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August 13th, 2017, 04:55 PM | #12611 |
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To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator? |
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August 13th, 2017, 06:52 PM | #12612 |
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Tom Baker sued Dr. Pepper, for not being a real doctor.
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August 15th, 2017, 02:34 PM | #12613 |
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My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. |
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August 15th, 2017, 06:55 PM | #12614 |
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August 15th, 2017, 08:32 PM | #12615 |
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August 15th, 2017, 09:07 PM | #12616 |
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Man goes to the doctor with earache. The doctor says "I'm afraid you're going to have stop masturbating."
"Really? That's causing my earache?" "No it's upsetting the nurse." |
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August 15th, 2017, 10:39 PM | #12617 |
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I heard a rather funny story about a man who drank a lot and his wife said "If you ever come home drunk again, I'm going to leave you". He went out to a pub and drank a lot and was sick all over his shirt, and said to his friend "If I go home like this my wife will leave me". His friend said "I tell you what, put a twenty-pound note in your inside jacket pocket, go home and show it to her and tell her somebody threw-up over you and he gave you the money for the dry-cleaning bill.".
He goes home and his wife's angry at the state of him and tells him she is leaving but he says "No, no, no, somebody was sick on me and he put a twenty-pound note in my jacket pocket for the dry-cleaning bill". His wife reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out two twenty-pound notes and asks "Why have you got two twenty-pound notes in there?" He replies "Oh the other one is from the man who shat in my pants". |
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August 16th, 2017, 10:15 PM | #12618 |
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I was having a piss at the pub, standing next to me was a midget.
I noticed he was winking at me so I looked away but when I turned around again the little fucker was still winking at me like crazy. I said to him "Do you fuckin' fancy me or something?' He said, "No you're splashing it in my eyes you cunt." |
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August 17th, 2017, 11:06 AM | #12619 |
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At the kleptomania support group meeting, everyone volunteered to take the minutes!
Those who didn't get to take the minutes, took a seat. |
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August 17th, 2017, 11:07 AM | #12620 |
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I went to a fancy dress party last week dressed as a loaf of bread.
The birds were all over me. |
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