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Old 05-17-2013, 12:10 PM   #21
RjG57
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Originally Posted by Estreeter View Post
A good excuse for not wanting sex

I just ate, gotta wait a while
I was thinking more along the lines of......................

'I don't have a paper bag handy'

but thinking of the consequences that would result I thought maybe something else would be more appropriate.
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Old 05-17-2013, 02:00 PM   #22
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Wink Excuses for anything

Shitting your pants when on a first date,

1) I was finding it so interesting listening to your entire life story i was loathe to leave the table and break your train of consciousness.

2) Well you started talking about children and i wanted to see what the baby might look like, if it took after you.

3) Hey i didn`t bring my wallet, so how else do you think i`m going to get the management to demand i leave without paying.
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Old 05-17-2013, 03:38 PM   #23
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Shitting your pants when on a first date,
I know a guy who was cooking dinner for his new girl. He thought it would be funny to cock his leg and fart. He had white jeans on, use your imagination on what happened.
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Old 05-17-2013, 03:56 PM   #24
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Excuse for drink driving

Well, The engine runs on alcohol, So officer, It seems only fair the driver does also



That'll never work
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Old 05-17-2013, 05:16 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by Estreeter View Post
Excuse for drink driving

Well, The engine runs on alcohol, So officer, It seems only fair the driver does also



That'll never work
You are the VEF waste management boss.
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Old 05-18-2013, 12:18 AM   #26
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Default Under-researched excuse

Just finished watching Ted (well, our 11-year old stays up very late). Mark Wahlberg arrives late at the office, after he's been smoking pot with his teddy bear.

Boss: John, it's almost 10:00.

Mark Wahlberg: I know, sir. I'm sorry, it wasn't my fault.

Boss:
What do you mean?

Mark Wahlberg:
Why, I... er... I guess I wasn't really prepared for a follow-up question.
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Old 05-18-2013, 04:58 PM   #27
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Excuse for turning down sex

I can't, I won't, I'm planning on jerking off later, How am I supposed too cum later on



That'll work
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Old 07-03-2016, 12:33 PM   #28
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One common excuse that some kids use when they can't give the teacher their homework assignment is " The dog ate my homework". I was always a good student. I always turned in my assignments. They may not have been that good, but I always turned them in.
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