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May 24th, 2017, 12:40 AM | #12301 |
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- What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac do?
Stays awake all night wondering if there really is a Dog. - If money is the root of all evil, then why do they ask for it in church? - One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books - the Bible and Darwin's Origin of Species. Surprised, he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books?" "Well," said the orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."
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May 24th, 2017, 11:37 AM | #12302 |
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I told my dad I was considering going back to uni.
He asked if being unemployed with two degrees was more prestigious than being unemployed with one. It was a second degree burn. |
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May 24th, 2017, 11:38 AM | #12303 |
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Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.
'How was he killed?' asked one detective.. 'With a golf gun,' the other detective replied. 'A golf gun! What is a golf gun?' 'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.' |
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May 24th, 2017, 11:43 AM | #12304 | |
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Quote:
Hath eaten many a land as forfeit, And never yet complained of surfeit: The Church alone, beyond all question, Has for ill-gotten goods the right digestion." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, "Faust" |
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May 24th, 2017, 03:22 PM | #12305 |
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May 24th, 2017, 08:46 PM | #12306 |
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If multiple girls called Paige hang out together, is that called a chapter?
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May 24th, 2017, 08:47 PM | #12307 |
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What do you call an expert fisherman?
A master baiter. |
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May 24th, 2017, 08:48 PM | #12308 |
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May 25th, 2017, 02:39 AM | #12309 |
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A friend of mine who is an Ornithologist asked me what my favorite type of bird was. I said "Great Tits & Swallows". "You can't choose two" he said. "I didn't" I replied.
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May 25th, 2017, 02:46 AM | #12310 |
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