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Old 12-24-2016, 04:56 PM   #12201
captpike
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Old 12-26-2016, 04:52 AM   #12202
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Why did the drug addict choose Boxing Day to kick the habit?

He wanted to go cold turkey.
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Old 12-26-2016, 02:29 PM   #12203
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ISIS Awards Night:
The 2016 best suicide bomber award goes to Mohammed. Unfortunately, Mohammed can't be with us tonight.
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Old 12-26-2016, 02:34 PM   #12204
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Almero View Post
ISIS Awards Night:
The 2016 best suicide bomber award goes to Mohammed. Unfortunately, Mohammed can't be with us tonight.
What a great night that was. The whole went with a bang.
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Old 12-27-2016, 12:45 PM   #12205
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December 27th, 363 days till Christmas and the bloody neighbours have got their decorations up already!!!!
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Old 12-27-2016, 01:42 PM   #12206
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Four Irishmen died yesterday: two of them were murdered, and the other two died during the reconstruction of the scene.
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Old 12-28-2016, 12:06 AM   #12207
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A man at the lumber yard accidentally shears off his fingers.He runs to the hospital, where the Doctor says, "give me the fingers and I'll see what I can do."The man replies, "I haven't got the fingers."The Doctor says, "what do you mean, you haven't got the fingers? We could have done microsurgery. I could have sewn them back on. Why on Earth didn't you bring the fingers?"The man replies, "I couldn't fucking pick them up!"
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Old 12-28-2016, 09:45 PM   #12208
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Old 12-29-2016, 03:31 PM   #12209
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Old 12-29-2016, 03:56 PM   #12210
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A couple were in a busy shopping center just after Christmas. The wife suddenly noticed that her husband was missing and as they had a lot to do, so she called him on the mobile. The wife said "Where are you, you know we have lots to do?" He said "You remember the jewelers we went into about 10 years ago, and you fell in love with that diamond necklace? I could not afford it at the time and I said that one day I would get it for you?" Little tears started to flow down her cheek and she got all choked upů "Yes, I do remember that shop." she replied. "Well I am in the bike shop next door to that."
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