The Aftershave Thread !

[MaxJoker]

Well we`ve got one about nuts and even one about shaving them

So why not an aftershave thread.


I mean apart from the fact i don`t use it myself

But then that`s what this threads about .

Me i don`t use it because most times i`ve been around a bloke with it on they`ve stunk out a five foot radius and i`ve thought what a dope.

Also they`ve smelt of intense citrus or whatever

Yeah really manly

Course everyone knows i never use aftershave ; but does that stop certain people buying them for me ?

Balls does it

Mostly i`m able to dodge the gift by not opening it and thinking i`ll give it to someone else as a present.

Only i never have , as if i was the sort of bloke who knew other blokes who liked exchanging gifts of aftershave with me i wouldn`t have joined this forum in the first place

Currently i have four sealed bottles of the stuff somewhere in storage. Which is a bit of a bastard really , as if you get an expensive gift you`d like to be able to bloody well use it otherwise what`s the point


Still the worst thing is when they give you the aftershave and then insist you open it right then and there and smell it


That`s why i`m now lumbered with these two fragrant things that cost maybe £50 each



Also why i`ve been trying to find other uses for them !


Er , such as a wasp killer


Yes i`ve said too much


Which is what i`m hoping you`ll do as well .

Sooooooooo



Do you use aftershave

If so what kind

If not why not

[Mal Hombre]

Well I don't use aftershave now ,since I have a beard and I don't think I ever used it.In the days when I did scrape the hair off My handsome chin ,I did use various products to try to ease the process or soothe My sore cheeks afterwards but not aftershave as such.If I did it would be a macho product like this.

[MaxJoker]

Originally Posted by Mal Hombre

Well I don't use aftershave now ,since I have a beard and I don't think I ever used it.In the days when I did scrape the hair off My handsome chin ,I did use various products to try to ease the process or soothe My sore cheeks afterwards but not aftershave as such.If I did it would be a macho product like this.

Yeah that`s the thing ; you`d want a macho looking bottle with a powerful he man type fragrance , in other words something catered to your specific needs.

Talking of macho he-men i`ve just received a PM from Greenman saying he`d be happy to take an aftershave off my hands.

Unfortunately though i didn`t have his brand





Talking of famous brands , if you look carefully at my photo you can actually see a reflection on me in my red army top

Oh and i meant Liverpool is the famous brand .

Not me


Ps
Hope you all noticed how i didn`t use Mal`s "Sore cheeks" in some awful pun filled response

Even though the options available to me were spread wide open

[Estreeter]

Yes and no,
I only shave once a week, or if going out so it's a bit pointless. But if going out, I do, at the insistence of somebody else that I wear it, so I've used this for quite a few years, and only been through about 5 bottles



BUT
When I started shaving and going out too attract girls and seldom scored it was the mid 80's and this crap was a bit of a must too wear



I don't know why I wore it, it's not really my thing too copy everybody else, ya ended up smelling like a walkin' pine tree

[billybunter]

Never use aftershave. I don't want to smell like a tarts handbag To me aftershave reminds me of the 1970s.

[MaxJoker]

Originally Posted by billybunter

Never use aftershave.

Well how could you , your hands are always otherwise engaged

Originally Posted by billybunter

I don't want to smell like a tarts handbag

You mean you once went out with a woman who`s bag smelled like High Karate

Originally Posted by billybunter

To me aftershave reminds me of the 1970s.

Well i`m not surprised you don`t use it .

As the feminist movement began back then and what man wants to be reminded of that every time he has a blade near his throat

[shodan2011]

Like estreeter, I only shave once a week. I still slap a bit of aftershave on, though. This is what I'm using at the minute:



If I had the money I'd use this:

[keefriff]

I sometimes will splash on this sassy little altar boy enticer shortly after my monthly back shaving. It's an old, tested and refined recipe that's been handled and passed down for ages. It smells a little bit like pre-teen spirit.

Hey, if you can't get laid with this guy on your side well then you have bigger problems than just your body odor.

In all seriousness, when I was out actively pursuing women instead of lying prostrate crying and wondering how it all came to this, I would splash on a tiny bit of cologne, (important phrase there: tiny bit) on my neck and face to try and get my smell good on. Usually to no avail what with my chronic flatulence disorder and all. I still have a bottle of Drakkar that I have had for at least 15 years. Hardly ever use it anymore except maybe to gargle with.

[Greenman]

Definitely old school as they say with Brut 33 "the great smelling aroma" or words to that effect that we were urged by the likes of the late Sir Henry Cooper & Kevin Keegan to "splash it on all over" well not too far over because if it hit your lower regions it stung!!
"Oh yeah yeah yeah, he's got the great smell of Brut!"

[billybunter]

Can you still buy brut?