Did your mum find your porn mags? - Page 13

onehanded · September 29th, 2009, 02:24 PM

Oh Christ yes... Me and a couple of mates went away for a week in August 1986. I phoned home towards the end of the week to let Ma n Pa know we were OK etc, and Mum tells me that while I was away they'd decorated my room. No mention of the stash under my bed, which included quite a selection (for a 16 year old) of Lovebirds, Playbirds and Rustlers among the 'easier' Razzles and Escorts etc. They MUST have moved the bed to do the skirting boards etc, and there is NO WAY they could have missed the mags. Best of all, they even put them back after they'd finished!!! But to this day, Mum has never mentioned them...

play8er · November 10th, 2009, 08:35 PM

My mum never find my stash when I was younger. But she had always suspected.

Anyway years later she said she knew I looked at porn and said she didn't mind. So I told her that I still look at porn nowadays and she is kool about it.
I love my mum!

Lurcio · January 24th, 2010, 08:30 AM

Even though my mum cleared out my stash a few times I did get the better of her on a couple of occasions. I was up in my bedroom feeling bored so I decided to read some porn, as my mum was downstairs I slipped a copy of fiesta inside the latest edition of Air Cadet News, held them up vertically and sat back to enjoy the girls. No sooner had I done this when my mum walked in (how do mums have this porn detecting radar?), anyway I bluffed it out and continued to hold up the seemingly innocuous Air Cadet News as she flitted around the room. Although mum looked at me suspiciously I got away with it.

Another occasion, and this really blew my mind, came shortly after she had busted me for the second time and bollocked me for reading my 'dirty magazines' (the first time she cleared out my stash they simply dissapeared and nothing was said). I was outside in the garden when I noticed the familiar advert for the Raymond Revue bar just visible through the plastic of a bin bag. I swiftly untied the rubbish bag and retrieved a copy of Club! An obvious double standard was being applied in our house, but never mind, I was up by one copy of Club which was a result as far as I was concerned.

spoonfedmonkey · January 24th, 2010, 10:01 AM

My mother STILL swears she found a copy of SCREW magazine along with my stash. Now, the funny thing is that she properly identified where my stash was. However, I've never even seen a copy of SCREW magazine, much less owned one.

So go figure.

Alvin Lucifer · January 24th, 2010, 08:25 PM

Mom found my porn and I knew it. She didn't know I knew it. She also didn't know I found hers! She didn't care about the porn. I was a troubled youth, so I think she was searching my room to make sure I wasn't concealing drugs or booze. I was never into drugs. I had the occasional dimebag, but I she never found my weed, or if she did, she let it be. It wasn't cocaine, heroin, or vodka. Back on page 1 of this thread Goldentaurus2001 posted a similar story to mine. My mom had an asshole boyfriend who thought I was gay. I didn't know Bob thought I was gay until I was thirty and he was long gone. It wouldn't have bothered mom if I was gay, but Bob (who didn't live with us, thank god) was a bigot and a homophobe. My mom went out with the sonofabitch 'cos she had low self-esteem. She was lonely. My parents had been divorced and it was just us in a little apartment.

It started with Bob saying to my mom, "Your son is queer, isn't he?" She insisted I was not. However, I had a punk/goth look and wore an earring (a big deal in the '80s), plus I had posters of Siouxsie, The Smiths, Soft Cell, and Depeche Mode hanging in my room. I also did not have a girlfriend, but not because I didn't want one! So Bob teased, "Yeah, he's definitely a fag!"

"Look," my mom insisted, "he has female pornography in his room. I'll show you!"

I didn't have anything "weird," just a few Hustlers and Clubs, and a couple of vids I'd procured here and there.

I realized she went through my stuff because the cheap VHS comp of lesbian scenes was on the wrong side of the drawer. I resented her for nosing through my room. So I figured if she was going to sneak around my room, I would sneak around her room. I found an unmarked videotape in her bureau. It turned out to be duplicate copy of MY lesbian comp! I knew she did not know how to make copies of videotapes, but I'm sure Bob did, and I bet they watched it together. Eeeew!

Anyway, she doesn't know I knew, and she will go to her grave not knowing!

Alvin Lucifer · January 24th, 2010, 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by billybunter

As i replied I think on this thread a while back, I used to walk a long route home from school because people used to dump porno mags there. Never understood why!? Maybe they were consciously helping teenage boys get their wanking kicks. Many thanks! These days boys have it too easy with the internet. They'll never experience the trauma of reaching for the top shelf picking a mag, then a newspaper to hide it in, and go to the counter were some old bat gives you the "you're a dirty little bastard eye." My Dad had a few stashed, but were not my era. Hardcore was something you heard about and if you were lucky you feasted your eyes on. Now you just surf to countless websites and there it is. I know i'm sounding like an old fart, but the old days were more exciting; when you had completed operation wank mag, nothing in the world could stop you going back to your bedroom and enjoying the magazine

I used to take a shortcut back home climbing the embankment behind the shopping complex. There was little space by the path concealed enough from the road so it was safe for kids to drink and smoke pot. Transients used to encamp there occasionally. One day I noticed what appeared to be magazines in a bag. Against my better judgment, I nicked them. I had a look around to make sure no one was there. I checked the bag. There were a few pornos in there. They were in good shape. High quality paperstock European hardcore stuff. It wasn't the first HC I ever saw, but the first I didn't have to return! I was lucky I didn't get caught. I knew some of the tough kids from the housing project (what you call "council estates" in the UK) across the road used to party there. If it belonged to them and I got nabbed, they would have beaten me to a bloody pulp. I also could have turned around to find four winos staring at me. Ever seen "Deliverance"? So, I took a chance and lucked out.

I didn't even try to buy my own pornos until I was 18, and even then I got dirty looks from clerks who hit me up for ID. I can't blame them for carding me. I did looked under 18 for sure. They could have spared me looking askance and giving me attitude about it.

When I was in college there was a flea market nearby where a comic books vendor also dealt tons and tons of vintage porno mags. I built up a huge collection of H*stlers from the '70s and '80s. I collected most of them. That guy was always happy to see me!

Long story, but I don't have them anymore. I wish I did because at some point I'll have my own scanner and I could have scanned them all and uploaded them here. BTW, the official H*stler site miserable. NOT worth a membership. They only have pictorials going back about 10 years and no "B**ver H*nt, which was my favorite part. Their BH section is just a bunch of generic pseudo-amateur videos.

**billybunter** · January 25th, 2010, 12:43 AM

I didn't hide my stash very well. Under the mattress, bottom drawer pulled out and tucked away, under the carpet. (remember carpet!) my Mum never minded as long as I kept it hidden

Which I suppose makes sense.

froggi3 · January 25th, 2010, 01:22 AM

My Mom knew I had porn, she didn't care, in fact I stole it from my Dad...it was part of being a guy she always said.

pdxdanpdx · January 25th, 2010, 09:13 PM

get their porn in magazine form.

First time: I had a two-page spread torn out of a hustler magazine. It was my first porno and it was gold. I had it hidden in this storage/loft space in the garage. A breaze or something must have caught it and it drifted down to the garage floor. My Mom, who found it, was brainwashed by nutty ultra-feminists, so she went ballistic. When she was finished with me I felt like a pervert/sadist/oppressor/mysoginist.

Second time: I got caught at school with a playboy....Kona Carmac was the centerfold in that issue. I was so embaressed by getting caught at school and then I got the pervert/sadist/oppressor/mysoginist treatment from Mom when I got home.

...17 years on and I treat women with respect. I've never raped, killed, oppressed, either, but I'm still a pervert!

triumph21 · January 28th, 2010, 07:53 PM

LOL, nope someone elses mother found them. Back at grammar school in the early sixties a friend and myself had got a few Harrison Marks Kameras together, very tame really, and we were renting them out. All was going well until a renters mother found them under his pillow and came round to remonstrate with my parents, I can still see her walking up the road

....oh well end of a little business.. I think my father kept them but I never saw them again.

January 25th, 2010, 09:13 PM	#129
pdxdanpdx Junior Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 1 Thanks: 0 Thanked 16 Times in 1 Post	get their porn in magazine form. First time: I had a two-page spread torn out of a hustler magazine. It was my first porno and it was gold. I had it hidden in this storage/loft space in the garage. A breaze or something must have caught it and it drifted down to the garage floor. My Mom, who found it, was brainwashed by nutty ultra-feminists, so she went ballistic. When she was finished with me I felt like a pervert/sadist/oppressor/mysoginist. Second time: I got caught at school with a playboy....Kona Carmac was the centerfold in that issue. I was so embaressed by getting caught at school and then I got the pervert/sadist/oppressor/mysoginist treatment from Mom when I got home. ...17 years on and I treat women with respect. I've never raped, killed, oppressed, either, but I'm still a pervert! Last edited by pdxdanpdx; January 25th, 2010 at 09:14 PM.. Reason: Fucked the first one up

September 29th, 2009, 02:24 PM	#121
onehanded Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 2 Thanks: 269 Thanked 15 Times in 2 Posts	Oh Christ yes... Me and a couple of mates went away for a week in August 1986. I phoned home towards the end of the week to let Ma n Pa know we were OK etc, and Mum tells me that while I was away they'd decorated my room. No mention of the stash under my bed, which included quite a selection (for a 16 year old) of Lovebirds, Playbirds and Rustlers among the 'easier' Razzles and Escorts etc. They MUST have moved the bed to do the skirting boards etc, and there is NO WAY they could have missed the mags. Best of all, they even put them back after they'd finished!!! But to this day, Mum has never mentioned them...

November 10th, 2009, 08:35 PM	#122
play8er Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1 Thanks: 0 Thanked 12 Times in 1 Post	My mum never find my stash when I was younger. But she had always suspected. Anyway years later she said she knew I looked at porn and said she didn't mind. So I told her that I still look at porn nowadays and she is kool about it. I love my mum!

January 24th, 2010, 08:30 AM	#123
Lurcio Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: South central England Posts: 53 Thanks: 3,645 Thanked 575 Times in 47 Posts	Even though my mum cleared out my stash a few times I did get the better of her on a couple of occasions. I was up in my bedroom feeling bored so I decided to read some porn, as my mum was downstairs I slipped a copy of fiesta inside the latest edition of Air Cadet News, held them up vertically and sat back to enjoy the girls. No sooner had I done this when my mum walked in (how do mums have this porn detecting radar?), anyway I bluffed it out and continued to hold up the seemingly innocuous Air Cadet News as she flitted around the room. Although mum looked at me suspiciously I got away with it. Another occasion, and this really blew my mind, came shortly after she had busted me for the second time and bollocked me for reading my 'dirty magazines' (the first time she cleared out my stash they simply dissapeared and nothing was said). I was outside in the garden when I noticed the familiar advert for the Raymond Revue bar just visible through the plastic of a bin bag. I swiftly untied the rubbish bag and retrieved a copy of Club! An obvious double standard was being applied in our house, but never mind, I was up by one copy of Club which was a result as far as I was concerned.

January 24th, 2010, 10:01 AM	#124
spoonfedmonkey Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 186 Thanks: 2,292 Thanked 1,948 Times in 178 Posts	My mother STILL swears she found a copy of SCREW magazine along with my stash. Now, the funny thing is that she properly identified where my stash was. However, I've never even seen a copy of SCREW magazine, much less owned one. So go figure.

January 24th, 2010, 08:25 PM	#125
Alvin Lucifer Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Pioneer Valley, Massachusetts Posts: 373 Thanks: 8,768 Thanked 3,055 Times in 364 Posts	Mom found my porn and I knew it. She didn't know I knew it. She also didn't know I found hers! She didn't care about the porn. I was a troubled youth, so I think she was searching my room to make sure I wasn't concealing drugs or booze. I was never into drugs. I had the occasional dimebag, but I she never found my weed, or if she did, she let it be. It wasn't cocaine, heroin, or vodka. Back on page 1 of this thread Goldentaurus2001 posted a similar story to mine. My mom had an asshole boyfriend who thought I was gay. I didn't know Bob thought I was gay until I was thirty and he was long gone. It wouldn't have bothered mom if I was gay, but Bob (who didn't live with us, thank god) was a bigot and a homophobe. My mom went out with the sonofabitch 'cos she had low self-esteem. She was lonely. My parents had been divorced and it was just us in a little apartment. It started with Bob saying to my mom, "Your son is queer, isn't he?" She insisted I was not. However, I had a punk/goth look and wore an earring (a big deal in the '80s), plus I had posters of Siouxsie, The Smiths, Soft Cell, and Depeche Mode hanging in my room. I also did not have a girlfriend, but not because I didn't want one! So Bob teased, "Yeah, he's definitely a fag!" "Look," my mom insisted, "he has female pornography in his room. I'll show you!" I didn't have anything "weird," just a few Hustlers and Clubs, and a couple of vids I'd procured here and there. I realized she went through my stuff because the cheap VHS comp of lesbian scenes was on the wrong side of the drawer. I resented her for nosing through my room. So I figured if she was going to sneak around my room, I would sneak around her room. I found an unmarked videotape in her bureau. It turned out to be duplicate copy of MY lesbian comp! I knew she did not know how to make copies of videotapes, but I'm sure Bob did, and I bet they watched it together. Eeeew! Anyway, she doesn't know I knew, and she will go to her grave not knowing!

January 25th, 2010, 12:43 AM	#127
billybunter R.I.P. Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Gone But Not Forgotten Posts: 14,404 Thanks: 51,687 Thanked 252,377 Times in 14,171 Posts	I didn't hide my stash very well. Under the mattress, bottom drawer pulled out and tucked away, under the carpet. (remember carpet!) my Mum never minded as long as I kept it hidden Which I suppose makes sense.

January 25th, 2010, 01:22 AM	#128
froggi3 Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 61 Thanks: 228 Thanked 1,505 Times in 49 Posts	My Mom knew I had porn, she didn't care, in fact I stole it from my Dad...it was part of being a guy she always said.

January 28th, 2010, 07:53 PM	#130
triumph21 Junior Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 4 Thanks: 32 Thanked 17 Times in 3 Posts	LOL, nope someone elses mother found them. Back at grammar school in the early sixties a friend and myself had got a few Harrison Marks Kameras together, very tame really, and we were renting them out. All was going well until a renters mother found them under his pillow and came round to remonstrate with my parents, I can still see her walking up the road ....oh well end of a little business.. I think my father kept them but I never saw them again.