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Old February 3rd, 2017, 10:58 PM   #3311
trailmaster
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Wish granted, however, this genie is so good as a moderator that he is elevated to supermoderator by the administration and he then bans you and sends your personal information to the Australian Security Intelligence Service, and the Australian Security Intelligence Organization, and the Australian Federal Police. After they tortue you for info they then deport you to the American detention center at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba. You are tortured with starving, freezing, water boarding, flogging, ripping out your finger nails, and given mind altering drugs. After a few months of this you are a vegetable. They dump you and the other scum into an unmarked trough and pour in several hundred gallons of acid to destroy your body completely.


I wish I could travel back in time to the time of the dinosaurs.
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Old February 4th, 2017, 06:18 PM   #3312
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Granted. A TREX recognizes you TM. He thinks your are a female.
I let you imagine what happens next....
I wish I travel in the past, find TM and save him from TREX lover!
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Old February 4th, 2017, 08:28 PM   #3313
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Originally Posted by footstep View Post
Granted. A TREX recognizes you TM. He thinks your are a female.
I let you imagine what happens next....
I wish I travel in the past, find TM and save him from TREX lover!
How is it that if I tamper with the timeline the world ends but footstep and trailmaster can do it with impunity. Anyhoo wish granted. You both travel back to the Age Of Dinosaurs, coincidentally, on the same day that bowlinggreen is back there with his big gun.
Boom! trailmaster is blown to smithereenies, taken out by a shell meant to bring down a stegosaurus. It's the perfect crime, murdered 60 million years before he was born. No more corrupting bowlinggreen's wishes.
Poor footstep, a victim of bowlinggreen's desire to leave no witnesses, even 60 million years ago.
Speaking of Bowling Green, I wish to know more about the massacre he is responsible for.

Last edited by Sir Honkers; February 4th, 2017 at 08:45 PM..
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Old February 5th, 2017, 04:05 PM   #3314
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Well, in the alternate timeline, there was a massacre - two jihadis smuggled a Pakistani nuke into the USA and blew up part of Akron, Ohio. Fortunately, I was able to jump into that time about 15 minutes before the bomb went off, transport the nuke back to the Cretaceous, and leave the two terrorists tied up naked for the authorities to arrest.

So the bowling green massacre took place, but it also didn't. The only people who know about it are people like KellyAnne Conway, and Trump, and other higher ups in the government. It's a highly classified secret.

And now that you know about it, we can't really leave you hanging around up here to blab, can we? So it's back to the Cretaceous for you. Being creative, I'll let you have your choice of deaths. TM's T-Rex is still about, so you can be dinner. Or, since you are strapped to the nuke, you can push the detonator and take the painless way out. Or, if you are against suicide but hate the idea of all of that painful flesh-ripping and bone crunching involved in being a T-Rex dinner, I can blast you with my 800 Nitro Express dinosaur rifle. I need to get some better bullets for that anyway. Doesn't seem to slow down those damn Tricerotops very much.

I wish that Pandora was real, and I could fly about on a hovercraft there, enjoying all of the wondrous sights.
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Old February 6th, 2017, 01:51 PM   #3315
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Wish granted, however, those native intelligent giant humanoids called Na'vi see you and think you are one of the invading humans. They with their flying mounts capture you destroy your hovercraft and take you up to the highest peak of one of their mountain hideaways. There you are kept until they can decide what to do with you. You try to escape when they are sleeping , but you lose your foothold and fall screaming 4,000 feet to your death. The Na'vi then feed your mashed carcass to their animals!!


I wish I had my own giant yacht which had 20 rooms, and a staff of 20 men to do all the work. All I do is just enjoy all the amenities on the yacht, such as a fully stocked kitchen with food and liquor, books, videos, music cd's, and some beautiful big boobed women to play with.
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Old February 6th, 2017, 03:47 PM   #3316
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Wish Granted, but the 20 men are all bi-sexual and spend all day servicing the big boobed women you are not at that moment "playing with". At night, however the leather gear and bondage stuff comes out, so does the bi part, and your arse is simply not up to it, and all the "discharged se(a)men you swallow makes you extreamy sea sick.

I wish I was fluent in 5 languages.
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Old February 6th, 2017, 10:05 PM   #3317
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I wish I was fluent in 5 languages.
Wish granted.

You are now fully proficient in Coptic, Sanskrit, Aramaic, Akkadian and Babylonian.

Good f*cking luck with that!

I wish I was able to control Donald Trump's bowel movements to comic effect.
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Old February 7th, 2017, 09:14 AM   #3318
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Granted, but as Donald Trump is so concerned about cyberterrorism, he issues a decree for all Government Computer Communication to be in Coptic, Sanskrit, Aramaic, Akkadian and Babylonian. As I am now the singular world expert in said languages I have so much work to do that I need some assistance, Donald vaulenteers his bowel movement assistant, as he hasn't had a shit for years because he has learned how to use his mouth for that function.

I wish I was able to predict the future developements in cybercrime and prevent it from happening.
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Old February 8th, 2017, 11:58 PM   #3319
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Wish granted. You have pre-cognition. You can see what happens in the future of cybercrime and prevent it, however, one day you see in your mind that in the next week no cybercrime happened at all, and you are not sure why, so you wait. As the day approaches you get more and more bewildered. Finally the day comes. It is a bright and very sunny day. In fact the sun seems a lot bigger and brighter than ever before. You think to yourself; "Oh No, not now, no,no, no" and then the Sun goes nova and wipes out the entire solar system.


I wish I was a kangaroo in Australia.
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Old February 9th, 2017, 01:11 AM   #3320
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I wish I was a kangaroo in Australia. lol
WTF ... Sweet Jeebus Granted
You are shunned by your Rabbi because....





I will get back to you on my wish I cant typed Im laughing to hard ,
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