Did you ever go on nudie book hunts?

[kiwi]

Originally Posted by damp-patch

I also used to drop off my old mags as well so as to give some other sad lad a chance to find them. It was the least I could do.

I used to do that as well!

Although, admittedly never the really good issues - i.e. mags were all the women turned me on. I would leave the ones I thought were not so hot because I knew someone else might find them hot issues...

I would like to say that I did it out of the kindness of my heart, but that's not correct.

Stupidly, I believed it helped me to find other mags - Superstition - (Karma, maybe? if I'd known then what Karma was) If I had left some mags somewhere, then I usually found some more a few days later somewhere else.

Now it has occurred to me that we all could have been wandering around the country leaving our mags for each other. ... It also might explain why we are posters

Many thanks, damp-patch, For the story about the Manics (I'm a fan of their early stuff) & the link.

Kiwi

[jamey1974]

Love this thread.One of the best places to find dirty books was inside washes,or Resevoir channels in England.Always riding my bike.I'd look in the wash and see dozens and dozens of nudie books just thrown in.If there was no flood or if it wasn't raining you would have you're pick.I'm sure this is due to the man's old lady finding his stash and throwing it away where he could never find it.Men will look in every trash can in the neighborhood to get their stash back.These are with wives that give sex once a week.What the hell is a red-blooded man suppose to do?

[ptx4]

Most of posters in this thread are from Britain, right? Seems like porn grows on trees there Sadly, forests, building sites and even garbage dumps were smut free in Czech rep. or at least around the city I grew in. Didn't even think of going hunting myself 'cause even tough we played quite a lot in these places we never found anything of this sort.

[HBT731]

We used to hang out at a neighbors house that we didn't even like, to sneak out nudie books from his Dad's bathroom stash...lol. He never had anything hardcore though.

Kid's have it made these days with the internet. They have no idea how hard it was to come by good porn back in the day.

[imtrying]

I never went on a hunt myself, but I had a friend named Ronnie whose older brother Jimmy went on many a hunt and then sold us what he found for a dollar apiece. If only my parents knew how much of my chores money went to purchasing old beat up copies of "Gallery", "Players", and "Cheri", not to mention those hard core ones that were crummy quality black and white jobs. Ah, those were the days.

[zuckerman]

Originally Posted by kiwi

@ least 'he' didn't chug onto the mags ... don't think I'd have wanted them, then.

... tho, maybe that's just me...

I've seen places on the net where there are pictures of pictures of women covered in freshly shot jizz - Now, I'm sure shooting yer muck quite literally over the page is nothing new (I never did it - my mags were precious) but when you think about it - only the net & digital photography has allowed this to happen...

Kiwi

Overhead projector film, readily available from the school stationery cupboard when the technician had sloped out for a sneaky fag, did a nice job of protecting my precious Mayfair ladies when I was facialing them. Any mag with a full-page headshot, I had to buy it.

Niche area I suppose, but those homemade facials you sometimes see on the web may be a 'tribute': guy sends you a picture of his wife/girlfriend, you jizz on it, take a photo, send it back and they get to see the scale of your appreciation. I've seen this taken to quite sophisticated levels with one guy making little movies of his cock spurting over the pictures after having created a little mini-studio for his prick with a black background made out of art card so you could see the sperm contrast better!

Of course I think that's really about exhibitionism and I always remember one experience about that that ties in with the Neverending Wank Mag Hunt that had just begun in my life.

Some woods near my hometown; ideal place to ride Raleigh Choppers over tracks and hummocks pretending they were designed for the purpose instead of being the crappest bikes ever made. A new landfill site opens next to the woods. My fellow Raleigh owner discovers that if you can evade the watchman and his Alsatian, you can find nudie books in the landfill. Ah, the romance of youth never to be recaptured: wading through goodness knows what mess to find one sun-bleached, rain shriveled page and feeling like you'd found buried treasure. A whole mag could be squabbled over for hours - who takes it home first? So we had a rule: the mags stay put but we make a little stash wrapped in plastic and hid under a log.

My fellow porn hound had an irritating habit of poking his knob through the loose sheet pictures (takes all sorts) but I remember one day finding a perfectly preserved centrefold of an engorged p*ssy spread - a puffy labia, saliva drenched, held open epiphany - the hardest picture I had ever seen. Then my friend amazed me by licking the paper. You could almost hear the switch being thrown in my head: oh my goodness, I had never thought of doing that with a real p*ssy before.

I declined his generous offer to "have a lick". Too squeamish about somebody else's spit. Then he amazed me further by unshipping his prick and proceeding to jerk off. Then he came, quite deliberately, onto the spread p*ssy shot. Now I had discovered two new things you might do with a real p*ssy, though I had no idea how you might possibly persuade a real woman to hold still while you licked her c*nt. What would be in it for her? Yet another feminine mystery only Time would solve.

I "went down tip" much more often than my friend, scrupulously building up the stash, which was now stored in a buried bread bin! Then, one day, a whole gang of us went cycling in the woods and my friend said, "Hey, want to see some wank mags?"

Nooooo; Rule #2: don't tell anyone else about the stash!

And so I watched these unappreciative thugs ogling my most precious possessions, throw them around in wet undergrowth, tearing out pages ... and wondering if I'd ever feel worse in my whole life. And I did, because somebody decided we should have a campfire and the wood lying all about was damp so ALL the mags and pages went into this foul-smelling, smoke belching Bonfire of My Dreams.

I never forgave my 'friend'. Why did he do it? Well, he had graduated to real girls. But surely the b*stard could have come up with a different rite of passage.

My poor stash! Well, I supposed, I could rebuild it, better than before - stronger, faster! But a few days later, when a huge new chainlink fence enclosed the wooded area "due to the risk of fire", my hobby was in ruins. No easy access to the tip with a bike - hence no fast escapes from Bonzo the attack dog.

I entered the Dark Age, when the closest thing to a stash consisted of paltry swimsuit calendars, lingerie catalogues or pictures clipped from the TV Times (O Lamb's Navy Rum, thank you thank you thank you).

Then one day I plucked up the courage to go Top Shelf Foraging for the first time. Now here's a thing: if you're small, look eight years younger than you really are (and are wearing your school uniform), you can get short shrift from a newsagent. You have to find the sympathetic/greedy ones - usually the same bloke who'll sell you illegal fireworks and 10 Players.

Or ... one day you might get into an argument with a woman shop assistant who has challenged your age and find yourself debating porn with her. With with a woman shop assistant. And if you're lucky, the proposition 'there's nothing inside this magazine you can't see on TV or at the beach' will have her innocently turning pages in front of you. Holy f*ck! And that inaugurated a nudie mag hunt of an altogether different sort.

Curse the day I passed for 18 easily! And humble apologies to anyone I embarrassed.

[kiwi]

Thank you so much, zuckerman, for sharing your experiences my friend. You made me laugh so much!

And your story reminded me of a time I showed a group of guys from my class (I must have been about 11 years old) a nudie book I had found. Not a couple of pics but a whole magazine - a Knave - and it was in immaculate condition, or near enough. I was not @ that point aware of Rule #2: don't tell anyone else about the stash!

Though I soon F. learned...

It was lunch time & we were behind the football fields. I had found the mag a few days before in the shared bins behind our house. I had brought it to school because the day before I had (stupidly, on reflection) boasted that I had a full mag that not only showed hairy p*ssies but hairy p*ssies with pink show So, having looked at all the pages the b@stards proceeded it to tear it to pieces my beautiful magazine! Pages blowing away in the wind! (it was winter.) Other guys rubbing individual pages against their trouser-covered crotches! (it takes all sorts ) I stood there. Helpless. Watching them. Like some sort of gang rape of a nudie book... My F. nudie book! My only nudie book

We had to go back to school. But I promised myself that I was going back to get the pages I could find. It f. rained half way through the afternoon. Remember, this is winter in Scotland. It's pissing it down. Windy too. I could have wept.

And from then on, I never showed/shared my 'found' stash with anyone again.

@least not until the age of the internet

Thanks again, zuckerman.

Kiwi

[zuckerman]

Kiwi, dude, been there, lived through that nightmare!

I can remember when wank mags would turn up in the common room and you could start your stopwatch to time how long before it was a) ripped to shreds or b) pinned page by page to the darts board or c) obliterated by felt tip pen or d) nicked. Yeah, yeah - drawing glasses and a mustache or a big hairy bollocked knob on a wank mag ... that never got old for most people.

Sometimes, time and opportunity permitting, I would 'rescue' the poor thing. Maybe just a few pages sliced out with a pencil sharpener blade. It could be agonizing looking over the shoulders of the mob (trying not to look especially interested), then spotting some angel who might win my complete devotion in the time taken to flip the page, knowing that she'd have to take her chances through the free periods to come until I could find time to slip into the room unseen and retrieve her.

I'd spend half the day worrying that the cavalry would arrive too late; then the other half that someone would spot the incriminating evidence in my Addidas bag. Then when I got home I'd worry why out of an entire school of about 800, I seemed to be the only person that obsessed with smut. Just lucky I guess.

Some years ago I made a short-lived partnership with someone who ran a Read n Return secondhand book shop which had a half-decent selection of pre-loved wank mags. I ended up giving him advice about his stock (but not before buying up anything rare or potentially valuable at cheap prices!). I offloaded 1003 magazines through that shop and thought about clipping out the significant images on 'marginal' mags beforehand. But out of respect for the next user, I frown upon that practice.

However, I was certainly able to solve the mystery of why one customer's mags would come back feeling a good bit lighter than they went out. Trying to explain how that might be down to a) spillage or, more likely, b) page by page collecting seemed to disgust the shop owner in equal measure. How could you become so attached to a picture in a wank mag that you'd want to cut it out and keep it?

Incidentally, most new stock at the Read n Return wasn't trade-ins: a vast amount of mags came by way of the tip, where the owner bought them from the 'muckies' by the kilogram in bundles tied up with string. Recycling! However, it wasn't unknown to be able to pick up a stash out a house clearance. Some widow or executor would be flogging off the deceased's book collection and the porn might turn up in a box at the same time. If the general public had a sane and non-hypocritical attitude to porn, I often thought: just think what you might be able to find at an adult car boot sale! Then they invented e-Bay.

Just to show how sad I am, one day I was cycling in the Great Glen and I stopped to admire the view up Loch Ness. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted something blowing across the hillside about 4 miles distant that triggered my Subliminal Smut Sense and I went careening off-road to gather up the thing before the gale blew it away. It turned out to be this page of the delicious Kirsten Imrie with what is presumably a bit of common room humour scribbled on it.


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What are the odds: one of my top ten favourite softcore models 'finding' me there. It's at moments like that you realise that you just have a special destiny when it comes to porn and you might as well go with the flow. Very fond memories of Scotland: except, have you ever walked into a newsagent on Skye and tried to buy a wank mag?

[kiwi]

Originally Posted by zuckerman

Just to show how sad I am, one day I was cycling in the Great Glen and I stopped to admire the view up Loch Ness. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted something blowing across the hillside about 4 miles distant that triggered my Subliminal Smut Sense and I went careening off-road to gather up the thing before the gale blew it away. It turned out to be this page of the delicious Kirsten Imrie with what is presumably a bit of common room humour scribbled on it.

F. brilliant! - I am LMAO here ...

Originally Posted by zuckerman

What are the odds: one of my top ten favourite softcore models 'finding' me there. It's at moments like that you realise that you just have a special destiny when it comes to porn and you might as well go with the flow.

Indeed, my friend. & I'll tell you sth, I will still rescue a nudie book/page that I see somewhere. While I no longer go on nudie book hunts because I don't have a dog/time/energy - I always rescue bits I find. It's your duty.

Kiwi

[ollig]

What?

No porn in the Czech rep.?

That's because it's all in my C:/allusers/Czech_porn/[folder]