Women jokes - Page 57

MaxJoker · May 23rd, 2018, 10:25 AM

Under station interview the detective asked me to honestly examine why I keep beating my wife ,

Oddly the answer of "Height , weight advantage longer reach and quicker footwork" if anything made the situation worse though.

Estreeter · May 23rd, 2018, 01:29 PM

This bloke was having dinner at a mates place
.
Every time the mate needed something, he preceded his request to his Missus by calling her "Love" or "Darls" or "Sweetie" and so on.

His mate looked at him and said, "That's nice you've been married for 20 years and you still use those little pet names."

He replied, "Well, honestly mate, I've forgotten her name."

MaxJoker · May 29th, 2018, 11:38 AM

For the first time in five years the wife swallowed after a blowjob ,

wonder if it's a sign she's coming out of her coma ?.

MaxJoker · June 3rd, 2018, 02:51 PM

Mrs and I had a hell of an argument last night over where we`d be going on our holidays ,

Thankfully it`s now sorted ,

I`m going to Thailand and she`s off to the battered wives hostel.

MaxJoker · June 4th, 2018, 12:20 PM

We had a minutes silence in our house today ,

The wife popped next door.

MaxJoker · June 8th, 2018, 06:09 PM

I married a real trophy wife ,

The names of the previous winners are all tattooed on her arse.

MaxJoker · June 10th, 2018, 04:09 PM

I've just been to visit the wife's grave again... Bless her,

She thinks I'm digging a pond .

Estreeter · June 11th, 2018, 10:25 AM

This bloke, Max we'll call him, had been feeling sick and was finally convinced to see a Doctor after his girlfriend, Erica's, constant nagging. After a thorough examination, and much thought, the Doctor was ready to tell Max and a very worried Erica his prognosis. Max was too stressed out. He would need 6 months of pure relaxation. Erica, very agitated, took out her notepad to begin writing down his list of orders for these months of relaxation. "How should I go about it?" asked Max. "OK" said the Doc "I would like your girlfriend to take one tranquilizer four times a day…"

MaxJoker · June 11th, 2018, 01:56 PM

My wife said she can do anything twice as well as me ,

So I donated a kidney.

MaxJoker · June 12th, 2018, 03:40 PM

Of course I think a fetus should have more rights than a woman ,

The fetus still has a chance of being a man !.

Mrs was trying to be sexy last night laying on the bed sliding a lollypop in and out of her pussy ,

"Steady on love" I said "You'll need that in the morning to help see the kids across the road".

May 23rd, 2018, 10:25 AM	#561
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	Under station interview the detective asked me to honestly examine why I keep beating my wife , Oddly the answer of "Height , weight advantage longer reach and quicker footwork" if anything made the situation worse though. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

May 23rd, 2018, 01:29 PM	#562
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,117 Thanks: 449,715 Thanked 896,771 Times in 60,316 Posts	This bloke was having dinner at a mates place . Every time the mate needed something, he preceded his request to his Missus by calling her "Love" or "Darls" or "Sweetie" and so on. His mate looked at him and said, "That's nice you've been married for 20 years and you still use those little pet names." He replied, "Well, honestly mate, I've forgotten her name." __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

May 29th, 2018, 11:38 AM	#563
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	For the first time in five years the wife swallowed after a blowjob , wonder if it's a sign she's coming out of her coma ?. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 3rd, 2018, 02:51 PM	#564
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	Mrs and I had a hell of an argument last night over where we`d be going on our holidays , Thankfully it`s now sorted , I`m going to Thailand and she`s off to the battered wives hostel. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 4th, 2018, 12:20 PM	#565
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	We had a minutes silence in our house today , The wife popped next door. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 8th, 2018, 06:09 PM	#566
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	I married a real trophy wife , The names of the previous winners are all tattooed on her arse. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 10th, 2018, 04:09 PM	#567
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	I've just been to visit the wife's grave again... Bless her, She thinks I'm digging a pond . __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 11th, 2018, 10:25 AM	#568
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,117 Thanks: 449,715 Thanked 896,771 Times in 60,316 Posts	This bloke, Max we'll call him, had been feeling sick and was finally convinced to see a Doctor after his girlfriend, Erica's, constant nagging. After a thorough examination, and much thought, the Doctor was ready to tell Max and a very worried Erica his prognosis. Max was too stressed out. He would need 6 months of pure relaxation. Erica, very agitated, took out her notepad to begin writing down his list of orders for these months of relaxation. "How should I go about it?" asked Max. "OK" said the Doc "I would like your girlfriend to take one tranquilizer four times a day…" __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 11th, 2018, 01:56 PM	#569
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	My wife said she can do anything twice as well as me , So I donated a kidney. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 12th, 2018, 03:40 PM	#570
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	Of course I think a fetus should have more rights than a woman , The fetus still has a chance of being a man !. Mrs was trying to be sexy last night laying on the bed sliding a lollypop in and out of her pussy , "Steady on love" I said "You'll need that in the morning to help see the kids across the road". __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode