Post your corny jokes - Page 1241

**anothercustom** · June 16th, 2017, 03:18 PM

I bought a book on eBay called "How to Scam Idiots on eBay". Three months later and it's still not arrived.

**anothercustom** · June 16th, 2017, 03:38 PM

I rang Babestation last night and the hot girl on the other end of the line said "Hey sexy, what can I do for you?" I responded "Call me back, its cheaper".

**jafad** · June 16th, 2017, 04:49 PM

A hooded robber burst into a bank and forced the tellers to load a sack full of cash.
On his way out the door, a brave customer grabbed the hood and pulled it off, revealing the robbers face. The robber shot the customer without a moment's hesitation
He then looked around the bank and noticed one of the tellers looking straight at him.
The robber instantly shot him also.
By now, everyone in the bank is very, very scared. They all looked straight down at the floor in silence.
The robber yelled, "Well, did anyone else see my face?"
There are a few moments of utter silence in which everyone was plainly to afraid to speak.
Then, one old man tentatively raised his hand and without looking up said,
"My wife got a pretty good look at ya."
Robber says, "Oh yeah? where is she?"
The old man says, "She's at home, but I can go get her."

**jafad** · June 16th, 2017, 06:26 PM

What do you call an ape in a minefield?
A baboom

**anothercustom** · June 16th, 2017, 11:18 PM

I WRITE ALL MY JOKES IN CAPITALS. THIS ONE WAS WRITTEN IN LONDON.

**bloke57** · June 17th, 2017, 10:39 PM

Hannibal Lector turned up late to the dinner party again!

The hosts gave him the cold shoulder.

**anothercustom** · June 17th, 2017, 11:15 PM

My wife said I need to be more in touch with my feminine side. So, I crashed the car, burnt dinner and ignored her all day for no reason.

**ball7** · June 18th, 2017, 12:05 AM

I always wanted to be an actor and then finally I got my big break - a small, but pivotal part. But at the same time It made me the most hated man in the world.

I was the one who shot Bambi's mother.

**anothercustom** · June 18th, 2017, 02:41 PM

As a proud dad, I'll never forget my son's first words... "Where the fucking hell have you been for the past 20 years!"

**tygrkhat40** · June 18th, 2017, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by anothercustom

As a proud dad, I'll never forget my son's first words... "Where the fucking hell have you been for the past 20 years!"

I don't think that "Happy father's day, motherfucker" is appropriate for today.

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June 16th, 2017, 03:18 PM	#12401
anothercustom Vintage Member Join Date: Dec 2016 Posts: 4,950 Thanks: 25,742 Thanked 123,765 Times in 5,161 Posts	I bought a book on eBay called "How to Scam Idiots on eBay". Three months later and it's still not arrived.

June 16th, 2017, 03:38 PM	#12402
anothercustom Vintage Member Join Date: Dec 2016 Posts: 4,950 Thanks: 25,742 Thanked 123,765 Times in 5,161 Posts	I rang Babestation last night and the hot girl on the other end of the line said "Hey sexy, what can I do for you?" I responded "Call me back, its cheaper".

June 16th, 2017, 04:49 PM	#12403
jafad Vintage Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 547 Thanks: 740 Thanked 10,278 Times in 547 Posts	A hooded robber burst into a bank and forced the tellers to load a sack full of cash. On his way out the door, a brave customer grabbed the hood and pulled it off, revealing the robbers face. The robber shot the customer without a moment's hesitation He then looked around the bank and noticed one of the tellers looking straight at him. The robber instantly shot him also. By now, everyone in the bank is very, very scared. They all looked straight down at the floor in silence. The robber yelled, "Well, did anyone else see my face?" There are a few moments of utter silence in which everyone was plainly to afraid to speak. Then, one old man tentatively raised his hand and without looking up said, "My wife got a pretty good look at ya." Robber says, "Oh yeah? where is she?" The old man says, "She's at home, but I can go get her."

June 16th, 2017, 06:26 PM	#12404
jafad Vintage Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 547 Thanks: 740 Thanked 10,278 Times in 547 Posts	What do you call an ape in a minefield? A baboom

June 16th, 2017, 11:18 PM	#12405
anothercustom Vintage Member Join Date: Dec 2016 Posts: 4,950 Thanks: 25,742 Thanked 123,765 Times in 5,161 Posts	I WRITE ALL MY JOKES IN CAPITALS. THIS ONE WAS WRITTEN IN LONDON.

June 17th, 2017, 10:39 PM	#12406
bloke57 Veteran Member Join Date: Nov 2015 Location: Unaffordable housing Posts: 4,923 Thanks: 31,646 Thanked 68,928 Times in 4,921 Posts	Hannibal Lector turned up late to the dinner party again! The hosts gave him the cold shoulder.

June 17th, 2017, 11:15 PM	#12407
anothercustom Vintage Member Join Date: Dec 2016 Posts: 4,950 Thanks: 25,742 Thanked 123,765 Times in 5,161 Posts	My wife said I need to be more in touch with my feminine side. So, I crashed the car, burnt dinner and ignored her all day for no reason.

June 18th, 2017, 12:05 AM	#12408
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,287 Thanked 209,984 Times in 15,730 Posts	I always wanted to be an actor and then finally I got my big break - a small, but pivotal part. But at the same time It made me the most hated man in the world. I was the one who shot Bambi's mother.

June 18th, 2017, 02:41 PM	#12409
anothercustom Vintage Member Join Date: Dec 2016 Posts: 4,950 Thanks: 25,742 Thanked 123,765 Times in 5,161 Posts	As a proud dad, I'll never forget my son's first words... "Where the fucking hell have you been for the past 20 years!"