherever they originate, it's clear they multiply. You have to consider all the factors.

Estreeter · June 19th, 2016, 01:10 PM

Why do scuba divers fall backwards off a boat?

Well, if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.

**SanteeFats** · June 19th, 2016, 01:52 PM

Two nuns from Ireland come to tour New York City. Before they come, they hear that Americans eat dogs, so they both agree to try it when they arrive. As they're walking around New York, they hear, "Hot Dogs! Get your hot dogs!" They rush over to get one! As the first nun opens hers, her face turns white and she gasps, "What part did you get?!"

MaxJoker · June 19th, 2016, 06:02 PM

I'm currently writing a self help book called 'Stop Overreacting',

If it doesn't make the bestseller list I swear I`ll kill myself !.

**Mal Hombre** · June 19th, 2016, 06:24 PM

I'm writing one about pessimism but it'll never sell..

IronHerder · June 19th, 2016, 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaxJoker

I'm currently writing a self help book called 'Stop Overreacting',

If it doesn't make the bestseller list I swear I`ll kill myself !.

It's hard for a self-help book to become a best seller because the clerks at the bookstores refuse to assist shoppers in that section of the store -- they think that helping customers would defeat the purpose of those books.

**gmcbee** · June 20th, 2016, 11:18 AM

Someday, I'll get around to writing my book about procrastination.

June 18th, 2016, 05:11 PM	#11092
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,896 Times in 69,067 Posts	Not all maths puns are bad, Just sum. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 19th, 2016, 01:10 PM	#11095
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,189 Thanks: 450,165 Thanked 897,595 Times in 60,391 Posts	Why do scuba divers fall backwards off a boat? Well, if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 19th, 2016, 06:02 PM	#11097
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,896 Times in 69,067 Posts	I'm currently writing a self help book called 'Stop Overreacting', If it doesn't make the bestseller list I swear I`ll kill myself !. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 19th, 2016, 06:24 PM	#11098
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,184 Thanks: 773,251 Thanked 856,399 Times in 57,615 Posts	I'm writing one about pessimism but it'll never sell.. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 18th, 2016, 02:44 PM	#11091
SanteeFats Super Moderator Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: Santee, Ca Posts: 60,915 Thanks: 282,079 Thanked 815,408 Times in 60,963 Posts	A man needed a horse, so he went to a temple and got one. Before he left, the priest told him that it was a special horse. In order to make the horse go, you say, "Thank God," and for it to stop you say, "Amen." So the man left, and a few minutes later he dozed off on his horse. Hours later, he woke up and his horse was racing him towards the edge of a cliff. Just in time, he shouted "Amen!" and the horse stopped a few inches from the edge. "Whew," said the man,

June 19th, 2016, 01:52 PM	#11096
SanteeFats Super Moderator Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: Santee, Ca Posts: 60,915 Thanks: 282,079 Thanked 815,408 Times in 60,963 Posts	Two nuns from Ireland come to tour New York City. Before they come, they hear that Americans eat dogs, so they both agree to try it when they arrive. As they're walking around New York, they hear, "Hot Dogs! Get your hot dogs!" They rush over to get one! As the first nun opens hers, her face turns white and she gasps, "What part did you get?!"

June 20th, 2016, 11:18 AM	#11100
gmcbee Vintage Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Clinging to the rim of a crater on the dark side of Uranus. Posts: 1,065 Thanks: 3,961 Thanked 11,052 Times in 1,042 Posts	Someday, I'll get around to writing my book about procrastination.