The corrupt a wish game

[Sir Honkers]

Originally Posted by bowlinggreen

I wish Miami Vice was real and I was Sonny Crockett cruising along through South Beach in my Ferrari in the year 1986.

Granted. However two years later in 1988, you suffer massive head trauma from a boat explosion and implausibly come to believe that you are actually Sonny Burnett a ruthless enforcer for the Manolo Cartel and the trail of bodies you leave in your wake soon alert the Vice Division to your activities. However, fragmented memories of your previous life as an undercover police officer return with increasing frequency until, aware of what you have become and unable to bear the truth and the shame of it, you hand yourself in to your old unit, and now have to face the impending and perhaps insurmountable struggle of trying to clear your name.
Fortunately for us, before that saga begins, your series is cancelled.
I wish I was Raffles, Gentleman Thief and Ladies Man Extraordinaire.

[bigtrain45]

I wish I was Raffles, Gentleman Thief and Ladies Man Extraordinaire.

Granted. But you lose half your fortune at the baccarat table in the Grand Casino in Monte Carlo. You console yourself by picking up 5 beautiful young women at the casino bar. You spend two days in bed with all 5 of them, but within a couple of days you aren't feeling so well. You go to your doctor and learn you have contracted HIV, Syphilis, Gonnorhea, Hepatitis C, and HPV. Each girl carried a different disease.

I wish I was 21 again, and the best baseball player in the world.

[trailmaster]

Granted. You're 21 years old and the best baseball player in the world of 63,000,000 years ago. No baseball, just dinosaurs who chase you down and gobble you up!


I wish I could go back in time and prevent John F. Kennedy from being assassinated. What would the world look like now?

[bigtrain45]

I wish I could go back in time and prevent John F. Kennedy from being assassinated. What would the world look like now?

Granted. Unfortunately, JFK's involvement in the coup that took down President Diem in Viet-Nam comes out, and he is seen and photographed with Ann-Margret leaving the Chateau Marmont in LA, which costs him the election in 1964. Barry Goldwater becomes President, escalates the war in Viet-Nam, drops a nuke on Hanoi, leading to a nuclear exchange with the Russians, and the complete destruction of civilization as we know it.

I wish I could spend a weekend with this woman.

[trailmaster]

Wish granted. You are elated that you are going to spend a night with pornstar Anna Belle, but there is something that you don't know about her. She gets off sticking weird things into her cooter. When she comes to your apartment and undresses she wants you to stick you hand and arm as far as it will go up her pu...y. You say ok. She is moaning and groaning as she humps on your arm, but then you want to take it out and she suddenly gets mad then she gets crazy. She tightens her cooter muscles and you can't remove your arm. Then your arm starts to hurt and you see blood running down your arm. You meanwhile are pulling at your arm as hard as you can but it won't budge. Then Anna punches you in the face and you can't believe how hard it was. You nose is bleeding and your lip is bleeding and bruised. Anna just laughs and continues to hump your arm. Then she picks you up and slams you into the wall. You lose consciousness.
When you wake up you start too scream, because you notice that she cut your arm off and took it with her. You're running around your place and all the while blood is shooting out of your stump. You run out of your apartment and try to run down the stairs but trip and fall all the way down a hundred steps and break your neck.


I wish I only could eat desserts. I would never have to cook again.

[ruffroundedges]

Granted:

You can survive on only desserts but they are desserts baked and prepared by ME.
You soon become perpetually drunk and develop type 2 diabetes.
As you stumble around the apartment you gash your shin open on the coffee table, gangrene sets in fast due to the poor blood flow in the femoral vein and the pain is intense.
You make your way down to the parking area to drive your self to Emerg. But you soon find your car has been vandalized by The Poopy Head Gang.
In a state of drunken panic, you attempt to drive the car as it is and subsequently crash into a lamp post.
The police arrive to find you limping staggerdly (It's a word now!) around in the street, yelling obscenities about cream puffed eclairs and crazy ballcap wearing, bearded truck driving dessert chefs.

You spend the rest of your days in the psychiatric ward; bunny wrapped for your own protection.

We mourn.

I wish I could control The Force like Luke Skywalker.

[footstep]

Wish granted.
But jedi 's specific diet makes you fell crazy.
You finish happy , dark force is your now your home. VEF, alcohol, pizza, burgers...
Hey!! that's a good finishing story!
I wish I could control The Force like Vador.

[bowlinggreen]

Wish granted. You grab a police officer's heart with your mind when you get stopped for speeding. Unfortunately you don't notice his partner, who ventilates your skull with a load of buckshot while you are busy with his compadre.



I wish that the dog lady who lives on my street would feel a strange compulsion to pick up her dog's poop and put it in her purse instead of leaving it whenever her dog leaves one of his special gifts on my lawn.

[Sir Honkers]

Originally Posted by bowlinggreen

I wish that the dog lady who lives on my street would feel a strange compulsion to pick up her dog's poop and put it in her purse instead of leaving it whenever her dog leaves one of his special gifts on my lawn.

Granted. Some weeks later, having forgotten you made that wish, you are strolling past her house and see her getting out of her car loaded up with shopping. As she struggles up to the front door she drops her purse without noticing. Knowing her habit of keeping large sums of money in it, you hide in the shrubbery and once she goes inside you dart out, pick up the purse and run off to the park where you sit down on a bench. Chuckling to yourself in anticipation of a financial windfall, you open the purse and plunge your hand in.

I wish I had a porn version of The Donna Reed show starring Donna Reed as she looked back then when I was a horny fourteen year old.

[ruffroundedges]

Originally Posted by loosegoose

Granted. Some weeks later, having forgotten you made that wish, you are strolling past her house and see her getting out of her car loaded up with shopping. As she struggles up to the front door she drops her purse without noticing. Knowing her habit of keeping large sums of money in it, you hide in the shrubbery and once she goes inside you dart out, pick up the purse and run off to the park where you sit down on a bench. Chuckling to yourself in anticipation of a financial windfall, you open the purse and plunge your hand in.

I wish I had a porn version of The Donna Reed show starring Donna Reed as she looked back then when I was a horny fourteen year old.

Deaf Genie answers your wish. You are the proud owner of the only copy of Donald Weed tranni extraordinaire re-enacting the Donna Reed Show.
You watch it then proceed to gouge out your eyes with a spork.

I wish I had a shrubbery.