April 19th, 2024, 12:10 AM | #7951 |
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''When you don't know what you're living for, you don't care how you live from one day to the next. You're happy the day has passed and the night has come, and in your sleep you bury the tedious question of what you lived for that day and what you're going to live for tomorrow.''
Oblomov - Ivan Goncharov |
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April 20th, 2024, 02:24 AM | #7952 |
Lean Mean Screencap Machine
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https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/15...d785ad7&ei=146
15 Rita Mae Brown Says Statistically Speaking, You’re the Crazy One “The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re okay, then it’s you.” -------------------- 14 Robert Benchley Asks: Who Rescued Whomst? “A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.” -------------------- 13 Oscar Wilde, God-Tier Nudge “Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.” -------------------- 12 Dorothy Parker Says Only the Good Die Poor “If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at the people he gave it to.” -------------------- 11 Quentin Crisp Says Be the Jones You Want to See in the World “Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level. It’s cheaper.” -------------------- 10 Andy Field on Meal Prep “Planning meals in advance, now that’s some food forethought.” -------------------- 9 Izzy Mant on the Addictive Nature of Literature “They say some people ‘inhale books.’ I know someone who injects books right into his veins. Particularly ones with female protagonists. He’s a heroine addict.” -------------------- 8 Ian Smith on the Only Union-Proof Industry “I bet there’s never any workers’ strikes at a stress-ball factory.” -------------------- 7 Andy Field Loves His Friends Unconditionally (Some Conditions Apply) “I tell my friends, I’m here for them 24/7 because it sounds better than saying I’m only here for them on the 24th of July.” -------------------- 6 Jake Lambert, Cowboy’s Apprentice “A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, ‘Yes, of course. That’s 20 cows.’” -------------------- 5 Cam Spence’s Hard-Earned Dad Bod “I’m pleased to be getting a beer belly. I’ve always wanted a father figure.” -------------------- 4 Doug Larson Knows Sometimes Your Best Friend Is Your Biggest Detractor “The cat could very well be man’s best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.” -------------------- 3 Joan Rivers on Fortune’s Locksmith “People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.” -------------------- 2 G.K. Chesterton Clearly Has Made an Enemy in His HOA “The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies. Probably because they’re generally the same people.” -------------------- 1 Mark Twain Says Keep Your Broke Friends at Bay “The holy passion of friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime — if not asked to lend money.”
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April 20th, 2024, 06:58 AM | #7953 |
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Apology for Tony Blackburn
Someone burgled me last night and stole all my trophies for limbo dancing. How low can you get?
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But then again, I am a complete moron |
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April 20th, 2024, 06:09 PM | #7954 |
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“Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.”
Hogfather - Terry Pratchett |
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April 23rd, 2024, 08:02 AM | #7955 |
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From Frasier:
Daphne: You'd eat a worm if I gave it a French name.
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