Are You The Typical Bloke ?

[tygrkhat40]

Originally Posted by whop

Second, I hate BBQ. I prefer my food cooked, not half burnt half raw.

If you're getting BBQ like that, whoever's trying to serve that up should be shot. No, shooting's too quick, string him up.

[gtos4ever]

Originally Posted by tygrkhat40

If you're getting BBQ like that, whoever's trying to serve that up should be shot. No, shooting's too quick, string him up.

Or to quote Buford T. Justice, "BarBQ his ass in molasses".

[MaxJoker]

I`m greedy and much prefer takeout to eating something that`ll prolong my life , i love chocolate , i like my beer, and the remote to always be within arms length. I love films , preferably horror ones or actions ones. I don`t enjoy socializing at shindigs , going to dinner parties or making small talk with people i don`t know . Am more happy in jeans and a far too young for me childishly designed t-shirt than in a suit . Can`t stand musicals or anything effeminate unless it`s a woman . I don`t have much patience with any noise i myself am not making . I take offense at things not directed at me . When i lose my temper i punch inanimate objects. I tend to speak my mind at lot , never more so when i`m out of it .

Guess that makes me a typical bloke alright

[MaxJoker]

Originally Posted by Estreeter

Are You The Typical Bloke ?

What you mean on here

Nope, as i`ve had sex , with somebody other than myself

Originally Posted by Estreeter

I think quite a few members here could be classed as a typical male, the sort that females complain about, maybe even driven some to become lesbians

Hey that was just a slanderous rumour

Albeit it one repeated a few dozen times by several hundred now gay women

Originally Posted by Estreeter

Is the TV remote exclusively yours ?

What are you a fan of the Village People or something

Of course it`s mine !.

In fact i`m so close to it the things mentioned in my will, so i`m buried with it

Originally Posted by Estreeter

Do you have a fridge dedicated to beer ?

No i have a brewery, plus having bribed the manager with an offer he couldn`t refuse ( I threatened to make him a Mod here ) , a skeleton key.

Originally Posted by Estreeter

Unless drunk, do you do all the driving ?

I`ll answer that, as soon as i`m ever sober enough to work out how everybody around me seems to be a blurry twin

Let alone understand what a car is ? ,or be able to hold it`s key in my booze addled hand

Now please excuse me while i stagger to the kerb, then slur onto the pavement and pass out into a two week coma

[Estreeter]

Originally Posted by MaxJoker

What you mean on here

Well, I guess I am, I plain forgot I even started this thread

Originally Posted by MaxJoker

What are you a fan of the Village People or something

I tried too be

But gave myself this advise when I heard a Village People cover band were playin' in my hometown

[edgarcasey]

When you say "typical bloke", you're referring to a type A, uber-heterosexual, I-wear-the-pants-around-here asserting, TV remote holding, scrap-iron-for-breakfast eating kinda manly man, no?

Honestly, I really can't figure out how to label myself. On the one hand, I'm totally straight. (In fact, my entire life has revolved around a seemingly unending quest for lush hairy cunt, because, sadly, no matter how successful I am with regard to such endeavors, I can never seem to get quite enough. That shit's gotta stop. But I digress.) I'm real into American football (NFL). Like MJ, I'm far more comfortable in a t-shirt and ragged shorts or sweatpants than a suit. My diet is horrendous as well.

Yet, on the other hand, I am among the ten percent of men who lack the car gene. No interest in cars at all. Can't tell the carburetor from the radiator. Never felt a need for speed. With regard to music, I gravitate primarily to classical, romantic, jazz...even opera. I love Yes and Zeppelin, but I love The Carpenters, too, no question. When it comes to films, I'm sick of all these action flicks by now. They all look absolutely identical to me. Throw a macho man or three on the poster, alongside some guns, and a bunch of shit blowing up. I have zero interest in any of that anymore. At this point, I would find something that involved people struggling with real life circumstances, personal relationships and the like far more compelling. And, to top it off, I'm just incredibly jealous and emotional and sensitive - no doubt more like a woman than a man, which makes me rather pathetic indeed.

[Pinkpapercut]

I lack the car gene, I lack the sports gene, I enjoy classical music and musicals, I love poetry, I don't drink never mind devote the fridge entirely to beer, on almost every level except being attracted to women you might take me for a giant flaming fairy.

On the other hand I'm sitting here looking at a porn forum while eating cold chilli from the can, so I have to admit that deep down, yes, I am the typical bloke.