Twisted sick jokes that`ll send us ALL to hell. - Page 10

MaxJoker · October 19th, 2013, 05:33 PM

Just nipped over to my Nan's as it`s been awhile since i said hello to the girl.

Yes and fair play to her as despite being 90, she already had all the Halloween decorations up !.

We`re talking cobwebs and insects in the windows, hell even a skeleton on the couch surrounded by very realistic looking flies.

Plus she`d put the skeleton in her favourite dress !.

But then that`s GrandmaJoker for you, she always makes a big effort.

Only problem was despite me ringing her bell for ten minutes solid there was no answer ?.

Oh well i`ll come back this time next year and try again.

As she must have been napping.

MaxJoker · October 20th, 2013, 03:59 PM

Just attended my first baby shower.

The baby's mother wasn`t half livid when she caught me.

What do you get if you hold a twenty pound note between your chin and your chest ?

A good impression of Stephen Hawking at a strip club.

MaxJoker · October 21st, 2013, 04:57 PM

Our first child was born today.

He has Down's Syndrome a cleft palate, and to top it off he's ginger.

Seriously i haven't made this much of a mess with my sperm since i wondered into that hospital burns unit by mistake .

MaxJoker · October 23rd, 2013, 08:07 PM

The wife and i have been debating whether it was time to start a family or not , but weren`t sure.

Then while out walking together today we saw a couple of very young children, splashing and giggling in a neighbours paddling pool.

I stopped stared then turned, looked at the wife and said with a wide grin "Are you thinking what i'm thinking ?"

She nodded coyly and answered "Yes, Max..."

" That settles it, then " I replied "We can't raise children if we're both paedos "

MaxJoker · October 25th, 2013, 03:12 PM

Read today in the paper of a Ukrainian male jailed 40 years for killing a Muslim pensioner and planting bombs at three mosques.

Fcuking Eastern European immigrants !.

Coming over here taking our jobs.

Estreeter · October 25th, 2013, 05:43 PM

The other day I visited my Grandparents, I walked into the lounge room and found my grandma giving my grandpa a blowjob

"Gran, that's disgusting!" I said, "We were meant to bury him last week."

MaxJoker · October 28th, 2013, 04:16 PM

No wonder the Williams sisters always win at tennis.

Black people have centuries of experience serving.

Plus for that matter appearing at the courts.

Bloody hell it's been so windy out there today.

In fact a few hours ago out of nowhere a nine year old girl suddenly got blown onto my erect cock.

Or at least that`s what i`m intending to tell the members of the jury.

I assured the hysterical sobbing girlfriend last night that yes, she did indeed have smoldering good looks.

Then again throwing acid in the face can do that to a girl.

Let`s just hope she learns from the experience and doesn`t forget to tape my favorite shows in future.

MaxJoker · November 1st, 2013, 06:43 PM

Bugger, i just can't seem to make any woman i've had sex with have an orgasm.

Guess in future i`ll need to be more romantic when i rape them.

MaxJoker · November 2nd, 2013, 02:19 PM

This Christmas eve i`m putting out vodka and potatoes for Santa.

As i`m sure some Polish cnut has probably taken his job by now.

My gay next door neighbour has recently been diagnosed with HIV.

What a bummer...

MaxJoker · November 3rd, 2013, 04:04 PM

I've always wondered what it must be like to be an ethnic minority living in England ?.

How i would feel getting funny looks, nasty racist remarks and treated like a second class citizen simply because of the colour of my skin ?.

Well having just got back from visiting London this morning , i bloody know !.

October 19th, 2013, 05:33 PM	#91
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	Just nipped over to my Nan's as it`s been awhile since i said hello to the girl. Yes and fair play to her as despite being 90, she already had all the Halloween decorations up !. We`re talking cobwebs and insects in the windows, hell even a skeleton on the couch surrounded by very realistic looking flies. Plus she`d put the skeleton in her favourite dress !. But then that`s GrandmaJoker for you, she always makes a big effort. Only problem was despite me ringing her bell for ten minutes solid there was no answer ?. Oh well i`ll come back this time next year and try again. As she must have been napping. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 20th, 2013, 03:59 PM	#92
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	Just attended my first baby shower. The baby's mother wasn`t half livid when she caught me. What do you get if you hold a twenty pound note between your chin and your chest ? A good impression of Stephen Hawking at a strip club. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 21st, 2013, 04:57 PM	#93
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	Our first child was born today. He has Down's Syndrome a cleft palate, and to top it off he's ginger. Seriously i haven't made this much of a mess with my sperm since i wondered into that hospital burns unit by mistake . __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 23rd, 2013, 08:07 PM	#94
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	The wife and i have been debating whether it was time to start a family or not , but weren`t sure. Then while out walking together today we saw a couple of very young children, splashing and giggling in a neighbours paddling pool. I stopped stared then turned, looked at the wife and said with a wide grin "Are you thinking what i'm thinking ?" She nodded coyly and answered "Yes, Max..." " That settles it, then " I replied "We can't raise children if we're both paedos " __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 25th, 2013, 03:12 PM	#95
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	Read today in the paper of a Ukrainian male jailed 40 years for killing a Muslim pensioner and planting bombs at three mosques. Fcuking Eastern European immigrants !. Coming over here taking our jobs. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 25th, 2013, 05:43 PM	#96
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,120 Thanks: 449,724 Thanked 896,850 Times in 60,322 Posts	The other day I visited my Grandparents, I walked into the lounge room and found my grandma giving my grandpa a blowjob "Gran, that's disgusting!" I said, "We were meant to bury him last week." __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

October 28th, 2013, 04:16 PM	#97
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	No wonder the Williams sisters always win at tennis. Black people have centuries of experience serving. Plus for that matter appearing at the courts. Bloody hell it's been so windy out there today. In fact a few hours ago out of nowhere a nine year old girl suddenly got blown onto my erect cock. Or at least that`s what i`m intending to tell the members of the jury. I assured the hysterical sobbing girlfriend last night that yes, she did indeed have smoldering good looks. Then again throwing acid in the face can do that to a girl. Let`s just hope she learns from the experience and doesn`t forget to tape my favorite shows in future. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

November 1st, 2013, 06:43 PM	#98
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	Bugger, i just can't seem to make any woman i've had sex with have an orgasm. Guess in future i`ll need to be more romantic when i rape them. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

November 2nd, 2013, 02:19 PM	#99
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	This Christmas eve i`m putting out vodka and potatoes for Santa. As i`m sure some Polish cnut has probably taken his job by now. My gay next door neighbour has recently been diagnosed with HIV. What a bummer... __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

November 3rd, 2013, 04:04 PM	#100
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,560 Times in 69,067 Posts	I've always wondered what it must be like to be an ethnic minority living in England ?. How i would feel getting funny looks, nasty racist remarks and treated like a second class citizen simply because of the colour of my skin ?. Well having just got back from visiting London this morning , i bloody know !. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

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