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March 23rd, 2017, 02:30 AM | #12081 |
Vintage Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Clinging to the rim of a crater on the dark side of Uranus.
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*peengoon...
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March 25th, 2017, 06:29 PM | #12082 |
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Location: Idaho
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Why did the condom cross the road?
He got pissed off.
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March 25th, 2017, 09:16 PM | #12083 |
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An attractive blonde from Cork , Ireland , arrived at the casino. She seemed a little intoxicated and bet twenty thousand dollars in a single roll of the dice.
She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude." with that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and with an Irish brogue yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed... "Yes! Yes! I won, I won!" She hugged each of the dealers, picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly parted. The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I don't know - I thought you were watching."
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March 26th, 2017, 02:15 PM | #12084 |
Administrator
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This Lady got so mad at her husband she packed his bags and threw them out the front door then told him to get out.
As he walked to the door she yelled, "I hope you die a long, slow, painful death." He turned around and said, "So, does that mean you want me to stay?"
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March 26th, 2017, 04:18 PM | #12085 |
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Should depressed people have euthanasia? Well, it would certainly put them out of their misery.
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March 27th, 2017, 01:55 PM | #12086 |
Senior Member
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I asked a lady friend if she would have sex with me. She replied,"The short answer is no."
Curious, I asked what the long answer was. "Noooooooooooooooo!" |
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March 27th, 2017, 11:39 PM | #12087 |
緑の男
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A penguin's car breaks down and he has it towed to a repair shop.
The mechanic tells him that he should have some information in about an hour. The penguin sees an ice cream shop across the street so he wanders over while the mechanic works. He finds the vanilla is the best ice cream he's ever eaten and he eats it with messy and gluttonous abandon getting it all over his face. He goes back to the mechanic's to check on his car. The mechanic informs him, "It looks as though you've blown a seal." "Oh, no." replies the penguin "It's just some ice cream." |
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March 28th, 2017, 04:06 AM | #12088 |
Vintage Member
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I would have liked that, but it's been done so often.
BZZZZZZT. Sorry. Next. |
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March 28th, 2017, 04:08 AM | #12089 |
Vintage Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Clinging to the rim of a crater on the dark side of Uranus.
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Thanked 11,051 Times in 1,042 Posts
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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and a Mormon?
A basement full of stolen groceries. |
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March 28th, 2017, 02:15 PM | #12090 |
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For people who say,,Nothing Lasts Forever,,,,try wanking to a nude picture of Susan Boyle
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