Discussion- Shauna Grant

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Originally Posted by Quackerson

That being said, these images come at a price. They are sold for a price. The majority of the people who actually do fucking don't (or at least didn't back in Grant's day) reap the majority of the profits.

One could argue that about lots of industry's . Money wasn't what Grant was craving, this much is obvious. Never understood this angle. I see no indication whatsoever that she cared about that.

Grant/Applegate struck me as a teenaged girl with a lot of problems before she went out to California. She ended up entering porn via a feeder agency for "models": that she willingly sought out the agency and willingly posed/performed didn't change the nature of the business model, which in the end is based on exploitation. Exploiting those who perform and exploiting the desires of the purchasers. To be sure, everybody has free will. Everybody has a choice to say no.

The business exploits/doesn't exploit just like any other business. All kinds of people are prostituted and not appreciated in a thousand different ways and the label here implies that it is something special when it at its base value it is not.

Exploiting happens everywhere. Shauna didn't all of a sudden forget what taking off one's clothes meant. Look at the interview, look at her porn. She obviously was not afraid to draw some limitations (she clearly states that she will not do anal, and she also says she is not banging the dude just because he thinks he should...etc.). When she didn't want to do it, she quit, and had Jake not cut her loose using drugs for leverage, she might still have lived.

Drugs addiction is a powerful thing.

It could well be that Grant/Applegate was for a time proud of what she was doing, but it doesn't strike me that way.

And as I stated, it wasn't about how she felt in the moment. I don't buy that she hated every moment of it anymore that I buy that how she felt at the moment was how she felt in total. The point I was making is that it didn't matter. What she would have felt had she lived on is what matters, and more importantly it is about what she did accomplish not what she felt about it at the time.

It doesn't even appear that she had any long term plan other than living for the moment, since she blew through all the money she made.

I don't think anyone including me would argue with this. So? Lots of young adults don't have plans. I would hope one wouldn't judge her as if she is anything special in that regard.

She brought her porn portfolio home to show her mother, who was understandably not thrilled at what her daughter was doing. She was subsequently shunned by her hometown.

What here hometown thought about her, and what a LOVING mother should think are two different things. Her mother made it clear that the photographs she brought back were not hardcore and she merely wanted to give her something that she thought looked nice. Do you think Shauna would have given her a picture of all holes filled with cock?

A loving mother can be not proud of what her daughter accomplishes, but still support who she is. When all she could talk about after her daughter died is how she was trying to give her organs away, I hear plenty of complete idiocy more than any kind of affection.

What do you think the impact would be of a daughter coming home and trying to give a picture to her mother only to have her mother basically say..fuck you, don't want that trash?

Her mother even said that she was always "fussing about her looks", and that something wasn't right. So let me get this straight, your daughter doesn't look right so hey lets shit all over what she is trying to give to you because hey she wasn't feeling bad enough right?

Her family did go out to California to try and extricate Colleen from the world she had plunged into, but legally there was little to nothing they could do since she was legally an adult. The only recourse they had was to let her know they didn't approve.

And that is the problem in the nutshell isn't it? One more time her parents are telling her how wrong she is, and how wrong her decisions were instead of being warm and nurturing which no doubt put her out there to begin with.

Look at the documentary. Her father flat out says that he never talked to her about her suicide attempt before she moved. Her mother still was trying to say it was attention. Hell her mother still thinks she was murdered. The answer is right there in her face (and the tape recordings) and yet she denies denies denies.

Let me make an example. Lets say you have someone is trying to leave you, the worst thing, and I mean the worst thing is telling that person...no stay, no you are wrong for feeling that way....

All you do is make it even more clear that you never respected their decisions.

Even her friends said that her parents coming out and telling her how wrong her decisions were just made it worse.

It is telling after Grant shot herself that it was her parents who were left standing by her hospital bed picking up the pieces. Not Bobby Hollander. Not her coke dealing boyfriend. Not the adult film studios who made the lion's share of the money for the films Grant appeared in (in point of fact, those studios went into overdrive churning out "tribute" films to Grant and making even MORE money in the wake of her death: Q. how much money do you think the Applegate family saw from that? A. Not even enough to pay for her hospital bills and funeral expenses). Those studios went on to the next new thing. Such is the nature of the business.

Actually what is sad and pathetic is how her mother didn't even know the girls from her home time let alone anyone she worked with. How hard would it have been to look at any of the co-stars in her movies? I mean for crying out loud they visited and they were unaware of her coke friend Laurie who broke the news before Brenda did as well? I mean news flash concerning mother, someone calls and says your daughter has shot herself, you just might want to be going ballistic and not waiting for other people to call you?

What her mom seemed to care more about was the fact that she was embarrassed rather then the fact that maybe just maybe there was more to this story and it didn't start in California (well actually maybe it did since she was born in that state right?).

Money is not everything and if that is even part of the sentence for burying a child then the focus is clearly misdirected. If you look at her mother, she actually blames drugs for why she got into movies when all those around her said that the drugs happened AFTER the movies.

Her mother seemed so cold and clueless, I cannot see how anyone could speak of that circumstance and still not show any damn emotion.

But on the flip side, how do you know Bobby Hollander doesn't feel guilt? How do you know Jake Ehrlich felt nothing (he sure showed remorse on the documentary at least at that time)? They all had their problems and I don't see any of them living this high and mighty life.

Why is it any of their responsibilities to pay for a grown woman's suicide choice? Why is it the industry's responsibility?

It was just a sad story. I can understand the desire to want to find some meaning out of all of it. Grant was a pretty girl. Had a pleasant demeanor on camera. Seemed like a nice albeit confused person. I don't see much meaning in her life or death beyond illustrating the old axiom regarding the life you live and the choices you make being tied to your fate. She wasn't capable of coping with the long term consequences of the capricious short term decisions she made, and I tend to doubt being involved in pornography was a net positive in her life.

I think most people wouldn't be "capable of coping" in some of those examples. A cold uncaring parent is a powerful thing and it can do a mental gymnastics that can screw up lots of people. I would not label her as absolutely incapable, there is also signs that just a little bit of love and support did show some positive results (Jake spoke of them and that is what saddens me more). This is something that obviously had no bearing on her mother because she saw one thing. You are a porn star..fuck you unless you want to come home and go to college....

Listen to how the dad was. He clearly states...well the others turned out ok so I don't understand why she turned out that way. Never heard of an individual huh? Never heard of one being a rebel? In Shauna's own words she was missing something?

Getting back, I see a lot of meaning in her life, and this story remains one of the biggest ones in the porn industry. While it has been told time and time again, the key is that it should not be for nothing.

Shauna's involvement in porn I don't look at as a net positive or negative. I look at it as simply what she achieved. Why does it have to be anything more? If a painter ends up shooting themselves after prostituting their work time and time again does that mean I shouldn't admire the artwork because I think they were in pain while they did it?

While I don't buy for a single solitary second that every moment was painful, I think it is completely besides the point. What Shauna was as a human being should be celebrated (if one wants to), and it is no different then in other person that checked out early for various reasons.

I don't see the porn industry at fault, and they profit from her because they had contracts signed that distributed her images, and I am sure she was well aware of what she did having an impact on her sales later. That is the net positive if I were to really truly think of any.

I see no point in it all being for nothing. She was a beautiful woman that is fun to watch have sex. Nothing wrong with that. The fact that she died early and there is some aspects of her life I can identify with, well that is a little something more.

In closing, I know I have seemed very harsh on her parents, and believe me with all my criticism, I still don't pretend to truly know what they went through.

What I do know is that her friends still seem close and perhaps they are that way because of the tragedy. I am sure the parents are paying for this the rest of their life, and the black hole in lots of people lives are probably not ever going to be filled in the wake of her death.

Believe it or not, even though I never knew her, I feel pretty bad about it too. It had an effect on me, and normal or not, it is the truth.

[Furry Triangle]

that makes sense. theres more natural blondes in Minnesota than anywhere else.
I love golden bush, but its so rare. Especially now that most girls wax and laser their junk smooth.
I like Shauna Grant, and this thread has been very interesting for me. Thanks to everyone.