Post your corny jokes - Page 1478

**photoflex** · June 5th, 2019, 05:16 PM

They changed the name of my pub to 'The John Berkow'.
There are only reruns of unruly sittings of the chamber to be seen on screens,
and every time he yells 'order', you have to do just that.

**Mal Hombre** · June 5th, 2019, 07:56 PM

It used to be called "The John Holmes",You didn't dare ask for a large one....

**trailmaster** · June 6th, 2019, 12:57 PM

A programmer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it into his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I will stay with you for one week."

The programmer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do anything you want." Again the programmer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What's the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The programmer said, "Look I'm a programmer. I don't have time for a girlfriend-- but a talking frog, now that's cool."

Estreeter · June 6th, 2019, 01:22 PM

**mrfixit** · June 6th, 2019, 05:38 PM

**fatrat1** · June 6th, 2019, 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by photoflex

They changed the name of my pub to 'The John Berkow'.
There are only reruns of unruly sittings of the chamber to be seen on screens,
and every time he yells 'order', you have to do just that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mal Hombre

It used to be called "The John Holmes",You didn't dare ask for a large one....

Before that it was called "The Mediums Arms" as it was full of spirits.

**Sir Honkers** · June 6th, 2019, 10:45 PM

What I want to know
...is can orphans eat at a family restaurant?

**Mal Hombre** · June 6th, 2019, 11:06 PM

I would make a joke about My carpet but it would be beneath Me....

**Sir Honkers** · June 7th, 2019, 11:26 AM

My nanna use to say 'Knock Knock' and us kids would say 'Who's there nanna?'
Then she'd say, 'I've forgotten'...and start to cry

**seldomseen** · June 7th, 2019, 11:37 AM

Doctor: You're obese.
-
Patient: For that I definitely want a second opinion.
-
Doctor: You’re quite ugly, too.

June 5th, 2019, 05:16 PM	#14771
photoflex Veteran Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Location: Location Posts: 3,583 Thanks: 37,920 Thanked 127,769 Times in 3,570 Posts	They changed the name of my pub to 'The John Berkow'. There are only reruns of unruly sittings of the chamber to be seen on screens, and every time he yells 'order', you have to do just that. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. I love your thanks, but please thank the original posters first.

June 5th, 2019, 07:56 PM	#14772
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,134 Thanks: 772,635 Thanked 855,649 Times in 57,562 Posts	It used to be called "The John Holmes",You didn't dare ask for a large one.... __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 6th, 2019, 01:22 PM	#14774
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,106 Thanks: 449,616 Thanked 896,744 Times in 60,308 Posts	__________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 6th, 2019, 05:38 PM	#14775
mrfixit Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Elm Street Posts: 9,401 Thanks: 165,774 Thanked 114,810 Times in 9,416 Posts	__________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?

June 6th, 2019, 11:06 PM	#14778
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,134 Thanks: 772,635 Thanked 855,649 Times in 57,562 Posts	I would make a joke about My carpet but it would be beneath Me.... __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 6th, 2019, 12:57 PM	#14773
trailmaster Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Chicago, Illinois, USA Posts: 59,888 Thanks: 1,328,972 Thanked 707,167 Times in 60,062 Posts	A programmer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it into his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I will stay with you for one week." The programmer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do anything you want." Again the programmer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What's the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The programmer said, "Look I'm a programmer. I don't have time for a girlfriend-- but a talking frog, now that's cool."

June 6th, 2019, 10:45 PM	#14777
Sir Honkers Veteran Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Land Of Glorious Leader Posts: 30,341 Thanks: 286,789 Thanked 386,124 Times in 30,296 Posts	What I want to know ...is can orphans eat at a family restaurant?

June 7th, 2019, 11:26 AM	#14779
Sir Honkers Veteran Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Land Of Glorious Leader Posts: 30,341 Thanks: 286,789 Thanked 386,124 Times in 30,296 Posts	My nanna use to say 'Knock Knock' and us kids would say 'Who's there nanna?' Then she'd say, 'I've forgotten'...and start to cry Last edited by Sir Honkers; June 7th, 2019 at 11:31 AM..

June 7th, 2019, 11:37 AM	#14780
seldomseen Veteran Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 38,203 Thanks: 127,400 Thanked 711,972 Times in 38,112 Posts	Doctor: You're obese. - Patient: For that I definitely want a second opinion. - Doctor: You’re quite ugly, too. __________________ -------------------------------------------------------------- Some hae meat, and canna eat.

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