Women jokes - Page 58

MaxJoker · June 13th, 2018, 03:38 PM

What's that very best thing about a blowjob ? .

The momentary peace and quiet.

MaxJoker · June 22nd, 2018, 05:17 PM

My wife yelled at me today “You’re not even bloody listening, are you ?!? ” ,

“That’s a weird way to start a conversation” I replied .

MaxJoker · June 24th, 2018, 05:14 PM

Recent studies show that 43% of women have used vibrators ,

From this we can only conclude that the other 57% bought theirs new.

**fatrat1** · June 24th, 2018, 06:35 PM

I gave my wife a bunch of flowers yesterday, ungrateful cow said I suppose I have to open my legs for these. I said why, haven't you got a vase.

**fatrat1** · June 24th, 2018, 09:58 PM

True quotes from Sir Winston Churchill:

Viscountess Astor: “If I were your wife I would poison your coffee…”

Sir Winston Churchill: “And if I were your husband, I would drink it”.

It was common knowledge that they both hated each other.

Another one this time Member of Parliament Bessie Braddock.

Bessie Braddock: “Winston, you are drunk, and what’s more you are disgustingly drunk.”

Sir Winston Churchill: “Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly.”

Estreeter · June 25th, 2018, 02:40 PM

Canon and Nikon are working on a camera that has such a fast shutter speed that it could take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut.

MaxJoker · June 27th, 2018, 11:21 AM

Wife said "If anything ever happens to me I want you to find someone new" ,

Turns out "Anything" doesn't include being stuck in traffic .

MaxJoker · June 29th, 2018, 02:01 PM

Wife set up a website to help the victims of domestic violence by talking about her experiences ,

She got 200 hits in the first hour ,

Until my hands began to hurt.

**Mister Fide** · July 1st, 2018, 04:19 AM

The first annual 'Me Too' meeting has been cancelled. The Chairman had insisted that all the women who attended had to wear a mini-skirt and stockings.

MaxJoker · July 1st, 2018, 05:29 AM

Whenever phone my wife on her mobile I speak as quietly as I can ,

The closer she holds it the greater the chance of a tumour developing.

June 13th, 2018, 03:38 PM	#571
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,434 Times in 69,067 Posts	What's that very best thing about a blowjob ? . The momentary peace and quiet. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 22nd, 2018, 05:17 PM	#572
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,434 Times in 69,067 Posts	My wife yelled at me today “You’re not even bloody listening, are you ?!? ” , “That’s a weird way to start a conversation” I replied . __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 24th, 2018, 05:14 PM	#573
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,434 Times in 69,067 Posts	Recent studies show that 43% of women have used vibrators , From this we can only conclude that the other 57% bought theirs new. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 24th, 2018, 06:35 PM	#574
fatrat1 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2016 Posts: 2,707 Thanks: 52,469 Thanked 27,272 Times in 2,640 Posts	I gave my wife a bunch of flowers yesterday, ungrateful cow said I suppose I have to open my legs for these. I said why, haven't you got a vase. __________________ My Avatar is To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 24th, 2018, 09:58 PM	#575
fatrat1 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2016 Posts: 2,707 Thanks: 52,469 Thanked 27,272 Times in 2,640 Posts	True quotes from Sir Winston Churchill: Viscountess Astor: “If I were your wife I would poison your coffee…” Sir Winston Churchill: “And if I were your husband, I would drink it”. It was common knowledge that they both hated each other. Another one this time Member of Parliament Bessie Braddock. Bessie Braddock: “Winston, you are drunk, and what’s more you are disgustingly drunk.” Sir Winston Churchill: “Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly.” __________________ My Avatar is To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 25th, 2018, 02:40 PM	#576
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,091 Thanks: 449,492 Thanked 896,550 Times in 60,293 Posts	Canon and Nikon are working on a camera that has such a fast shutter speed that it could take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 27th, 2018, 11:21 AM	#577
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,434 Times in 69,067 Posts	Wife said "If anything ever happens to me I want you to find someone new" , Turns out "Anything" doesn't include being stuck in traffic . __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 29th, 2018, 02:01 PM	#578
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,434 Times in 69,067 Posts	Wife set up a website to help the victims of domestic violence by talking about her experiences , She got 200 hits in the first hour , Until my hands began to hurt. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

July 1st, 2018, 04:19 AM	#579
Mister Fide Veteran Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: Nearly there Posts: 892 Thanks: 23,075 Thanked 17,986 Times in 890 Posts	The first annual 'Me Too' meeting has been cancelled. The Chairman had insisted that all the women who attended had to wear a mini-skirt and stockings.

July 1st, 2018, 05:29 AM	#580
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,434 Times in 69,067 Posts	Whenever phone my wife on her mobile I speak as quietly as I can , The closer she holds it the greater the chance of a tumour developing. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

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