The Woman From Hell

[easyed]

I've go to be honest guys, I don,t see the point. I'ver been married and don't plan to do it any time soon. I keep hearing about the long happy marriages but I'm not witnessing many of them. Most of my friends are now single also but a few have a reasonable decent thing going with their wives. Most of my truely happy friends are truely single.

I just lost 150lbs of gripey, bitchy dead weight. Her personal life was a train wreck but she sure had a lot of advise for my happiness. I problem is, I'm happy. Happier without her nagging me. I've managed to keep all my money too. The problem is, I might have to find a hooker pretty soon.

[USBPepsi]

When you're happy, you're happy. When you aren't, you aren't. And when you meet a woman who makes you happy, suddenly marriage can make sense.

I don't believe all marriages can work, but I also don't believe that marriage is a waste of effort. When the right people meet each other it just clicks.

[rustler]

Originally Posted by polartrade

And when you meet a woman who makes you happy, suddenly marriage can make sense.

When the right people meet each other it just clicks.

Absolutely! My parents met by chance in the street, took one look at each other and just knew that they had found the right one. They didn't even speak the same language!! My grandfather had to translate everything for them, which must have been hilarious, not to mention embarrassing!
They were married three months later, still not speaking each others language! They were very happilly married for 52 years, and died, perhaps not surprisingly, just a month apart.

It can happen!

[Rick Danger]

Man, this is an interesting thread. Scary, but interesting.

I've been married sixteen plus years. She's my first, I'm her second mistake. No kids. It's been OK; the wife is a superb cook and has a great sense of humor. Plus she's been buying me beer the last year. On the down side, she doesn't give head, but on the other hand sex and marriage are mutually exclusive terms. Plus she's a professional ball buster. But she's mellowing with age.

Would I get married again ? Probably not. Got married two clicks shy of 40. I'm pretty sure if I got married younger it would have been a disaster. But I entered into this union with the idea that I'm doing this once. And I'm staying off Face Book. I have enough headaches without having some old girlfriend with three or four kids looking me up.

Which brings me to another question: What's with these woman who treated you like you had the plague back in the day only to show up years later with a big smile and a couple of kids in tow acting like you're their long lost love ? Sorry, there's no "S" in my name; i.e., you can't spell "S-U-C-K-E-R" with my name.

I guess I thought things were different in the UK. That's why here in the Colonies we love to say "every man sings the Blues......"

"Who can understand the way of Gods ? They create lovely girls and then turn them into wives !" - Samos the Goatherder in The 300 Spartans

[Brecht]

Some quite amusing but also sad stories here. Fortunately, I have none to offer. If you ask me, the notion of marriage is pretty much unnatural. People are too different and marriage is, well, not really the right way to live those differences. Its most purpose is social benefit but also turns out as someone's ruin. If you like someone and works, good for you, if it doesn't, shake hands and say goodbye. You don't have to bound yourself in front of the law. I refuse to depend on someone's moods or on what might happen.
I'm 26 years old and you might blame me for being less experienced or too young but I had some crazy girlfriends myself. When I was 21 or 22, two of them were pretty serious about getting kids. Most of you married guys are probably no fans of marriage either but had to compromise to keep the woman you love. It's an old trap but that's nothing for me and I'm going to spare myself the trouble for a long time. A couple of my friends are already married and it's not working out well for them. Live free as long as you can and don't let anyone to push you around.

[monogroover]

I dated a Japanese woman in the '90s, a lawyer. I'll call her "Kaori", though that wasn't her name. She was actually a quite charming woman most of the time, albeit occasionally a terrible, pretentious snob - she often used to wear a Sloane Ranger headband, and fancied herself part of London's upper crust.

We stopped dating after a month or two when we decided that we weren't quite right for each other. But we did remain friends and continued to sleep with each other. We had a phenomenal sexual chemistry and neither of us wanted to let that go.

Eventually Kaori started dating another guy, so we stopped having sex. I was disappointed because she was the most sexually insatiable person I've ever known and absolutely wild in bed, but all good things come to an end.

However when I met someone else myself, she suddenly became intensely possessive. She would tell me she wasn't feeling well and insisted I come round to see her when she knew I had a date with my new girlfriend. Once I'd go round to her flat then when the time came for me to leave she'd beg me to stay longer - she was genuinely upset - and when I wouldn't she'd run downstairs and lock the door so I couldn't leave. I got her to open it by shouting at her to let me leave - I knew Kaori couldn't tolerate the neighbours hearing a disturbance.

By this time she was regularly calling me twenty or thirty times a night. I'd already changed my number once, but she'd found the new number somehow - I'll never know how. The first time she called it she claimed it was a wrong number. She had a friend in that part of London, Kaori said, and she'd mis-dialled the number and got me instead. Sometimes she'd make silent calls, putting down the receiver as soon as I'd picked up. She only admitted that those were her after I told her I'd had BT's nuisance calls unit trace the line, so I could report it to the police. She begged me not to - as a lawyer, she'd lose her job, and with it her right to remain in the UK.

She told me that she was expecting my child, which I didn't believe for a moment of course. She begged me again to go and see her, and like a mug, I did. I really felt sorry for her and she was genuinely upset. Once again when the time came for me to leave - I'd only promised to go round there for an hour, and I'd been there for about three, just talking to her, letting her talk at me - she wouldn't let me leave.

She wrestled me all the way to the top of the stairs, clinging onto me. I was quite angry by this time and trying to shake her off. At the top of the stairs, Kaori stumbled - then I saw her look down the stairs, and saw an idea flicker into her eyes. She threw herself down the stairs. I've never seen anything like it. I was genuinely frightened, not only by the spectacle of someone I cared about tumbling down a steep flight of stairs but the fact that she was prepared to do that to herself. She appeared to be unconscious at the bottom of the stairs. But I could tell she was pretending, and I had to get out of there. I left.

The next day she called me and said that I'd pushed her down the stairs, and that she'd suffered a miscarriage. "You've killed my baby", she shouted. Several times.

I went to see her one more time - I know, typing this out it seems crazy to me too, but she promised me she'd behave - and of course there was a wrestling match again when I wanted to leave. This time I succeeded in fighting my way to the car, but she managed somehow to close the car door with my keys in it so I was locked out of it. I called the AA, and they came and unlocked it for me while I stood outside - I refused to go back in her flat.

Once again, Kaori tried to prevent me leaving. She insisted that I kissed her goodnight, wouldn't let go of the car door. But I knew it was part of one more plan to stop me going home. So I set off walking along the street where she lived, as though I was going to get a taxi. She followed me of course, but after a minute I ran back to the car.

I was safely inside with the door locked and about to turn the key in the ignition when she caught me up.

But the prospect of being defeated was too much for her. She removed her shoe, and determinedly started to hammer the driver side window with it. I pushed my hand against the glass to support it, but she shifted her aim. On the third attempt she very deliberately managed to smash the car window to smithereens. She then burst into tears, and ran into her flat.

I pulled a sliver of glass out of my forehead and drove home with blood running down my face, covered in shards of broken window. I felt a little traumatised. Of course I had a massive "I told you so" lecture from my new girlfriend when I called her later and told her what had happened.

As it turned out, that was the last time I ever saw Kaori. The next morning she called me, apologised tearfully and offered to pay for the window. She was calm. She finally accepted it would be best if we just didn't see each other again. I told her to forget about the window, and assured her that I hadn't called the police.

And you know what? I missed her. We'd been close. I wish we could have remained friends. A great shame that things turned out like that.

[Brecht]

I have to say that I looked like Mr. Spock in your avatar after reading your story. It's like one of those crazy tv dramas with Jane Seymour.

[USBPepsi]

Originally Posted by rustler

Absolutely! My parents met by chance in the street, took one look at each other and just knew that they had found the right one. They didn't even speak the same language!! My grandfather had to translate everything for them, which must have been hilarious, not to mention embarrassing!
They were married three months later, still not speaking each others language! They were very happilly married for 52 years, and died, perhaps not surprisingly, just a month apart.

It can happen!

Wow, what a story.

I must admit, I'd never have the courage to date a girl if I couldn't speak her language.

[USBPepsi]

Originally Posted by Rick Danger

Which brings me to another question: What's with these woman who treated you like you had the plague back in the day only to show up years later with a big smile and a couple of kids in tow acting like you're their long lost love ? Sorry, there's no "S" in my name; i.e., you can't spell "S-U-C-K-E-R" with my name.

I'm pretty sure I've never had an old acquaintance try to manipulate me that way. What has happened a lot, though, is having women pop up and admit that they were attracted to me a long time ago, but never had the courage to show it.

The problem is, when I was younger I was also painfully shy. As a result, I often missed signals that girls (or women, later on; I stayed shy until I was almost thirty) were giving me. I would see something that seemed like encouragement, but then say to myself, "Nahhh, she'd never be interested in me."

Three or four times I found out, years later, that a really attractive, or really cute, or really funny, girl had actually wanted to get together with me, but neither of us had the guts to make a move. The worst case was a girl who I briefly worked with in the "fast food business", back in the days right after I'd finished college and was desperate for a quick paycheck (you don't see many want ads that say "English Major Wanted", you see).

This girl was a real cutie, laughed at all my stories, would sit for hours after closing time and talk with me... In other words, I should have KNOWN she liked me. But I was 21 then, and she was 17, and I thought I should behave myself. Plus, of course, I still wasn't convinced that such a cute girl would be interested in me... I should have just gone for it; in this small town in which I was working, most of the teens were sexually active, to make a major understatement... but I wanted to be a gentleman. By the time she became "legal", alas, I had changed jobs and moved on. We lost touch, as people do, before I could make my move.

Then, over the next few years, I repeatedly ran across people who would tell me that this girl had always wanted me BIG TIME. First a cashier at a convenience store, who used to work with us. "Dude, why didn't you HIT that? She would have been all over you! She talked about you all the time!" Then a friend of hers who I had gone out with a couple times. "Oh, yeah, she was always going on about you. You should have asked her out, instead of me. I mean, we had a good time every now and then, but I think she was in love with you."

The worst, though, was when I was renting movies at a Blockbuster, about fifty miles away from the town in which I'd worked with the girl. This kid at the counter (kid to me, anyway; by then I was about 25) looked at my membership card, then said, "Are you the _____ _______ that used to work with ______? She worked here last year. Man, she couldn't stop talking about you. She said you were the only reason she didn't quit that job."

Of course, it took me about another six months to track this girl down, in hopes of making it look like I was just "bumping into her" (keep in mind this was pre-internet, so finding people was then a lot harder). When I did finally find her, she was still cute, still funny... and married and pregnant.

STUPID, STUPID!!!

[otokonomidori]

I don't think I would get married again.

I had a pretty pleasant 28 years all things considered - she never told me what to do or nagged me and I didn't boss her about and never beat her up. She didn't care if the house was clean and preferred reading to shopping.

We were usually in agreement on most things and kept our mouths shut when we weren't.

So I reckon I won't get that lucky twice - and anyway I'm not interested in some horrible saggy old bint with loser sub-normal criminal children and a prolapsed uterus which is about all you're likely to get at my age unless you win the lottery.

No, once is enough for me