"Temporary Wife" on business trip: good idea? - Page 2

Dirty Old Man · October 10th, 2010, 02:50 PM

how will you feel if you come home early and run into your wifes temporary husband?
fair is fair after all.

**DTravel** · October 10th, 2010, 06:32 PM

Scoobey1, forgive me if this is too serious or intrusive but from the way you phrase it I get the feeling there are some problems in your marriage that the two of you need to work out.

As for a "temporary" second wife, I don't think it would be as simple or no strings as you do. Even if you and this "temporary wife" both really did understand it as being no-strings, no commitment, no attachment when you went in to it that doesn't mean that both of you would feel the same when it was time to end it. Plus the fact that you want to hide this from your legal wife.... That just sets off all kinds of warning bells in my head.

Do you plan to tell any of your co-workers about this "temporary wife" arrangement? Any of your friends? If not, why not? If yes, why not tell your real wife? Now I grant I don't know you or your wife but with most people the fact that they would want to hide this is a pretty good indication that either they don't think its a good idea or know that the people around them would think its not a good idea and would think less of the person doing it. (Which makes it pretty much a bad idea for that person.)

**buttsie** · October 10th, 2010, 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by billybunter

Remember guys "rubber up"

but dont go overboard

safe sex love scene
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YFC0O393DQ

Scoobey1 · October 23rd, 2010, 05:48 PM

I appreciate everyone's feedback. To be honest, I was surprised at how few folks said "go for it" -- I guess the days of the businessman's fling are over! To those who suggested there is an underlying problem with my marriage: sure, yep, but not actually all that deep of one. We have a wonderful relationship, but since having kids and entering menopause my wife (who's 55; I'm 48) has lost nearly all her sex drive. She tries to be generous to me, and when we do make love she gets excited and always cums, but she never initiates sex and often is irritated by the distraction when I do so. (If we could afford to get away to a romantic hotel more often it would help!)

So where I'm coming from is that while I still try to be attractive to her, to seduce her romantically, to be tender and generous in bed, sex ultimately is something that I want much more than she wants -- so it seems to make sense for me to stop pestering her so much and just go get it from someone else, especially when I'm 1,000 miles away and in a place I'll almost certainly never return to.

But the sense of this group is "nope." And I appreciate the wisdom (and humor) in your input! Thanks again!

blatt · October 23rd, 2010, 07:01 PM

"Temporary Wife "

How and where do i get one of those

If anybody knows please let me know because the one that i have acts as though shes permanent and id really like to renegotiate the terms of our wedding vows. Mostly the terms of having to wake up to her ugly face every morning and having to listen to her boring gossip about friends of hers i could care less about

Married men live longer

Dont buy into that you lucky singles / fact is its not longer its just that every minute spent with your wife seems to stretch to a damn hour

Save yourselves stay single

**trailmaster** · July 23rd, 2016, 11:48 AM

I wouldn't do it . If by chance your wife finds out your marriage is in the toilet. And anyway doing that thing shows a kind of betrayal toward the vows you made with your wife when you first got married.

Don't do it!!!

**Sir Honkers** · July 24th, 2016, 11:35 AM

Didn't George Clooney do this in a movie?

**Slayer80** · July 24th, 2016, 11:46 AM

one question: is it worth to lose everything you have at home?

banquomerc · July 24th, 2016, 09:45 PM

yeah, you have a solid plan...you should go for it because no one ever said "there is no such thing as a free lunch"...yup, you are right on with this simple course of yours...it should work seamlessly and then after all hell breaks loose, you could contact a skilled surgeon to remove your head from your ass...just sayin'

wroyere · July 24th, 2016, 11:41 PM

Bad idea. The one variable you don't control is how the woman with whom you'll be having an affair WILL eventually begin to feel. Remember, men and women are completely different. It is impossible for a woman to have a purely sexual relationship for very long before her hypergamous nature attempts to legitimize the affair by expecting a commitment from you and becoming the NEW Mrs. Most likely, if you are somewhat attracted to each other to begin with, you will fuck, you will like it, and both of you will start to develop feelings for each other.

Mother nature does not like to be fooled. Repeated sex with the same woman releases very powerful chemicals in your heads that are designed SPECIFICALLY to make you bond together as a pair. This is that snuggly, cuddly feeling that you appear to be confusing with the same feeling you might have if you were to have a tasty meal. The difference is, this kind of snuggly feeling gets into your bloodstream and your psyche AND hers, and you are no longer able to simply push away from the table and go home. Which still leaves the unfortunate problem of a wife, who has legal access to half of everything you have, and half of everything you ever thought about making. And children who are always going to see you as the evil person who broke up their happy childhood home.

Although you as a male stand a small, slim chance of compartmentalizing this problem, it is almost an absolute certainty that the woman will eventually start to have very strong loving feelings for you. At this point, as was already alluded to, you have a Fatal Attraction on your hands. A woman in love is absolutely without reason. If you are not prepared to have a crying hysterical woman show up at your doorstep, embarrass you in front of your neighbors, possibly "out" you at work, break your kids hearts, and destroy your marriage & your life as you know it, do not do this.

Listen to what I am f****** telling you. You are f****** around with forces you don't fully understand. I know, because I did it. And I wish to God somebody had grabbed me by the shoulders and slapped me in the face. This doesn't have anything to do with whether or not you love your current spouse, or you respect her or even if you respect the institution of marriage. It is about saving YOU. It is about preserving your sanity.

What you're attempting to do is segment two different parts of your life so that one has nothing to do with the other. It doesn't work that way. Everything is connected in a man's life. If you want some strange that badly, and you are not getting enough loving contact at home, then it is time to dissolve the marriage and go your own way. An attempt to have both will leave you burned so badly, both on your soul and in court, you could never recover from it. This is not bible-thumping. This is not moralizing. I am trying to prevent you from walking across a six-lane interstate. Statistically, your chances of surviving it are almost nil.

You will hear many stories from guys who will tell you they do it every day of the world, and they are probably right. But listen to this--if they do it long, they will get busted, and the legal, social, and emotional hell isn't worth it. The only time that a large trophy deer gets killed is during the rut. It's the only time that he is not thinking straight. He take stupid chances, because he is trying to get at that doe. It's also about the same time that boy possums gets squashed into high velocity red goo on the road at night, trying to get at female possums. I would suggest you spend this time learning your own nature. Learning your own physiology. Learning the differences between men and women. They are profound. Unfortunately we have a tidal wave of feminism in pop culture trying to convince us there's no difference between men and women. But there is. A huge difference. One that will suck you down like a Vortex of misery if you don't watch out for it. You can't just put the tip in.

If you're thinking about cheating, in your mind you have already left your marriage. I sympathize with the thrill of the Chase, and The Wonder of a new pussy. The problem is, it never lasts. I hope you will think very carefully about what I had to say. It cost me one hell of a lot in tears and time and pain. Pornography is the greatest gift to man imaginable. It allows you the pleasure of watching, but none of the commitment. And in case you haven't noticed that's what a man usually is. A resource. The courts are on the women's side. If you injure one, you've entered them all. You will lose, and you will be spending the rest of your life as a slave to servicing the debt.

Or you can Avail yourself of the many fine and safe freedoms that you probably already have in your life. Buy yourself some fine Scotch, some Fine Cigars, maybe a nice new car. But don't f*** around with trying to have a temporary sex partner. If you persist, you've done it at your own Peril. This is all I have to say to you.

View Poll Results: What do you think of the "temporary relationship" idea?
Good idea, and do-able; go for it, man!	8	18.60%
Bad idea. It'll result in STDs, broken hearts, + financial ruin.	23	53.49%
Are you nuts? Women who want that exist only in films!	14	32.56%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 43. You may not vote on this poll

October 10th, 2010, 06:32 PM	#12
DTravel Lean Mean Screencap Machine Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Better you don't know. Posts: 23,807 Thanks: 10,480 Thanked 207,343 Times in 23,716 Posts	Scoobey1, forgive me if this is too serious or intrusive but from the way you phrase it I get the feeling there are some problems in your marriage that the two of you need to work out. As for a "temporary" second wife, I don't think it would be as simple or no strings as you do. Even if you and this "temporary wife" both really did understand it as being no-strings, no commitment, no attachment when you went in to it that doesn't mean that both of you would feel the same when it was time to end it. Plus the fact that you want to hide this from your legal wife.... That just sets off all kinds of warning bells in my head. Do you plan to tell any of your co-workers about this "temporary wife" arrangement? Any of your friends? If not, why not? If yes, why not tell your real wife? Now I grant I don't know you or your wife but with most people the fact that they would want to hide this is a pretty good indication that either they don't think its a good idea or know that the people around them would think its not a good idea and would think less of the person doing it. (Which makes it pretty much a bad idea for that person.) __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. I rage and weep for my country. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. I can reup screencaps, other material might have been lost.

July 24th, 2016, 11:46 AM	#18
Slayer80 Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 4,534 Thanks: 12,986 Thanked 99,231 Times in 4,509 Posts	one question: is it worth to lose everything you have at home? __________________ Links, covers or previews down? Feel free to repost them! -- Problems unpacking the file? Update winrar / 7zip! -- Request reup? Send me a PM with link to the post! *To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.*

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October 10th, 2010, 02:50 PM	#11
Dirty Old Man Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 149 Thanks: 155 Thanked 6,230 Times in 149 Posts	how will you feel if you come home early and run into your wifes temporary husband? fair is fair after all.

October 23rd, 2010, 05:48 PM	#14
Scoobey1 Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Posts: 11 Thanks: 87 Thanked 50 Times in 6 Posts	I appreciate everyone's feedback. To be honest, I was surprised at how few folks said "go for it" -- I guess the days of the businessman's fling are over! To those who suggested there is an underlying problem with my marriage: sure, yep, but not actually all that deep of one. We have a wonderful relationship, but since having kids and entering menopause my wife (who's 55; I'm 48) has lost nearly all her sex drive. She tries to be generous to me, and when we do make love she gets excited and always cums, but she never initiates sex and often is irritated by the distraction when I do so. (If we could afford to get away to a romantic hotel more often it would help!) So where I'm coming from is that while I still try to be attractive to her, to seduce her romantically, to be tender and generous in bed, sex ultimately is something that I want much more than she wants -- so it seems to make sense for me to stop pestering her so much and just go get it from someone else, especially when I'm 1,000 miles away and in a place I'll almost certainly never return to. But the sense of this group is "nope." And I appreciate the wisdom (and humor) in your input! Thanks again!

October 23rd, 2010, 07:01 PM	#15
blatt Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: South London Posts: 400 Thanks: 16,587 Thanked 5,519 Times in 398 Posts	"Temporary Wife " How and where do i get one of those If anybody knows please let me know because the one that i have acts as though shes permanent and id really like to renegotiate the terms of our wedding vows. Mostly the terms of having to wake up to her ugly face every morning and having to listen to her boring gossip about friends of hers i could care less about Married men live longer Dont buy into that you lucky singles / fact is its not longer its just that every minute spent with your wife seems to stretch to a damn hour Save yourselves stay single

July 23rd, 2016, 11:48 AM	#16
trailmaster Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Chicago, Illinois, USA Posts: 59,898 Thanks: 1,329,029 Thanked 707,254 Times in 60,072 Posts	I wouldn't do it . If by chance your wife finds out your marriage is in the toilet. And anyway doing that thing shows a kind of betrayal toward the vows you made with your wife when you first got married. Don't do it!!!

July 24th, 2016, 11:35 AM	#17
Sir Honkers Veteran Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Land Of Glorious Leader Posts: 30,350 Thanks: 286,887 Thanked 386,219 Times in 30,304 Posts	Didn't George Clooney do this in a movie?

July 24th, 2016, 09:45 PM	#19
banquomerc Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 439 Thanks: 12,924 Thanked 3,000 Times in 408 Posts	yeah, you have a solid plan...you should go for it because no one ever said "there is no such thing as a free lunch"...yup, you are right on with this simple course of yours...it should work seamlessly and then after all hell breaks loose, you could contact a skilled surgeon to remove your head from your ass...just sayin'

July 24th, 2016, 11:41 PM	#20
wroyere Member Join Date: May 2014 Location: USA Posts: 14 Thanks: 250 Thanked 117 Times in 10 Posts	Bad idea. The one variable you don't control is how the woman with whom you'll be having an affair WILL eventually begin to feel. Remember, men and women are completely different. It is impossible for a woman to have a purely sexual relationship for very long before her hypergamous nature attempts to legitimize the affair by expecting a commitment from you and becoming the NEW Mrs. Most likely, if you are somewhat attracted to each other to begin with, you will fuck, you will like it, and both of you will start to develop feelings for each other. Mother nature does not like to be fooled. Repeated sex with the same woman releases very powerful chemicals in your heads that are designed SPECIFICALLY to make you bond together as a pair. This is that snuggly, cuddly feeling that you appear to be confusing with the same feeling you might have if you were to have a tasty meal. The difference is, this kind of snuggly feeling gets into your bloodstream and your psyche AND hers, and you are no longer able to simply push away from the table and go home. Which still leaves the unfortunate problem of a wife, who has legal access to half of everything you have, and half of everything you ever thought about making. And children who are always going to see you as the evil person who broke up their happy childhood home. Although you as a male stand a small, slim chance of compartmentalizing this problem, it is almost an absolute certainty that the woman will eventually start to have very strong loving feelings for you. At this point, as was already alluded to, you have a Fatal Attraction on your hands. A woman in love is absolutely without reason. If you are not prepared to have a crying hysterical woman show up at your doorstep, embarrass you in front of your neighbors, possibly "out" you at work, break your kids hearts, and destroy your marriage & your life as you know it, do not do this. Listen to what I am f**** telling you. You are f** around with forces you don't fully understand. I know, because I did it. And I wish to God somebody had grabbed me by the shoulders and slapped me in the face. This doesn't have anything to do with whether or not you love your current spouse, or you respect her or even if you respect the institution of marriage. It is about saving YOU. It is about preserving your sanity. What you're attempting to do is segment two different parts of your life so that one has nothing to do with the other. It doesn't work that way. Everything is connected in a man's life. If you want some strange that badly, and you are not getting enough loving contact at home, then it is time to dissolve the marriage and go your own way. An attempt to have both will leave you burned so badly, both on your soul and in court, you could never recover from it. This is not bible-thumping. This is not moralizing. I am trying to prevent you from walking across a six-lane interstate. Statistically, your chances of surviving it are almost nil. You will hear many stories from guys who will tell you they do it every day of the world, and they are probably right. But listen to this--if they do it long, they will get busted, and the legal, social, and emotional hell isn't worth it. The only time that a large trophy deer gets killed is during the rut. It's the only time that he is not thinking straight. He take stupid chances, because he is trying to get at that doe. It's also about the same time that boy possums gets squashed into high velocity red goo on the road at night, trying to get at female possums. I would suggest you spend this time learning your own nature. Learning your own physiology. Learning the differences between men and women. They are profound. Unfortunately we have a tidal wave of feminism in pop culture trying to convince us there's no difference between men and women. But there is. A huge difference. One that will suck you down like a Vortex of misery if you don't watch out for it. You can't just put the tip in. If you're thinking about cheating, in your mind you have already left your marriage. I sympathize with the thrill of the Chase, and The Wonder of a new pussy. The problem is, it never lasts. I hope you will think very carefully about what I had to say. It cost me one hell of a lot in tears and time and pain. Pornography is the greatest gift to man imaginable. It allows you the pleasure of watching, but none of the commitment. And in case you haven't noticed that's what a man usually is. A resource. The courts are on the women's side. If you injure one, you've entered them all. You will lose, and you will be spending the rest of your life as a slave to servicing the debt. Or you can Avail yourself of the many fine and safe freedoms that you probably already have in your life. Buy yourself some fine Scotch, some Fine Cigars, maybe a nice new car. But don't f* around with trying to have a temporary sex partner. If you persist, you've done it at your own Peril. This is all I have to say to you.