The Late Late Late Well Out Of Date News Flash Thread !

[billybunter]

"Gee Mags you have me as hard as a rock" "Oh Ronnie dear take me. Take me anyway you want" "Don't worry I'll get our boys to take care of Nancy and Dennis"

[MaxJoker]

Originally Posted by billybunter

"Gee Mags you have me as hard as a rock" "Oh Ronnie dear take me. Take me anyway you want" "Don't worry I'll get our boys to take care of Nancy and Dennis"

Way too sick a mental picture to thank - Insert ill smiley -






Sylvester McCoy named as latest Dr Who

Claims to be very excited about the new darker direction the series will be heading , and that he intends to be a much more believable time lord. So will in no way behave like an annoying gobshite begging for a swift kneeing in the knackers .



Can`t wait

[P37]

Aparently we are to join a thing called the Common Market. This is to bring us stability and growth by joining with our European friends and neighbours. There is no suggestion of a single currency but it will produce a stable ecconomic platform for centuries to come enabling us and the rest of europe to ride out any future turmoil in the world financial markets.

So in short no more "Great Depression" or Wall Street crashes for us. Hoorah!

[squigg58]

Congratulations to Richard and Kathy Hilton on the birth of their first child; a daughter.

With all that money in the family, I bet she's grows up to be one smart, classy lady!

[P37]

I have just had some idiot knock on my door trying to get me to invest in his new company. Said his name was Gates or some such and for £500 I can have half his new venture something called Microsoft.

Ha! I don't think so, told him to go away and get a propper job, something stable like working in a bank or respectable like becoming an MP.
Bloody time wasters

[MaxJoker]

Jerusalem chronicle reports about the son of a carpenter who wowed a crowd of thousands earlier this afternoon with an open air cooking demonstration involving fish and bread. Some have said such cooking displays for the general public might catch on ,but i can`t see it happening. In fact i`ll suck on a sponge full of vinegar if i`m proven wrong !.

[rotobott]

I've just heard a guy is going to start a forum for classic porn.

Get with the times man, no one wants to see normal looking people with hair having sex. Shaved, steroids and spitting are what we want.

And best of all a guy jacking off for ten minutes at the end of every scene.

[P37]

Give me strength, there was another chancer at the door wants me to invest in his fruit and veg stall, Apple he called it said his name was Jobs Well I can tell you I put him straight about jobs and no mistake.

Told him I was busy watching tomorrows world and that my money was going into kodak and hovver cars like all the smart people, must say that the Delorien certainly seems to have a future!

[P37]

At last ,a visitor who was on the same wavelength as me. He said that now the year 2000 is approaching we should get in to the whole millenium testing thing, and once we have made our money he knows of a couple of Icelandic and Irish banks that are sure fire winners.

Well I can now relax and plan for my early retirement safe in the knowledge that my holiday homes in Fukoshima and on the Afganistan / Pakistan border are going to be there for me to relax in.

[TCO95]

Great day! The News of the World has been saved by Aussie business man Rupert Murdoch. He promises Fleet Street will never be the same.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/onthisday/hi/d...00/2492157.stm