X Thousand Things We Learned From Watching Porn - Page 51

**HugoHackenbush** · October 24th, 2018, 09:57 PM

578. Your typical housewife, when preparing dinner in the kitchen, will wear high heels, a short skirt, an apron, and nothing else. This arrangement will allow her large, pendulous breasts to protrude out the side of the apron. This will, in turn, insatiably arouse her man, who will insist on having sex on the kitchen counter-top.

N.B. Spillage of food on to the kitchen floor is optional.

**CARLTON BROWN** · October 24th, 2018, 11:15 PM

579. Plumbers working underneath a kitchen sink will often find a good looking semi-clothed housewife standing over them with their legs wide apart. The woman will insist of being taken roughly on a kitchen counter probably in payment for the repair being undertaken.

580. Plumbers are normally well equipped with a substantial tool that can be used for a number of useful purposes.

**palo5** · October 25th, 2018, 12:42 AM

581. Plumbers, poolboys & pizza deliverymen should hook up -- they could have every hotwife in the neighborhood

**Sir Honkers** · October 25th, 2018, 09:49 PM

582. That Japanese ladies can't travel on public transport without getting felt up to an orgasm and every Japanese bloke has some gadget that stops time.

**Sharkhunter** · October 30th, 2018, 02:18 AM

583. Your wife or girlfriend always has a friend or work colleague who is up for it after a few drinks.

584. Said wife or girlfriend discovers you with said friend or work colleague, but rather than getting angry chooses to join in and show lesbian tendencies that you never knew existed.

**palo5** · October 30th, 2018, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sharkhunter

584. Said wife or girlfriend discovers you with said friend or work colleague, but rather than getting angry chooses to join in and show lesbian tendencies that you never knew existed.

585. That's true. All wives are closet bi-sexuals, and stimulate girlfriends for cheating husbands. But they love it. Wives are fluffers for women

**HugoHackenbush** · December 5th, 2018, 03:45 PM

586. All hotels have a staff of on-site hookers ready to be at your room on a moments notice. Just ask the bartender to set you up.

**Mal Hombre** · December 5th, 2018, 04:19 PM

587. If a woman finds a burglar in Her home,She will inevitably have sex with Him.It wouldn't seem like much of a deterrent..

**CARLTON BROWN** · December 5th, 2018, 04:31 PM

587. Any reasonable looking Japanese woman can expect to have a hand shoved up her skirt while travelling to work on an overcrowded train.

588. Japanese people cannot always see exactly what they are doing during sex, as their private parts suffer from a strange local effect called "blurring," which science has yet to explain.

589. Many Japanese women seem to insist on being tied up before and during sex. This may be to prevent them from becoming over concerned during the time of "blurring," sometimes considered a religious experience.

590. All Geishas are secretly trained to overwhelm Western men with prolongued periods of shagging in large bathtubs. Underwater intercourse is not always easily visible, so "blurring" does not become a huge distraction for foreigners.

**palo5** · December 5th, 2018, 04:49 PM

591. German women love being peed on after sex. Or German men love peeing on their women after sex. Maybe both. Who cleans the unsanitary mess is unclear

October 24th, 2018, 09:57 PM	#501
HugoHackenbush Veteran Marxist Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Wherever it's warm Posts: 14,166 Thanks: 206,115 Thanked 337,402 Times in 14,219 Posts	578. Your typical housewife, when preparing dinner in the kitchen, will wear high heels, a short skirt, an apron, and nothing else. This arrangement will allow her large, pendulous breasts to protrude out the side of the apron. This will, in turn, insatiably arouse her man, who will insist on having sex on the kitchen counter-top. N.B. Spillage of food on to the kitchen floor is optional. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Just give me your body - I'll give you my brain - it's a fair exchange

October 30th, 2018, 02:18 AM	#505
Sharkhunter Gusset Man & Jizzmaster Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Wanking, but not the city in China Posts: 2,043 Thanks: 5,203 Thanked 34,738 Times in 2,027 Posts	583. Your wife or girlfriend always has a friend or work colleague who is up for it after a few drinks. 584. Said wife or girlfriend discovers you with said friend or work colleague, but rather than getting angry chooses to join in and show lesbian tendencies that you never knew existed. __________________ "Birth Control Tip #2431: Shoot your load in a girl's mouth or on her face instead of inside her sweet bits. Result: no expensive burden, stretch marks or saggy tits". To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

December 5th, 2018, 03:45 PM	#507
HugoHackenbush Veteran Marxist Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Wherever it's warm Posts: 14,166 Thanks: 206,115 Thanked 337,402 Times in 14,219 Posts	586. All hotels have a staff of on-site hookers ready to be at your room on a moments notice. Just ask the bartender to set you up. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Just give me your body - I'll give you my brain - it's a fair exchange

December 5th, 2018, 04:19 PM	#508
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,198 Thanks: 773,367 Thanked 856,548 Times in 57,629 Posts	587. If a woman finds a burglar in Her home,She will inevitably have sex with Him.It wouldn't seem like much of a deterrent.. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

December 5th, 2018, 04:31 PM	#509
CARLTON BROWN Grand Vizier Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Ruraltania Posts: 3,224 Thanks: 35,728 Thanked 35,661 Times in 3,216 Posts	587. Any reasonable looking Japanese woman can expect to have a hand shoved up her skirt while travelling to work on an overcrowded train. 588. Japanese people cannot always see exactly what they are doing during sex, as their private parts suffer from a strange local effect called "blurring," which science has yet to explain. 589. Many Japanese women seem to insist on being tied up before and during sex. This may be to prevent them from becoming over concerned during the time of "blurring," sometimes considered a religious experience. 590. All Geishas are secretly trained to overwhelm Western men with prolongued periods of shagging in large bathtubs. Underwater intercourse is not always easily visible, so "blurring" does not become a huge distraction for foreigners. Last edited by CARLTON BROWN; December 5th, 2018 at 11:00 PM..

October 24th, 2018, 11:15 PM	#502
CARLTON BROWN Grand Vizier Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Ruraltania Posts: 3,224 Thanks: 35,728 Thanked 35,661 Times in 3,216 Posts	579. Plumbers working underneath a kitchen sink will often find a good looking semi-clothed housewife standing over them with their legs wide apart. The woman will insist of being taken roughly on a kitchen counter probably in payment for the repair being undertaken. 580. Plumbers are normally well equipped with a substantial tool that can be used for a number of useful purposes.

October 25th, 2018, 12:42 AM	#503
palo5 Former Staff Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 16,579 Thanks: 452,836 Thanked 222,662 Times in 16,567 Posts	581. Plumbers, poolboys & pizza deliverymen should hook up -- they could have every hotwife in the neighborhood

October 25th, 2018, 09:49 PM	#504
Sir Honkers Veteran Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Land Of Glorious Leader Posts: 30,436 Thanks: 287,480 Thanked 387,195 Times in 30,392 Posts	582. That Japanese ladies can't travel on public transport without getting felt up to an orgasm and every Japanese bloke has some gadget that stops time.

December 5th, 2018, 04:49 PM	#510
palo5 Former Staff Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 16,579 Thanks: 452,836 Thanked 222,662 Times in 16,567 Posts	591. German women love being peed on after sex. Or German men love peeing on their women after sex. Maybe both. Who cleans the unsanitary mess is unclear