Post your corny jokes - Page 1214

Estreeter · April 11th, 2017, 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by effCup

Windows has no "multitasking", it just iterates/cycles through a queue of processes one at a time, taking turns. Same with Linux. Same with Unix. Same with MacOS. Same with all single-core computers. #1. More than an opinion.

McDonaldsoft = Laugh

**bloke57** · April 11th, 2017, 12:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by effCup

Windows has no "multitasking", it just iterates/cycles through a queue of processes one at a time, taking turns. Same with Linux. Same with Unix. Same with MacOS. Same with all single-core computers. #1. More than an opinion.

Shit! Who knew effCup was a pseudonym for Prof. Hawking.

**Almero** · April 11th, 2017, 05:45 PM

How to tell what kind of bear is chasing you:

If you're running, and you're running, and you run up a tree, and the bear follows you, it's a black bear.
If you're running, and you're running, and you run up a tree, and the bear shakes you out of the tree, it's a brown bear.
If you're running, and you're running, and you can't find a tree, it's a polar bear.

**effCup** · April 11th, 2017, 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bloke57

pseudonym for Prof. Hawking.

Stephen Hawking might sometimes sound like a computer, but he's not really into them, is he? I always thought he was a physicist.

**bloke57** · April 11th, 2017, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by effCup

Stephen Hawking might sometimes sound like a computer, but he's not really into them, is he? I always thought he was a physicist.

Why was the noble gas upset?

Because it's friend's argon.

(Joke courtesy of Stephen Hawking

)

**gedly** · April 11th, 2017, 10:02 PM

I've never liked Monty Python. I've always preferred something completely different.

Aaron · April 12th, 2017, 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gedly

I've never liked Monty Python. I've always preferred something completely different.

Gedley is really Mister Frampton, a man with three buttocks?

Wait a minute, this is deja vu, that strange feeling I've seen something before....

Quote:

Originally Posted by gedly

I've never liked Monty Python. I've always preferred something completely different.

Gedley is really Mister Frampton, a man with three buttocks?

Wait a minute, this is --

Quote:

Originally Posted by gedly

I've never liked Monty Python. I've always preferred something completely different.

Gedley is really Mister Frampton, a man with... three... buttocks?

Wait....

MaxJoker · April 12th, 2017, 02:08 PM

Told my doctor, "I must have a problem with my penis , Just before I'm about to make love to my girlfriend , she always laughs at it" ,
"Don't worry that's quite normal" he replied ,
"Really ?" I said relieved ,
"Yes" He answered ,
"She laughs at everyone's" .

**Almero** · April 12th, 2017, 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Almero

How to tell what kind of bear is chasing you:

If you're running, and you're running, and you run up a tree, and the bear follows you, it's a black bear.
If you're running, and you're running, and you run up a tree, and the bear shakes you out of the tree, it's a brown bear.
If you're running, and you're running, and you can't find a tree, it's a polar bear.

And if you are running up a tree, and the bear, eating leaves, is already there, it's a panda

**Mal Hombre** · April 12th, 2017, 05:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gedly

I've never liked Monty Python. I've always preferred something completely different.

"What kind of talk is that?"

April 11th, 2017, 05:45 PM	#12133
Almero Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: From Russia with love Posts: 1,432 Thanks: 13,926 Thanked 25,344 Times in 1,425 Posts	How to tell what kind of bear is chasing you: If you're running, and you're running, and you run up a tree, and the bear follows you, it's a black bear. If you're running, and you're running, and you run up a tree, and the bear shakes you out of the tree, it's a brown bear. If you're running, and you're running, and you can't find a tree, it's a polar bear. Last edited by Almero; April 12th, 2017 at 04:58 PM..

April 12th, 2017, 02:08 PM	#12138
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,511 Times in 69,067 Posts	Told my doctor, "I must have a problem with my penis , Just before I'm about to make love to my girlfriend , she always laughs at it" , "Don't worry that's quite normal" he replied , "Really ?" I said relieved , "Yes" He answered , "She laughs at everyone's" . __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

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April 11th, 2017, 10:02 PM	#12136
gedly Veteran Member Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 3,234 Thanks: 19,879 Thanked 69,305 Times in 3,171 Posts	I've never liked Monty Python. I've always preferred something completely different.