June 13th, 2018, 03:38 PM | #571 |
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June 22nd, 2018, 05:17 PM | #572 |
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My wife yelled at me today “You’re not even bloody listening, are you ?!? ” ,
“That’s a weird way to start a conversation” I replied .
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June 24th, 2018, 05:14 PM | #573 |
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Recent studies show that 43% of women have used vibrators ,
From this we can only conclude that the other 57% bought theirs new.
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June 24th, 2018, 06:35 PM | #574 |
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I gave my wife a bunch of flowers yesterday, ungrateful cow said I suppose I have to open my legs for these. I said why, haven't you got a vase.
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June 24th, 2018, 09:58 PM | #575 |
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True quotes from Sir Winston Churchill:
Viscountess Astor: “If I were your wife I would poison your coffee…” Sir Winston Churchill: “And if I were your husband, I would drink it”. It was common knowledge that they both hated each other. Another one this time Member of Parliament Bessie Braddock. Bessie Braddock: “Winston, you are drunk, and what’s more you are disgustingly drunk.” Sir Winston Churchill: “Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly.”
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June 25th, 2018, 02:40 PM | #576 |
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Canon and Nikon are working on a camera that has such a fast shutter speed that it could take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut.
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June 27th, 2018, 11:21 AM | #577 |
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Wife said "If anything ever happens to me I want you to find someone new" ,
Turns out "Anything" doesn't include being stuck in traffic .
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June 29th, 2018, 02:01 PM | #578 |
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Wife set up a website to help the victims of domestic violence by talking about her experiences ,
She got 200 hits in the first hour , Until my hands began to hurt.
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July 1st, 2018, 04:19 AM | #579 |
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The first annual 'Me Too' meeting has been cancelled. The Chairman had insisted that all the women who attended had to wear a mini-skirt and stockings.
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July 1st, 2018, 05:29 AM | #580 |
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Whenever phone my wife on her mobile I speak as quietly as I can ,
The closer she holds it the greater the chance of a tumour developing.
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