Post your corny jokes - Page 1113

**effCup** · June 21st, 2016, 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SanteeFats

cross a chicken and a vacuum?

Why did the vacuum cross the road.
To succeed?

Estreeter · June 21st, 2016, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by effCup

Why did the vacuum cross the road.
To succeed?

Suck Seed .... must be new lawn sowed on the opposite nature strip

**Mal Hombre** · June 21st, 2016, 05:08 PM

A penis is like a vacuum cleaner,First it's hand held then it's an upright..

IronHerder · June 21st, 2016, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mal Hombre

A penis is like a vacuum cleaner,First it's hand held then it's an upright..

My vacuum cleaner doesn't need Viagra.

(I myself have 2 Viagra pills left, stored in a bottle labeled 'Lifetime Supply'. Why, you ask? Because I'm married: I'll never have any occasion for them.)

**bp666** · June 21st, 2016, 06:50 PM

You've gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.

**bp666** · June 21st, 2016, 06:51 PM

Say what you want about deaf people.

**Mal Hombre** · June 21st, 2016, 07:26 PM

Say what You like about midget prostitutes,They really jump to it..

**SanteeFats** · June 21st, 2016, 07:45 PM

A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?
*The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, about 2 hours.'
The guy left.
*A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, How long before I can get a haircut?'
The barber looked around at the shop and said, 'About 3 hours.' The guy left.
A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?
The barber looked around the shop and said, 'About an hour and a half'. The guy left.
The barber turned to his friend and said, 'Hey, Bob, do me a favor. Follow that guy and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but then he doesn't ever come back.'
A little while later, Bob returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, 'So, where does that guy go when he leaves?'
Bob looked up, wiped the tears from his eyes and said,
“Your house.”

**Gladys Allova** · June 21st, 2016, 08:25 PM

A man goes into a chip shop and says, "A portion of chips and a steak & kiddley pie please"

shopkeeper replies, "you mean a steak & kidney pie?"

"I said that diddle I"

**trailmaster** · June 21st, 2016, 09:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gladys Allova

A man goes into a chip shop and says, "A portion of chips and a steak & kiddley pie please"

shopkeeper replies, "you mean a steak & kidney pie?"

"I said that diddle I"

This joke sounds familiar. It is almost exactly like the joke Commander Data made to Engineer Geordi LaForge in the Star Trek TNG episode "Code of Honor"

June 21st, 2016, 05:08 PM	#11123
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,134 Thanks: 772,635 Thanked 855,646 Times in 57,562 Posts	A penis is like a vacuum cleaner,First it's hand held then it's an upright.. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 21st, 2016, 07:26 PM	#11127
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,134 Thanks: 772,635 Thanked 855,646 Times in 57,562 Posts	Say what You like about midget prostitutes,They really jump to it.. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

June 21st, 2016, 08:25 PM	#11129
Gladys Allova Vintage Member Join Date: Feb 2016 Location: A man's gotta chew what a man's gotta chew.. Posts: 4,990 Thanks: 67,890 Thanked 89,740 Times in 4,990 Posts	A man goes into a chip shop and says, "A portion of chips and a steak & kiddley pie please" shopkeeper replies, *"you mean a steak & kidney pie?"* "I said that diddle I"

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June 21st, 2016, 06:50 PM	#11125
bp666 Vintage Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 1,073 Thanks: 77,520 Thanked 14,183 Times in 1,074 Posts	You've gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.

June 21st, 2016, 06:51 PM	#11126
bp666 Vintage Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 1,073 Thanks: 77,520 Thanked 14,183 Times in 1,074 Posts	Say what you want about deaf people.

June 21st, 2016, 07:45 PM	#11128
SanteeFats Super Moderator Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: Santee, Ca Posts: 60,813 Thanks: 281,805 Thanked 813,762 Times in 60,861 Posts	A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut? The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, about 2 hours.' The guy left. A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, How long before I can get a haircut?' The barber looked around at the shop and said, 'About 3 hours.' The guy left. A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut? The barber looked around the shop and said, 'About an hour and a half'. The guy left. The barber turned to his friend and said, 'Hey, Bob, do me a favor. Follow that guy and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but then he doesn't ever come back.' A little while later, Bob returned to the shop, laughing hysterically. The barber asked, 'So, where does that guy go when he leaves?' Bob looked up, wiped the tears from his eyes and said, “Your house.”