The corrupt a wish game

[MaxJoker]

Originally Posted by scoundrel

I wish I could a afford someone to clean up my slovenly flat for me.

Granted.

You now have enough money to pay someone to clean your flat. Because you fell down the stairs and broke every bone in your body , so are saving money hand over fist on having to buy food due to being in hospital getting fed through a straw.


I wish i was 15 years younger in body but not mind.

[Lurk_D]

Granted. You get excited, run around for awhile, and die of a stroke.

I wish I could think of other things.

[maildude]

Originally Posted by Lurk_D

I wish I could think of other things.

Granted. You just thought of rotten apples. And pig shit. And overdue bills. And Syphilis. And Roseanne Barr. And erectile disfunction. And......

I wish Bigfoot would stop stealing my newspaper.

[sweatyhat]

Originally Posted by maildude

I wish Bigfoot would stop stealing my newspaper.

Granted.
Without anything to wipe with, Bigfoot has a dirty arse and leaves skidmarks wherever he sits in your house.

I wish I had a photograph of Bigfoot.

[Estreeter]

Originally Posted by sweatyhat

Granted.
Without anything to wipe with, Bigfoot has a dirty arse and leaves skidmarks wherever he sits in your house.

I wish I had a photograph of Bigfoot.

Granted, but Bigfoot knows ya took it and he's huntin' for ya

I wish I had a Jeanie, just like that idiot Major Nelson had,

[MaxJoker]

Originally Posted by Estreeter

I wish I had a Jeanie, just like that idiot Major Nelson had,

Granted.

You now have 90 year old Korean war veteran Major Leroy Nelson`s wife Jeanie, and boy was he glad to get rid of her.

I just hope you enjoy the smell of over cooked cabbage and over filled catheters.



I wish i could control the minds of others.

[Jeff Vader]

Originally Posted by GreenSkull

Granted.

You now have 90 year old Korean war veteran Major Leroy Nelson`s wife Jeanie, and boy was he glad to get rid of her.

I just hope you enjoy the smell of over cooked cabbage and over filled catheters.



I wish i could control the minds of others.

Granted. However you can only control the mind of a small dog, and in a bizarre accident involving a lawnmower your minds are exchanged. Before you can get back into your own head the dog tries to lick his/your own balls and snaps his/your spine in doing so.

It hurts a lot too.

I wish I could pick up a language in a few weeks and not the months it's taking.

[sweatyhat]

Originally Posted by Jeff Vader

I wish I could pick up a language in a few weeks and not the months it's taking.

Granted.
After just a few hours of hard drinking, you're speaking like a native.
Aaarrggh! Fuggit! You're my besht mate you are

I wish telephones were never invented.

[HugoHackenbush]

Originally Posted by sweatyhat

Granted.
After just a few hours of hard drinking, you're speaking like a native.
Aaarrggh! Fuggit! You're my besht mate you are

I wish telephones were never invented.

Granted.
No Telephones, ergo
No telephone lines, ergo
Nothing to plug your computer into, ergo
No way to download porn, ergo,
You entire porn collection disappears, ergo
There's no way to tell that the girls in your section of the country are quite plain, and in some cases downright ugly, and don't shag well.

I wish for a new Monty Python movie.

[Jeff Vader]

Originally Posted by HugoHackenbush

I wish for a new Monty Python movie.

Granted. However it's made by the same people who made Turkish Star Wars
http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...07816427160377

It is a rehash of The Life of Brian (dubbed in Turkish) with bits of Planet of the Apes - also in Turkish but starring Keanu Reeves as a tree, Flashdance (dubbed in Swahili) and The Seventh Seal with the dialogue in English, but the script is just random quotes from Danny Dyer movies 'leave it'; 'Oi'; 'nuffink'; 'wankaaaaa'.

I wish to see said movie made and win all the Oscars next year just to prove how utterly meaningless they are.