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Old 12-30-2017, 03:31 PM   #13201
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Overheard at the latest AAA meeting:
"I drank to forget"
"So did I"
"Me too"
"Did it work?"
"Did what work"
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Old 12-30-2017, 06:20 PM   #13202
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"Go ahead and tell me a joke."
"Your marriage"
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Old 12-31-2017, 08:30 PM   #13203
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This tweet really happened and it may be the best one of the year!

When I told my parents over the phone that my husband has the flu, my dad said “Have you tried euthanasia?” and in the background my mom yelled “For the last time, it’s echinacea!”
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Old 01-01-2018, 11:05 AM   #13204
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And the first one of the new year:

'Whales. Animals actually the size of Whales.'
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Old 01-01-2018, 11:15 AM   #13205
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Quote:
Originally Posted by photoflex View Post
the size of Whales.
Could have been worse, given the size of Wales.
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Old 01-01-2018, 11:59 AM   #13206
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Yeah... doesn't really work with "the size of Belgium"
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Old 01-01-2018, 12:08 PM   #13207
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Staffsyeoman View Post
size of Belgium
Size of wallpaper?
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Old 01-02-2018, 12:15 AM   #13208
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When the Prisons Dept. was renamed the Dept. of Corrections, all the pens and pencils had to be let go, leaving them with only twink & erasers.

Then someone invented the paperless office.
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Old 01-08-2018, 01:15 PM   #13209
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My dad never liked me.
When I was young he made me bob for razorblades
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Old 01-11-2018, 11:42 PM   #13210
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