Post your corny jokes - Page 1388

MaxJoker · September 23rd, 2018, 04:40 PM

Whoever said laughter is the best medicine ,

Clearly hasn’t tried curing chronic diarrhea with a tickle fight.

MaxJoker · September 24th, 2018, 03:20 PM

Support Feudalism ,

It's your Count who votes .

**trailmaster** · September 24th, 2018, 09:49 PM

When I was a teenager, I used to pray every night that the girl next door would fancy me so that I could make love to her. When I grew up, I realised that God didn't work like that, so I raped her and prayed for forgiveness.

Why is a bible like a penis?
You get it forced down your throat by a priest.

We call our grandad "Spiderman".
He hasn't got any super powers-he just finds it difficult to get out of the bath.

British weather: it's just like a Muslim, Sunni or Shi ite.

Mudmonster · September 25th, 2018, 08:24 PM

Apologies in advance for this.

What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?

A Labracadabrador.

**ball7** · September 25th, 2018, 09:05 PM

Italians are fantastic people, really.
They can work you over in an alley
while singing an opera.
-Don Rickles

**mrfixit** · September 25th, 2018, 11:35 PM

This addiction to sandpaper is really wearing me down

MaxJoker · September 26th, 2018, 02:10 PM

Can usually tell if someone is judgemental ,

Just by looking at them.

SKP · September 28th, 2018, 09:27 AM

Q/ why do women wear make-up and perfume ?
.

.

A/ because they're ugly and they stink .

SKP · September 28th, 2018, 09:30 AM

My wife accused me of being a cross dresser . .
I got so mad I packed her clothes and left .

SKP · September 28th, 2018, 09:31 AM

Guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. He sees a jar full of $100s and asks about it. Bartender says, "It's a manhood test. Put in your $100 and if you can pass all three tests all the money is yours. Test one, knock out the bouncer with one punch. Test two, go out back and pull the infected tooth from our pitbull's mouth. Test three, go upstairs and sexually satisfy this old hooker; she's never been satisfied." Guy slams his beer, puts his $100 in the jar and walks over to the bouncer and BOOM!! Bouncer's down... Guy slams another three beers and heads out back. They can hear dog barking and growling and the guy is yelling and screaming. There's things being broken and just general mayhem and destruction. Guy walks back in the bar and he is torn up and bleeding from head to toe. He slams another beer and asks, "OK, where's the hooker with the infected tooth ?"

September 23rd, 2018, 04:40 PM	#13871
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,404 Times in 69,067 Posts	Whoever said laughter is the best medicine , Clearly hasn’t tried curing chronic diarrhea with a tickle fight. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

September 24th, 2018, 03:20 PM	#13872
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,404 Times in 69,067 Posts	Support Feudalism , It's your Count who votes . __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

September 25th, 2018, 11:35 PM	#13876
mrfixit Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Elm Street Posts: 9,401 Thanks: 165,736 Thanked 114,766 Times in 9,415 Posts	This addiction to sandpaper is really wearing me down __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?

September 26th, 2018, 02:10 PM	#13877
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,404 Times in 69,067 Posts	Can usually tell if someone is judgemental , Just by looking at them. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

September 28th, 2018, 09:27 AM	#13878
SKP Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2018 Posts: 3 Thanks: 4 Thanked 42 Times in 3 Posts	yolk Q/ why do women wear make-up and perfume ? . . A/ because they're ugly and they stink .

September 24th, 2018, 09:49 PM	#13873
trailmaster Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Chicago, Illinois, USA Posts: 59,878 Thanks: 1,328,847 Thanked 707,028 Times in 60,052 Posts	When I was a teenager, I used to pray every night that the girl next door would fancy me so that I could make love to her. When I grew up, I realised that God didn't work like that, so I raped her and prayed for forgiveness. Why is a bible like a penis? You get it forced down your throat by a priest. We call our grandad "Spiderman". He hasn't got any super powers-he just finds it difficult to get out of the bath. British weather: it's just like a Muslim, Sunni or Shi ite.

September 25th, 2018, 08:24 PM	#13874
Mudmonster Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2012 Posts: 319 Thanks: 156,323 Thanked 7,127 Times in 319 Posts	Apologies in advance for this. What do you call a dog that does magic tricks? A Labracadabrador.

September 25th, 2018, 09:05 PM	#13875
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,687 Thanks: 66,267 Thanked 209,956 Times in 15,727 Posts	Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera. -Don Rickles

September 28th, 2018, 09:30 AM	#13879
SKP Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2018 Posts: 3 Thanks: 4 Thanked 42 Times in 3 Posts	angry dress My wife accused me of being a cross dresser . . I got so mad I packed her clothes and left .

September 28th, 2018, 09:31 AM	#13880
SKP Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2018 Posts: 3 Thanks: 4 Thanked 42 Times in 3 Posts	dog toof Guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. He sees a jar full of $100s and asks about it. Bartender says, "It's a manhood test. Put in your $100 and if you can pass all three tests all the money is yours. Test one, knock out the bouncer with one punch. Test two, go out back and pull the infected tooth from our pitbull's mouth. Test three, go upstairs and sexually satisfy this old hooker; she's never been satisfied." Guy slams his beer, puts his $100 in the jar and walks over to the bouncer and BOOM!! Bouncer's down... Guy slams another three beers and heads out back. They can hear dog barking and growling and the guy is yelling and screaming. There's things being broken and just general mayhem and destruction. Guy walks back in the bar and he is torn up and bleeding from head to toe. He slams another beer and asks, "OK, where's the hooker with the infected tooth ?"

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