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Old 06-03-2018, 02:28 PM   #13681
Silklover
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Originally Posted by Mister Fide View Post
Got a new girlfriend last week but she has not spoken a word to me yet & it's annoying to have to pump her up each time I take her out of the box.
Could she eventually be Mrs $69.95, why not keep her "fulfilled" all the time?
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Old 06-03-2018, 04:40 PM   #13682
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Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?
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Old 06-03-2018, 11:42 PM   #13683
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Functional? Sounds like an overloaded operator.
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Old 06-04-2018, 12:07 AM   #13684
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You need to explain this, because most of the time I and most other members have no idea what you are saying. It's because you probably have a genius I.Q., and the rest of us are idiots in comparison!
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Old 06-04-2018, 01:11 AM   #13685
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You need to explain this
No. If one has to explain a joke then it's no longer funny.

... not that I was making a joke, really.

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no idea what you are saying.
I already provided explanatory links above--you want even more!?

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I.Q.
No.

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idiots
̶N̶o̶ cough!
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Old 06-04-2018, 08:52 AM   #13686
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I asked my Welsh friend how many sexual partners he'd had.


He started counting but he fell asleep.
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Old 06-06-2018, 12:06 AM   #13687
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Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm and have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital. Two dozen babies are in the ward, 23 of which are crying and screaming. One, over in the corner, is smiling serenely. A nurse comes by, and to the men’s delight, she points out the happy child as theirs.
“Isn’t it wonderful?” Brad exclaims. ”All these unhappy children, and ours is so happy.”
“He’s happy now,” says the nurse. “But just wait until we take the pacifier out of his a*s.”
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Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?
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Old 06-07-2018, 11:52 AM   #13688
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mister Fide View Post
Got a new girlfriend last week but she has not spoken a word to me yet & it's annoying to have to pump her up each time I take her out of the box.
At least you get a blow job everytime.
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Old 06-07-2018, 11:55 AM   #13689
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You are not allowed to say "Black Paint anymore". Due to political correctness you have to say

"Leroy can you please paint that wall"
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Old 06-07-2018, 07:51 PM   #13690
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A handlebar said to a saddle, "I've always been very aware of my mortality". The saddle replies, "Well, the way I see it, we're all just part of a cycle".
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