WORST films you`ve ever seen EVER !

[MaxJoker]

Now if you`re like me (Not that i`d ever want to wish that on you) then you have seen more than your fair share of utter cinematic crap , some of which you watched because of great reviews only to be left open mouthed and fuming come the end (Or even in some cases a few minutes into it).

So why not share your experience and painfully earned wisdom here , for one thing you might get commiseration from members who`ve survived the same film and at the very least it`ll help us know what to avoid , plus it might be good for a laugh and god knows we can always do with more of that


Guess i`ll have to go first, and as such i`ll go with the last shitty film i saw .Which was yesterday and called Dark Corners , it cost me three pounds from now defunct Zavvi and stars Thora Birch an actress i really like. Only she seemed to hate being in the thing as much as i hated watching it , no surprise really because none of it made ANY sense and contained so many unexplained and pointless plots that at one stage i considered tearing my burning brain out and sticking it in the freezer !.

It also had the single most confusing ending ever , which i won`t spoil for anyone by describing here , mainly as i still don`t know what the hell it was all about ???.

Yet the worst thing about the DVD was the extra behind the scenes bit where we were treated to a masterclass in blind optimisum and sheer arrogance by director Ray Gower , who during his 20 minutes of talking to camera not only compares himself and his style to Lynch and Cronenberg, but says he`s a combination of them both !


" Avoid at ALL costs "



" But suitable as a gift for someone you hate "

[billybunter]

The Matrix, I know it was very popular, I thought it was shite.

[snorkie]

Because it's in the American Movie Classics channel high rotation this month (and thus, hard to escape) I nominate "Reign of Fire." Grubbier than "Jabberwocky," worse special effects than "Dragonslayer," and nowhere as entertaining as either. Acting? McConaughey and Bale chew so much scenery, I'm surprised the dragon had anything left to burn.

Besides, the internal logic of the movie just doesn't work. Here's a nice little review:
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/articl...TL&type=movies

[Wendigo]

Originally Posted by snorkie

...worse special effects than "Dragonslayer,"

Remember that way back in 1981 those effects were pretty darn good. I saw it at the cinema twice and they were very impressive on the big screen. I have it on DVD and my only complaint is not seeing enough of Caitlin Clarke.

[snorkie]

Originally Posted by Wendigo

Remember that way back in 1981 those effects were pretty darn good. I saw it at the cinema twice and they were very impressive on the big screen. I have it on DVD and my only complaint is not seeing enough of Caitlin Clarke.

I agree that Dragonslayer had wonderful special effects, which shine next to those of Reign of Fire. I simply said it poorly.

[Wendigo]

Just watched A*P*E - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0074148/
Not surprisingly this is in imdb's list of the worst 100 movies ever.
If you thought the Toho version of King Kong was a tatty old thing just see what the South Koreans came up with.
The best parts - the ape battling a monster shark, and a young Joanna Kerns.

[oldrichie72]

Originally Posted by billybunter

The Matrix, I know it was very popular, I thought it was shite.

God yes, the slo-mo things and the sunglasses, the whole series sucked.

I'd have to throw "Dune" into the mix, wake me up when it's over, the book was miles ahead of the movie!

[scoundrel]

I was mulling over the question of what defines a bad film. There are many alternative ways in which a film can be just rubbish and one of the worst offences is to be dull, to fail in the first requirement of entertaining the viewer.

For this most heinous offence I nominate Strategic Air Command, which must surely be the worst film James Stewart ever made. This film has nothing worthwhile to say and says this nothing at great length. A baseball player and Air Force reservist is recalled to active duty and flies big planes around. Thats it! SFW!!!

The most interesting bit was when Stewart (an ex US Army Air Force officer) is reprimanded for wearing the wrong uniform, because he has been recalled into the Air Force, not the Army. Seriously. I've had more excitement from watching paint dry.

[mrploat]

Originally Posted by scoundrel

I was mulling over the question of what defines a bad film. There are many alternative ways in which a film can be just rubbish and one of the worst offences is to be dull, to fail in the first requirement of entertaining the viewer.

For this most heinous offence I nominate Strategic Air Command, which must surely be the worst film James Stewart ever made. This film has nothing worthwhile to say and says this nothing at great length. A baseball player and Air Force reservist is recalled to active duty and flies big planes around. Thats it! SFW!!!

The most interesting bit was when Stewart (an ex US Army Air Force officer) is reprimanded for wearing the wrong uniform, because he has been recalled into the Air Force, not the Army. Seriously. I've had more excitement from watching paint dry.

I'm not defending SAC but I'll tell you what its trying to say. When James Stewart is playing Baseball and a B36 files over, its saying we're all team players, whether in sport or as a nation. If it wasn't for the US military, we wouldn't have the freedom to play baseball. That's why he ends up joining the airforce without much prompting. He's part of the bigger team. WW2 may have been won but we've got to be vigilant so we dont lose WW3. And organisation will make us more vigilant. Organisation aka corporatism was key to the growth and success of 1950s America.

[scoundrel]

Originally Posted by mrploat

I'm not defending SAC but I'll tell you what its trying to say. When James Stewart is playing Baseball and a B36 files over, its saying we're all team players, whether in sport or as a nation. If it wasn't for the US military, we wouldn't have the freedom to play baseball. That's why he ends up joining the airforce without much prompting. He's part of the bigger team. WW2 may have been won but we've got to be vigilant so we dont lose WW3. And organisation will make us more vigilant. Organisation aka corporatism was key to the growth and success of 1950s America.

I am willing to stand corrected. I accept that it is not true or fair to criticise Strategic Air Command for having nothing to say. But it sure feels true.

I know that eternal vigilance is the price of liberty, but I also know (from my father) that there is no military duty more dull and more disliked than sentry duty and this is a film about aircraft on sentry duty. In 1959, my father spent weeks guarding the armoury at Rochester Barracks, Kent. At the time, a re-nascent IRA, starving for weapons and explosives, were known to be raiding British Army installations to steal from the armouries. Yet my father was stationed outside the armoury armed with an obsolete Lee Enfield rifle and no bullets. If anything kicked off, his orders were to fix his bayonet and charge: seriously. And he was still bored.

I accept (reluctantly) that Strategic Air Command is a worthy film about a worthy subject. But I dread the thought that it might be re-screened in the UK.