Post your corny jokes - Page 1370

**fatrat1** · August 19th, 2018, 09:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gedly

I'll Sky+ it and have a Fantastic Day watching it later.

You sure ain't Nobody's Fools.

**fatrat1** · August 19th, 2018, 09:20 PM

Another one for us older Brits.

Patient: Doctor Doctor I keep singing "Stand & Deliver" & "Prince Charming"

Doctor: Your just being adamant.

**Mal Hombre** · August 19th, 2018, 10:03 PM

I bought a car from Salt N' Pepa,Piece of crap,I ended up having to Push It..

**ball7** · August 19th, 2018, 10:05 PM

The British caveman had a word for something that was totally unnecessary.
It was Essex

**otokonomidori** · August 20th, 2018, 12:12 AM

Top 3 Jokes at this years Edinburgh Festival:

1. ‘Working at the Jobcentre has to be a tense job – knowing that if you get fired, you still have to come in the next day’ – Adam Rowe

2. ‘I had a job drilling holes for water – it was well boring’ – Leo Kearse

3. ‘I took out a loan to pay for an exorcism. If I don’t pay it back, I’m going to get repossessed’ – Olaf Falafel

**effCup** · August 20th, 2018, 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mal Hombre

I ended up having to Push It..

Definitely a piece of crap... unless you caught the trots.

... giddyap.

**gmcbee** · August 20th, 2018, 12:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jafad

A dog goes into a Job Centre and says, "Excuse me? Have you got any jobs going?"

The man behind the counter says "Fuck me! You're a talking Dog!? You should join the circus!"

The Dog replies, "Why? What do they need a plumber for?"

A dog goes into a bar and says "Gimme a pint and two shots."

The bartender says "What's 'a matter? RUFF day?"

The dog glares at her and says "Don't start with me, Linda."

MaxJoker · August 20th, 2018, 01:04 PM

I’ve just started reading my first ever Braille horror story. I think that something scary is about to happen ,

Can just feel it.

**ball7** · August 20th, 2018, 06:04 PM

Boomerangs are like STDs.

**gedly** · August 20th, 2018, 09:57 PM

A friend said to me, "You know, today's a green letter day for me".
I reply, " Don't you mean a red letter day?"
My friend says, "Well, I am colour blind".

August 19th, 2018, 09:20 PM	#13692
fatrat1 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2016 Posts: 2,708 Thanks: 52,473 Thanked 27,274 Times in 2,641 Posts	Another one for us older Brits. Patient: Doctor Doctor I keep singing "Stand & Deliver" & "Prince Charming" Doctor: Your just being adamant. __________________ My Avatar is To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

August 19th, 2018, 10:03 PM	#13693
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,127 Thanks: 772,558 Thanked 855,620 Times in 57,558 Posts	I bought a car from Salt N' Pepa,Piece of crap,I ended up having to Push It.. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

August 20th, 2018, 01:04 PM	#13698
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,511 Times in 69,067 Posts	I’ve just started reading my first ever Braille horror story. I think that something scary is about to happen , Can just feel it. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

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August 19th, 2018, 10:05 PM	#13694
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,976 Times in 15,730 Posts	The British caveman had a word for something that was totally unnecessary. It was Essex

August 20th, 2018, 12:12 AM	#13695
otokonomidori 緑の男 Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Jockistan, UK. Posts: 8,316 Thanks: 39,016 Thanked 122,398 Times in 8,316 Posts	Top 3 Jokes at this years Edinburgh Festival: 1. ‘Working at the Jobcentre has to be a tense job – knowing that if you get fired, you still have to come in the next day’ – Adam Rowe 2. ‘I had a job drilling holes for water – it was well boring’ – Leo Kearse 3. ‘I took out a loan to pay for an exorcism. If I don’t pay it back, I’m going to get repossessed’ – Olaf Falafel

August 20th, 2018, 06:04 PM	#13699
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,976 Times in 15,730 Posts	Boomerangs are like STDs.

August 20th, 2018, 09:57 PM	#13700
gedly Veteran Member Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 3,234 Thanks: 19,879 Thanked 69,303 Times in 3,171 Posts	A friend said to me, "You know, today's a green letter day for me". I reply, " Don't you mean a red letter day?" My friend says, "Well, I am colour blind".