Stupid movie cliches and impossibilities

[jomama]

They never checked to make sure the killer is really dead. Drive a hatchet into their head a few times before walking away

The car never seems to start when they are trying to escape yet they never had any problems with it before

They hide somewhere obvious so the killer can find them

They can't hide quietly

They find a old run down house and ask if there is a working phone in it

Authorities are as worthless as a tits on a boar. Okay that part is believable

[Reclaimedwg]

This is one that annoys me and we see it in almost every movie or a TV episode of some crime drama.

Someone sitting outside a building or a home in a vehicle, watching someone.

Could be the bad guys tailing the good guys or the good guys tailing the bad guys.

So the people who are being surveilled walk out of the home or building and get into their own vehicle and they don't notice a vehicle with occupants in them that is parked only 15 feet away?

Then as soon as they start driving, that vehicle starts driving too following them?

Especially if the folks people followed are the main character of the movie or TV show and they usually are cops or spies or Federal agents but their awareness sucks.

They don't look in the rearview mirror and notice anything.

I drive down the road daily and I constantly look in the rearview mirrow not because I think I am being followed, but for driving safety.

Sometimes you see an idiot come up behind you at high speed and you have to get into the other lane or risk being ran over.

[jomama]

Originally Posted by wildtig2013

So the people who are being surveilled walk out of the home or building and get into their own vehicle and they don't notice a vehicle with occupants in them that is parked only 15 feet away?

That reminded me of Silence of The Lambs when Buffalo Bill posed as a man with a broken arm who needed help moving a sofa or chair into the back of his van outside her apartment building. Catherine who had no idea who he was had come to assist him.

[scoundrel]

I learned from this film that during a night in Paris, one can attend a slave auction, overpower and kill a torturer and three henchmen; kill a buyer; kill his chauffeur; drive his car along the Seine on the wrong side of the road for about four kilometres; jump about ten metres from a bridge onto the deck of a private yacht, slay nine heavily armed men on the yacht, pick off an Arab sheikh who is using your kidnapped daughter as a human shield and then nip off to the airport and fly straight to the USA.

At no stage will the French police become curious about your activities.

[Sir Honkers]

If you discover a hole in your basement floor that's leads to a dimension of pure terror, then

a: close it with a wooden trapdoor.
b: secure said trapdoor with six padlocks
c: don't put up any warnings telling people to stay away
d: don't destroy the keys but leave them lying around for any noob to discover

if you find said portal then
e: easily find keys and unlock it
f: when you realise it's a portal to a dimension of pure terror shut the trapdoor
g: don't use the padlocks to secure it
h: push an armchair on it
i: don't tell anyone especially a responsible adult

[gmcbee]

Said it once, I'll say it again:

It's nice to see this thread still kickin' after... ten years...

Quite an honor (honour, for you Limeys and Canucks and Kiwis and Bogans.) Thank you all.

Makes my day.

My pet peeve for the day, can't even remember the movie, there have been a dozen of them... Army Colonel recruits a ragtag bunch of middle school dropouts, and in a half hour, turns them into Rangers, Spetznaz, Mossad, and said children proceed to save the world from aliens just in the nick of time. Yeah, ok.

[Lurk_D]

Well, who was the idiot that said "You go with the army you have"?

[Sir Honkers]

That three people can live in a concrete fallout shelter twenty metres long and two wide for a year and not go batshit crazy and kill each other.

[KingKeigh]

Probably already mentioned but don't these movie and tv characters ever go take a shit? It's like it only happens in National Lampoon and other broad, slapstick movies. I guess drama and action characters just absorb their waste, even when their captured. James Bond doesn't shit?

And they only ever go take a piss as part of the plot of getting caught with their pants down or some other plot change. And speaking pf pissing, why is it that these new directors feel the need to show women on the toilet pissing and wiping now?

Why is it that Bond or Ethan Hunt can be in captivity for days and not even grow a five o"clock shadow? Not even an two o'clock shadow. I think I've only ever seen Pierce Brosnan's Bond grow a full beard after being captured by the Chinese for a few months but that's a rarity.

And don't even get me started on time travel movies where the protagonist goes back in time and during the adventure, hops in the sack with a 12 century harlot long before peniciln was discovered. Are we supposed to believe she's a virgin or this guy carries condoms whenever he's time jumping? Shit, soap was barely an option for aristocrats in the 1100s. Imagine the smell of the peasant girls back then. And the breath uhg...

[HugoHackenbush]

Originally Posted by KingKeigh

Why is it that Bond or Ethan Hunt can be in captivity for days and not even grow a five o"clock shadow? Not even an two o'clock shadow. I think I've only ever seen Pierce Brosnan's Bond grow a full beard after being captured by the Chinese for a few months but that's a rarity.

Actually, in "Goldfinger", when Bond is captured and wakes up on Goldfinger's jet, he has a five o'clock shadow. The very next scene is of him shaving while Goldfinger's hench-girl tries to spy on him.

Also, in "Skyfall" Eve shaves Bond with a straight razor.