Porn production "pet hates"

[Trip]

Originally Posted by jsandy

1. Gaping assholes, pissing, and fisting.
2. silicone breast implants that look like bowling balls
3. the faces of male pornstars
4. bored or unhappy looking models
6. photographers with no imagination or creativity
7. anything specifically meant to be degrading, humiliating, violent, or ugly
8. perfect looking women who ruin their looks with plastic surgery

^agreed.

Addition to #6: wrong angle. In many models' cases, I call this, "Horribly mis-managed talent"....Please, move around to the front where the model is, PLEASE? I swear they have these gorgeous models in front of them, and what do they shoot for us......what a waste of a good model's assets...I am sure any one of us here could do better, but we are not tied into the p0rn mafia. I cannot believe what these young shooters and directors are thinking. Probably that we are all just $$paying marks, they wanna get paid not laid.


- Female Ejaculation. Are these production guys fooling anyone? These women are urinating. Takes any joy out of watching female solo scenes. Mix that with aforementioned shaved, tattood, and pierced vaginas, it is pretty much over for the art of solo female photography. I know most here do not like solo, but if done correctly, it is extremely sensual, even mentally, not just visiually.

- Also agree with the saliva issue, but more on the long, drawn out loogie scenes, where someone, somewhere, fetishizes over the spit contest, and how long it takes to go from a model's mouth to the target location. If they are not naturally wet, it is painfully and obviously fake. Maybe this is a comedic aspect, to keep models amused.


-Insane clownesque smiling. This one can't be all that bad, but is often times out of place. In a heated scene, a glaring smile, where otherwise would be the also inadequate screams. You'd think they would really "fake" it, by acting aroused or closing their eyes. It's also evident in the old silwa magazines. Always appeared strange to me, the overly-intense smiling directly at the camera, during *any* type of sexual engagement. Smiling is nice, but um....eh, just a thought.

p0rn is starting to be like WWE wrestling, 100% completely fake.

It must all be about making money these days, and the latest fetish.

Long live retro and classic women.

[xcruciusx2]

I hate wimpy cumshots and fake moaning

[zarinafan]

Mine:

1- obsession with closeup shots of penetration. I don't see why these are so ubiquitous, especially in older porn flicks. Men are more turned on by the curves of a woman's body, and seeing them in action, than 55minutes worth of nothing but genitalia on the screen.

2- dribblers. Nothing is more of a let-down than when there's a smoking hot scene, well filmed, with good angles, lighting, sound, and style, with a top-notch actress who is giving an A+ performance, and some omnipresent male "talent" like TT Boy or Tony Tedeschi ruins it with a weak/dribbler cumshot.

[pornagrafer]

I would have to say that lack of full body shots on hot stars. For example, the director may have Angel, Lana Burner, Christy, or Anna Ventura and all we see is a close-up of there face or gentials, and the man's ass. I found that older Euro films do a better job.

I found that some scenes, keeping the shoes on adds to the scene. I also like partial clothing, again, depending on the scene. I rather don't like when the scene is supposedly in a risky venue (closet, stairwell, kitchen, etc.) and both performers completely disrobe prior to having sex.

However, the biggest peeve is a film containing a star (like Christy) and we get one lame scene (sometimes it is just a lez). That is a waste of talent.

[doyle]

Poor lighting! Remember "Bad Girls"? There was a scene that could have been twice as good if only the idiots had lit it better. I've noticed this a lot, even during the so called Golden Era. Either it looked like an episode of X Files it was so murky, or it was blasted with light, and any sense of realism was ruined.

[margib]

As I may have mentioned in the past, what seems to be missing from modern films is the erotic aspect. What is erotic to one person though is sometimes a turn off to someone else, but I get the strong feeling that films are made to a formula which excludes the intended viewer - and that applies to mainstream as well as pornography. Take for example the original 1936 version of King Kong - limited by the technology of the day, but reeking with atmosphere and the sheer erotic charge of the Beauty and The Beast. The latest versions are, imho, overlong and overly effects dependant.

Getting back to erotica though, my turn offs are:

Long plastic claw type nails on the women.
The gross spitting of lubrication in deep throating - in fact, any spitting at all.
Silicone and tattoos.
Those stupid, americanised bondage shoes with heels about 10 inches tall and soles so thick that the wearer looks as if she is in surgical boots.
The total lack of any of the normal foreplay that men and women usually indulge in when getting together. The man says hello and she immediately gets on with fellatio.

This is why I never watch modern porn: I happen to like erotica, and it need not be too explicit. In fact a simple glimpse of a woman's nakedness for a very short time can be very exciting, whereas twenty minutes of pounding is just like watching a butcher at work in his shop!

But there again, I am old fashioned enough to love material from the 1930s to the early 1960s. Erotica was lost as far as I am concerned when porn became an industry.

Margib (a very grumpy old man!)

[palomino]

Originally Posted by margib

Those stupid, americanised bondage shoes with heels about 10 inches tall and soles so thick that the wearer looks as if she is in surgical boots.

Thank you a lot for this; I'm not alone with this opinion...!
Seeing all this clonky shoe-wear in the flicks often makes me think, that 'Pleaser' and other producers of this kind of shoes have some kind of exclusive contract with the porn-industry !!!
This shoes make otherwise pretty girls look like cows on the meadow, shuffling their hoofs !!
But I don't have any special affection to farm-yard-stuff ect. !!!

But with this shoes it seems to be like it was with Coca-cola and Hoola-Hoop: If it's american, it will soon be copied in Europe...!!!

Baaahhh !

[vvn]

I can't stand stoopid wannabe SoCal girls mewling emptily like female David Sanborns.

[Kinghenry]

Porn kissing, you know, like you see in CeeCee loops. The actors are talking and then all of a sudden their sticking their toungues out at eachother. I realize they had to play to the camera, but it seems like they could've thrown eachother an actual kiss every now and then. I remember when I saw my first porn clip....I was totally dumbfounded by this open air toungue-licking thing....I tried it on my girl (thinking this is what your supposed to do) and she just about kicked me out of the bed!

[Joey101]

It's got to be the cutting from close ups of penetration to the girls face and then back again so you have no idea whether it's her taking it up the ass for real or not. How difficult is it to pan around from the action to the girls face at least once to confirm it's for real. Worst offender is a movie I mail ordered from the US "Vicca's out of Control" basically because I knew it had a Vicca dp. It looked as though it was directed and edited by Ray Charles and was totally ruined. This is one of the reasons why gonzo rules!