December 15th, 2009, 11:19 PM | #41 |
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A desperate young spinster from Clare
Once knelt in the moonlight all bare And prayed to god for a romp on the sod A passerby answered her prayer. There was a young fellow named Cass Whose bollocks were made out of brass When they tinkled together They played "Stormy Weather" And lightning shot out of his ass There was a young lady named Jeannie Whose Dad was a terrible meanie He fashioned a hatch And a latch for her snatch She could only be had by Houdini There's a wonderful family called Stein There's Gert, There's Ep, And there's Ein. Gert's poems are bunk Eps Statues are junk And no-one can understand Ein. There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man And as for the bucket, Nantucket. But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, The man and the girl with the bucket; And he said to the man, He was welcome to Nan, But as for the bucket, Pawtucket. Then the pair followed Pa to Manhasset, Where he still held the cash as an asset, But Nan and the man Stole the money and ran, And as for the bucket, Manhasset. Of this story we hear from Nantucket, About the mysterious loss of a bucket, We are sorry for Nan, As well as the man— The cash and the bucket, Pawtucket. |
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December 18th, 2009, 06:00 AM | #42 |
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Little Miss Muffet, sat on a Tuffet
A Light bulb was stuck up her ass It woke up the spider, Who lived deep inside her, He said, hey, free electric and gas
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December 19th, 2009, 03:31 AM | #43 |
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Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater
whacked off in the movie theater. Sprayed his load across the screen and ruined Titanics final scene
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December 22nd, 2009, 07:14 PM | #44 |
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From Mayfair 40th Anniversary Issue, I don't know when it was from originally. Here it is again, Our drum majorettes are the best. They march whilst getting undressed. And what do they play As they're stripping away? Air on a G-string? You guessed! Last edited by nopar king; May 9th, 2010 at 12:44 PM.. Reason: removing obfuscation |
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December 25th, 2009, 01:23 PM | #45 |
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Three more from MF 40th, "Gentlemen, that reminds me..." sadly no illustrations with these ones.
There was a young actress named Ransom Who was raped seven times in a hansom When she clamoured for more Came a voice from the floor, 'The name, ma'am, is Simpson-not Samson' A young woman got married at Chester, Her mother she kissed and she blessed her. Says she 'You're in luck, He's a stunning good fuck, I had him myself down in Leicester.' There was a young fellow of Cork Who couldn't get his bladder to work. He at last freed his organ From its terrible burden, By piercing the end with a fork.
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5 out of 6 people who read this wondered why they had bothered. Last edited by nopar king; December 5th, 2011 at 08:41 PM.. |
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January 2nd, 2010, 03:55 PM | #46 |
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There was a young man from Kent
Whose tool was exceedingly bent To save himself trouble He put it in double And instead of coming,He went
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January 4th, 2010, 01:02 PM | #47 |
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Rock-a- bye baby
On the tree top Your mothers a whore I aint your Pop
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January 6th, 2010, 04:59 PM | #48 |
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OK this ones not great, can anyone do any better?
If you were an adult performer, In films that were hot not just warmer, Try Vintage Erotica Forum, And see an old pic of your bum, We like it, it goes down a stormer.
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January 6th, 2010, 05:52 PM | #49 |
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While Titian was mixing rose madder,
His model posed nude on a ladder. Her position, to Titian, Suggested coition So he climbed up the ladder and 'ad 'er! |
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January 8th, 2010, 06:22 PM | #50 |
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Old Man Named Post
There once was an old man named Post
Who spread TNT on his toast They found his eyeglasses Up some Thai twins asses And his moustache on Ivory Coast. |
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