Post your corny jokes - Page 1399

MaxJoker · October 26th, 2018, 10:13 AM

My neighbour says I have boundary issues ,

Read it in her diary.

**gedly** · October 26th, 2018, 01:44 PM

I should have known it was a bad idea for my 15 year old daughter to go to Pakistan with her best friend. I've told her husband so as well.

MaxJoker · October 26th, 2018, 05:40 PM

Went to the library earlier to ask if they had a book about pantomimes,

Librarian shouted "It's behind you , behind you !".

**gedly** · October 26th, 2018, 09:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaxJoker

Went to the library earlier to ask if they had a book about pantomimes,

Librarian shouted "It's behind you , behind you !".

"Oh no it isn't...…"

MaxJoker · October 27th, 2018, 05:08 PM

Asked my Welsh friend how many sexual partners he'd had ,

Started counting but then fell asleep.

**ball7** · October 27th, 2018, 05:50 PM

In the US of A you lust for the farmer's daughter
In Mexico you lust for the hot senorita
In Wales they lust for the sheep

**Almero** · October 28th, 2018, 11:36 AM

Last night I was reminiscing of when I was young, I spent all of my time playing Xbox, watching porn and masturbating.
A lot has changed since then, I have a PlayStation now.

**trailmaster** · October 28th, 2018, 11:44 AM

I bought a race horse and decided to call it "MY FACE".
Just imagine it running down the home straight with all the women shouting "Come on MY FACE"!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

What has getting your girlfiriend pregnant and locking your keys in the car got in common?

Both problems can be easily fixed with a coat hanger.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Some mornings I wake up bitchy.
Other mornings I let her sleep.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
What's the difference between Frenchmen and toast?
You can make soldiers out of toast.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
What's long and hard and makes women groan?
An ironing board.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Womens Personal Ads Guide(The Real Meanings)

40ish - 49
Adventurous - Slept with everyone
Athletic - no tits
Average looking - Ugly
Beautiful - Pathological liar
Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure - On medication
Feminist - Fat
Free spirit - Junkie

**mrfixit** · October 28th, 2018, 01:44 PM

A lesbian and a gay couple are both heading to the airport what couple makes it there first?

The lesbian couple because the gays are still at home packing their shit.

**mrfixit** · October 28th, 2018, 02:26 PM

October 26th, 2018, 10:13 AM	#13981
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,564 Times in 69,067 Posts	My neighbour says I have boundary issues , Read it in her diary. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 26th, 2018, 05:40 PM	#13983
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,564 Times in 69,067 Posts	Went to the library earlier to ask if they had a book about pantomimes, Librarian shouted "It's behind you , behind you !". __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 27th, 2018, 05:08 PM	#13985
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,564 Times in 69,067 Posts	Asked my Welsh friend how many sexual partners he'd had , Started counting but then fell asleep. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 28th, 2018, 01:44 PM	#13989
mrfixit Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Elm Street Posts: 9,401 Thanks: 165,843 Thanked 114,822 Times in 9,416 Posts	A lesbian and a gay couple are both heading to the airport what couple makes it there first? The lesbian couple because the gays are still at home packing their shit. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?

October 28th, 2018, 02:26 PM	#13990
mrfixit Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Elm Street Posts: 9,401 Thanks: 165,843 Thanked 114,822 Times in 9,416 Posts	__________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?

October 26th, 2018, 01:44 PM	#13982
gedly Veteran Member Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 3,234 Thanks: 19,883 Thanked 69,310 Times in 3,171 Posts	I should have known it was a bad idea for my 15 year old daughter to go to Pakistan with her best friend. I've told her husband so as well.

October 27th, 2018, 05:50 PM	#13986
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,286 Thanked 209,984 Times in 15,730 Posts	In the US of A you lust for the farmer's daughter In Mexico you lust for the hot senorita In Wales they lust for the sheep

October 28th, 2018, 11:36 AM	#13987
Almero Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: From Russia with love Posts: 1,432 Thanks: 13,926 Thanked 25,344 Times in 1,425 Posts	Last night I was reminiscing of when I was young, I spent all of my time playing Xbox, watching porn and masturbating. A lot has changed since then, I have a PlayStation now.

October 28th, 2018, 11:44 AM	#13988
trailmaster Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Chicago, Illinois, USA Posts: 59,897 Thanks: 1,329,020 Thanked 707,223 Times in 60,071 Posts	I bought a race horse and decided to call it "MY FACE". Just imagine it running down the home straight with all the women shouting "Come on MY FACE"!! -------------------------------------------------------------------------- What has getting your girlfiriend pregnant and locking your keys in the car got in common? Both problems can be easily fixed with a coat hanger. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Some mornings I wake up bitchy. Other mornings I let her sleep. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- What's the difference between Frenchmen and toast? You can make soldiers out of toast. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ What's long and hard and makes women groan? An ironing board. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Womens Personal Ads Guide(The Real Meanings) 40ish - 49 Adventurous - Slept with everyone Athletic - no tits Average looking - Ugly Beautiful - Pathological liar Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills Emotionally secure - On medication Feminist - Fat Free spirit - Junkie

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