The Porn Fairy.

[guvn00rr]

VEF members...I can claim the existence of the Porn Fairy!

Today, I swung past the recycling dumpsters near my home. I find it amazing how people can throw out drink containers that they have paid a deposit on. Anyway, I glanced in an adjacent bin and lo and behold...someone had dumped their collection of mid-90s Swank. I feverishly collected 19 of this discovery. Just skimmed through them...some material to work with there!

[seivad]

My earliest gift from the porn fairy was a copy of The Sun around 1977, dumped in the bushes in the field behind our house.

On page 3 was Jane Warner. So despite other gifts over the next year or so, Jane remains my top page 3 girl.

[Schwenck]

I just had to post this. This is from the Third Leader in 'The Times' (UK) today. Leader's are 'The Time's' official opinion, rather than that of one of it's journalists (who have a wide range of opinions), and the Third Leader is often humourous.

The background is that the National Trust's theme for 2019 is protest movements. The Times ponders other things that the NT could profile (shortened):

1) Alcopops
2) Ceefax
3) Porn in Hedges
4) Having to speak to your girl or boyfriend's mum when you rang her.

The text for point 3 is:
Porn in Hedges: Where did it go? Another casualty of the internet age. People miss it. Or I know I do. We could get some printed, and distribute at all our sites of Outstanding Natural Beauty. Big Win!

As a member of the National Trust and member of this site, I hope this is one suggestion they take up. Preferably old UK porn, in plastic bags though, to keep it in pristine condition.

Apologies to readers outside the UK - this is rather a British joke and post. Let me know if you want me to explain any strange references.

Interestingly, there was one time when 'The Times' could have been hedge porn itself. In 1971 'The Times' showed the first naked woman ever to appear in a UK newspaper, Vivian Neves, in an ad for Fisons. It was a full broadsheet page advert. I was in the Sixth Form at school, and read 'The Times' on a reduced student rate and remember it well. I probably cut it out, but have lost it since. 'The Sun' had shown a topless model, but they kept their knickers on. Interestingly, this was well before the 'Dirty Digger' (aka Rupert Murdoch) bought 'The Times'. Vivian did also pose topless for 'The Sun'.

One reader wrote: "I hope this delightful picture has the same effect on The Times’ circulation as it does on mine.”".

Vivian Neves was known as 'The Body' (well before Elle McPherson) and did a lot of modelling, plus some Film & TV work. She was a Penthouse Pet - not sure when. Her daughter Kelly was also a Page 3 girl. Sadly, Vivian developed Multiple Sclerosis, and died quite young, aged 55, in 2002.

Searching the internet, I haven't managed to find a really good image of this, but I have uploaded 3 images. The best one showing the ad has Vivian's nipples covered up, but they were certainly not in the original advert. She posed as in the other two images, which I assume were the original photo used in the ad. These photos are pretty much what you got in mags like Penthouse or Mayfair in 1971.

[muggly]

When I was a teenage lad I realised where the PF would leave her gifts for me and my mates to collect and afterwards to visually devour the contents of such magazine treasures. Popular places included a local gents, where scandalous Tete a tetes had occurred (without our prior knowledge), and a couple of country lanes that encircled the local council estates. Nothing too hardcore was left though, but if it had I think it would have changed our outlook on women and their role in our fantasies. Now I must confess that later in life I became a contributor to the PF's delivery system. I was in Sheffield for a few days and had amassed a selection of strong ( but not too explicit) mags from a local sex shop. On my way back home I decided to discard such mags and hopped over a stone wall to hide the stash under a pile of slate that may have been originally part of a farm building roof. I would be surprised if the PF discovered them, or anyone else for that matter. I thought I might pick them back up on my way back to Sheffield but I forgot to take note of any outstanding features to help me locate the field I put them in. Hope the Porn Fairy finds a good home for them.

[Girlfan]

Originally Posted by muggly

When I was a teenage lad I realised where the PF would leave her gifts for me and my mates to collect and afterwards to visually devour the contents of such magazine treasures. ........ On my way back home I decided to discard such mags and hopped over a stone wall to hide the stash under a pile of slate that may have been originally part of a farm building roof. I would be surprised if the PF discovered them, or anyone else for that matter.

You'd be surprised at how good she is at finding hidden magazines. When I was about 14 or 15 I found a copy of Playbirds. Having only ever seen (very small amounts of) softcore before that, I decided it was too hot to handle, and couldn't risk my parents finding this "hard-core" porn. I dumped the mag between two disused factory buildings, in a little area waist-deep in nettles, and hidden under an old bit of corrugated iron.
About two days later, I had an uncontrollable urge to go back for "just one more look" - but, of course, the Porn Fairy had already visited and redistributed my treasure!

[minky951]

Once on our usual lads bank holiday piss-up in the Lake District, I stumbled upon quite a stash of porn mags inside a stone hut shelter in the middle of nowhere. I'd merely popped inside to take a piss out of the rain. Later I returned in my car and cleared out the hoard, cutting short my weekend break to go home early. So excited I had to stop off on the motorway services for a secluded preview and first of many "free" wanks. Thank you Porn Fairy.

[muggly]

If anyone stops off between Sheffield and Bakewell for a pee, and discovers a stash of magazines under a pile of slates, in a farmers field, then please can you contact me as I think I spent £50 in 1985 so they will be worth a bit more now on the vintage mag market. You might need a large carrier bag for transport. Remuneration for the carrier bag will be paid on delivery of my magazines thanks.

[Jonj8282]

Lol brilliant thread. I recall seeing my first mag left by the PF under a hedge in a nearby park. Unfortunately we were with my mate’s parents so couldn’t properly look but we did make an excuse to run off and have a quick flick and admire the suspender wearing nude women with bushes. In 5th form (16) a mate showed us his stash in a briefcase in some woods behind his house. I should use this forum to apologise to him as I took the bus from mine to his one Sunday, found the stash and whilst wanking unexpectedly splashed on one of his mags. Just so he knows it wasn’t the PF leaving some jism for him

[muggly]

In the 1980s I worked for a 75 year old bachelor who lived on the third floor of the property I worked in. I discovered a hardcore mag containing ' golden showers 'in a bureau in his office and suspected that he might have a few more magazines in his living quarters. When he was visiting his sister in Cumbria I had the chance to seek other magazines and found his stash in a cardboard box at the bottom of his wardrobe. As I had a few hours to peruse the mags I emptied the box onto his bedroom carpet. After about an hour I suddenly realised he had put the mags in some form of chronological order and spent the next hour arranging his mags in a pile that started from 1974 but as I sorted them kept losing track as some years had missing months or he changed from one brand to another then back again part way through the next year. I lost my sexual urges by the time I had reset his stash in what hopefully I think was the correct order. Taught me not to be so curious.

[Schwenck]

The comment on this tweet was:
"Rarely seen Wildlife is returning to the city. Nature is healing"




Good to see the return of Hedge Porn!
Shame I cannot go out and hunt for it.