July 9th, 2009, 12:10 PM | #1 |
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Grand Rear Admiral MaxJoker`s Non Conformist Confessional Church Thread
Welcome fellow brother members
Please remain seated While i stand and relate to you the purpose of this thread You see it`s to help unburden you of those sins you all keep committing , you know the ones Greed , Envy , Discouragement , Failing to thank, Wrath and of course Lust. Well to name but six anyway , still knowing you buggers that list probably doesn`t even come close to the amount you`re doing this very minute The again i`m not here to judge , simply to sympathize and absolve you of those troublesome burdens. Why if some seem repentant enough i may even award them sainthood Yet i don`t just mean the sins committed on this Holy Forum No i`m also speaking of the ones done away from this hallowed place , the ones that bring you unsettled minds , early lines and occasionally criminal fines So do you have em ??? Well come closer my son Type and be saved !
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July 9th, 2009, 12:24 PM | #2 |
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Sorry real Sins only please Brother Blondifan , as i can`t absolve jokes
Which as you can understand has disappointed a great many politicians
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July 9th, 2009, 12:31 PM | #3 |
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I covet my partner's daughter (my step-daughter). She's 28 and has breasts to die for....
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July 9th, 2009, 12:41 PM | #4 |
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I like that Leprechaun.
My biggest sin, this forum, but hey, sin is fun and I don't need to be absolved
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July 9th, 2009, 12:56 PM | #5 | |
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Bless you for the unburdening Brothers
Quote:
What but don`t you want to visit the kingdom of heaven , or in other words and without the rhyming slang Anyway too late you`ve been absolved , i thanked you Course there`s nothing to stop you going right out and being sinful all over again , in fact now it might even feel more sinful as your heart is so pure ?. Just make sure you visit the churches donation wallet on your way out , it`s located under my vestments in my back pocket All proceedings gratefully received
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July 9th, 2009, 01:02 PM | #6 | |
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Quote:
Given heaps of this, that gets me 3/4 there. Maybe, just maybe when you absolved me I'll make it
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July 9th, 2009, 04:30 PM | #7 |
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Had to remove the last three posts , which as a recognized man of the cloth pained me . But then one was undecipherable , the other far too large for far too little a pay off and the last simply contained a single word . So no absolution for you lot i`m afraid , still eventhough i may be a chicken bone away from the papacy i`m not a harsh man and so will prescribe you each one of these
Just make sure you take it on an empty stomach
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July 9th, 2009, 04:46 PM | #8 |
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Mwaahh haa hhaaah I like being a sinner, it comes naturally to me and Im good at it and practice sinning whenever possible!
However I will confess to having a small sherry now and then and spending more time on here than I should.
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Last edited by tabler; July 9th, 2009 at 04:49 PM.. |
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July 9th, 2009, 04:49 PM | #9 |
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I did once have sex with my (ex) girlfiends mum. Well I say 'once', it was actually about half a dozen times. But I do consider myself to have paid suitable penance in light of the cracking right hook to the jaw I recieved from said girlfriend upon the occasion of our last meeting.
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July 9th, 2009, 04:58 PM | #10 | |
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Quote:
By the way is it a sin to take a sickie without being sick? If so I think I need to be cleansed, a lot
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