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Old 05-17-2008, 08:45 AM   #11
newfan
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unfortunately weasther you want to admit it or not there is a god and a devil , a heaven and a hell the choice to follow god or the devil you make in this life determines your eternal destiny.
god put before you blesing and curing life and death and said choose life-- the choice is yours-- i chose life-- am i perfect no just forgiven and you can be also
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Old 05-17-2008, 10:00 AM   #12
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When someone dies, he/she is sended back to factory. At factory scientists are doing many "important things" to dead and then they are sending them back. This was my theory when I was 5-years old. Obviously it explains the reason to over-population too!
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Old 05-21-2008, 03:23 PM   #13
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hopfully i'll have time for one last tug
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Old 05-21-2008, 05:14 PM   #14
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Rather like that theory where you undergo a review of your past life complete with all the sensations of pain you've caused to other animates. For instance, all those now who loudly proclaim and practice Female Circumcision, and Animals slaughtered without any numbed-senses to glorify an abstract concept really will be in for a fine old time. It would be nice to see the bowel-emptying fear on their faces has they go through it once again with just a couple of million more times to go.
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Old 05-23-2008, 08:42 PM   #15
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When we die... Porn goes on!
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Old 05-24-2008, 10:09 AM   #16
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We go to the lake of fire.


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Old 05-25-2008, 02:29 PM   #17
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I think that the late Dave Allen had a good point; he said that his idea of heaven was drinking a bottle of good malt whiskey and smoking a packet of fags while humping the arse off of some nubile blonde nymphs.
His idea of hell was sitting in a church listening to the preacher droning on about his lifestyle.
So, he said, when he died, he knew where he wanted to go.
I really hope he made it to his idea of heaven.

I do believe that there is something after death.
I had a close shave myself 25 years ago and let’s just say that I think that I was close to moving on to another place.
I know about the scientific explanations for near death experiences however, I don’t know how some guy in a lab can be so arrogant as to say that these experiences were simple chemical responses produced by the brain when these lab boys have not actually experienced them.
I really can’t believe that we go to the place that the organised churches of the world portray but I really think that this life is not the whole thing.
I also know that this contribution will provoke scorn from a lot of you so if you are tempted to tell me that I’m talking nonsense then please save yourself the effort, I know what I experienced.
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Old 05-25-2008, 04:08 PM   #18
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Fair enough, mate! I have an open mind. Could you explain more about your 'near death experience?' I'd be really interested
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Old 06-02-2008, 01:16 PM   #19
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It’s difficult to explain. I really don’t talk about it much because it’s so difficult to put across properly. There was an intensity to the experience that is impossible to convey.

It wasn’t a case of flying onto the roof and looking down on the top of my own head. No tunnels or lights, no dead relatives.
It was much more subtle than that.
I’ve been unconscious on a few occasions (don’t ask, I’m from Glasgow!) and, when it happens, you don’t know much about it.
I did have a dream once when I was knocked out but the point is, I knew that it was a only a dream.
The only thing you usually know when you have been knocked out is when you come too.

On this occasion, I made it to hospital where I collapsed. I had been bleeding internally and that evening the floodgates burst and down I went like a stone while I was in the hospital.
I was whisked into surgery and spent two weeks in the Intensive Care Unit.

The best way that I can think to describe what happened this time, is that I came too while I was still unconscious!
I was thinking with total clarity, as clearly as I ever have.
This was the most intense sensation of clarity that I have ever had.
It wasn’t a dream state or even semi-consciousness.
You see, I “woke up” while I was still out for the count.

I clearly remember it as if I was in a completely dark room and I thought to myself “What happened there?” I retraced my thoughts through entering the hospital, seeing the various doctors, etc, etc, right up to the moments before I collapsed.
I should mention that, at this point, I hadn’t realised that I had actually collapsed!
I only became aware of these events at a later time.
I then thought “so where am I now?” and tried to work out what had happened to me.
I felt that I was in a room of some sort that I should leave at my own speed.
I started “exploring” for an exit and somehow knew that I should proceed in a certain direction.
Again, the best way that I can describe it is that I felt that I was being guided in the direction that I took.
An additional strange item was that, although I was moving, I obviously couldn’t walk and had no sensation of needing to, I simply progressed along. I knew by now that there was something very strange happening but I still couldn’t figure out quite what had happened.

I then recovered consciousness but I was in a more confused state than I had been when I was out of the game!
A doctor told me that I had “given everyone a fright” and that they had very nearly “lost” me.
I didn’t want to make an arse of myself, so I didn’t mention what I had experienced and, as I said at the top, it doesn’t tick any of the flying, or lights in a tunnel clichés.
All I can tell you is, take it from me, whatever you want to call it, my consciousness, my personality, my soul, was not lying on that operating table.
I was told by the doctors that if I hadn’t made it to the hospital under my own steam, then I would not have survived the ambulance journey.

The very intense nature of the experience made the most lingering impression. It sound bonkers to say it but, I have never been so alive.
All very strange and, no, I’m not a religious nut case. I don’t care what or who you believe in, all I’m doing is telling the tale since I was asked.
Regards,
D
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Old 06-08-2008, 04:37 PM   #20
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interesting. I'm not religious in the least. I believe in fate and circumstance. Anything else is just coincidence. That is what I believe. And although it would never stand up in court, it will do for now.
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