Register on the forum now to remove ALL ads + popups + get access to tons of hidden content for members only!
vintage erotica forum vintage erotica forum vintage erotica forum
vintage erotica forum

Go Back   Vintage Erotica Forums > Discussion & Talk Forum > Funnies

Follow Vintage Erotica Forum on Twitter
Best Porn Sites Meet Our Girls Register FAQ Members List Calendar Mark Forums Read

Notices
Funnies Got a joke or something funny that you want to share? Post it here!


Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-08-2009, 08:19 PM   #1
Mal Hombre
El Super Moderador
 
Mal Hombre's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Deepest Hampshire
Posts: 27,306
Thanks: 334,793
Thanked 366,919 Times in 27,645 Posts
Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+Mal Hombre 1000000+
Big Grin Lewd Limericks

A couple of Victorian examples :

There was a young man from peru
Who had nothing whatever to do
So He pulled out his carrot
And buggered his parrot
And sent the result to the zoo

There was a young lady from Diss
Went down to river to piss
A man in a punt
Shoved His pole up Her cunt
And gave Her the exquisite bliss

And one of My Own:
The boy stood on the burning deck
Eyes moist with emotion
He gave a cough
His balls dropped off
And rolled into the ocean
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


The nakedness of woman is the work of God-William Blake

It is a porn site,But it's a Classy porn site.
Mal Hombre
Mal Hombre is offline   Reply With Quote


Old 08-09-2009, 05:09 PM   #2
Ogri
Senior Member
 
Ogri's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Brown Willy, Dartmoor
Posts: 152
Thanks: 593
Thanked 1,643 Times in 147 Posts
Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+
Default

The lass I brought home was a prize,
with an alluring set of blue eyes,
her breasts, so well kept,
were what I’d expect,
but her penis was quite a surprise.


There was an old man from China,
Who wasn’t a very good climber,
He fell on a rock,
Split his cock,
And now he’s got a vagina.


There once was a man from Brighton
Who said to his girl, “You’re a tight one.”
She said, “Pardon my soul,
but you’re in the wrong hole.
There’s plenty of room in the right one.”
Ogri is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2009, 05:31 PM   #3
Mufflover
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 152
Thanks: 1,257
Thanked 919 Times in 148 Posts
Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+Mufflover 5000+
Default

Asked a young fellow named Harden,
Being sucked by a wench in a garden,
"Just what do you do
With all of that goo?"
And she replied "*gulp* Beg your pardon?"
Mufflover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-12-2009, 12:51 PM   #4
mrfixit
Vintage Member
 
mrfixit's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Elm Street
Posts: 695
Thanks: 58,489
Thanked 7,441 Times in 706 Posts
mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+mrfixit 25000+
Default

There once was a man from Nantucket.
Whos dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin.
As he wiped off his chin.
"If my ear was a cunt I could f**k it."
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?
mrfixit is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-12-2009, 01:10 PM   #5
Fan
Senior Member
 
Fan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 175
Thanks: 10,032
Thanked 3,788 Times in 187 Posts
Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+Fan 10000+
Default

A young lady who lived in Devizes
Had breasts that were two different sizes:
One was so small
It was no good at all,
The other so large it won prizes
Fan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-13-2009, 09:03 AM   #6
Ogri
Senior Member
 
Ogri's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Brown Willy, Dartmoor
Posts: 152
Thanks: 593
Thanked 1,643 Times in 147 Posts
Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+
Default

A circus midget named Pitts
Was subject to passionate fits;
But his pleasure in life, was to suck off his wife
While he swung by his knees from her tits.

There was a young girl from Kilkenny
Whose usual charge was a penny
For half of that sum
You could roger her bum
A source of amusement to many.
Ogri is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-02-2009, 06:47 PM   #7
Ogri
Senior Member
 
Ogri's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Brown Willy, Dartmoor
Posts: 152
Thanks: 593
Thanked 1,643 Times in 147 Posts
Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+
Default

Mary had a little pig
She kept it fat and plastered
And when the price of pork went up
She shot the little bastard

Jack and Jill went up the hill
to have some hanky panky
Silly Jill forgot her pill
And now there's little Franky

Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was white and wispy
then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease
And now it's black and crispy

Hey diddle, diddle, the cat took a piddle
All over the bedside clock
The little dog laughed to see such fun
Then died of electric shock
Ogri is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-04-2009, 04:19 PM   #8
Gladeways
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 30
Thanks: 12
Thanked 263 Times in 29 Posts
Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+
Default

There was a young lady from Bude
Who sunbathed on the beach in the nude.
A man on the sea front
shouted "Show us your cunt!"
Out loud...like that....Fucking rude!


There once was a poet named Wood
whose poetry was really quite bad.
He tried time after time
to make the lines fit
but they were too short.
Gladeways is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-04-2009, 04:21 PM   #9
Gladeways
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 30
Thanks: 12
Thanked 263 Times in 29 Posts
Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+Gladeways 1000+
Default

Sing a song of sixpence
a pocket full of rye,
Four and twenty blackbirds
baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened,
all the birds were dead.
Gladeways is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to Gladeways For This Useful Post:
Old 09-04-2009, 06:45 PM   #10
Ogri
Senior Member
 
Ogri's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Brown Willy, Dartmoor
Posts: 152
Thanks: 593
Thanked 1,643 Times in 147 Posts
Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+Ogri 5000+
Default

There was a young girl from Throgmorton
Who had one long tit and a short 'un.
To make up for that,
She'd a hairy great twat,
And a fart like a 650 Norton.

There was a young lady from Kent,
With a cunt of enormous extent.
It was so deep and so wide,
The acoustics inside,
Caused an echo whenever you spent.

There was a young girl from Cape Cod,
Who dreamed she was sleeping with God.
‘Twas not the Almighty,
Who pulled up her nightie,
‘Twas Roger, the lodger, the sod.

There was a young man from Coblenz
Whose balls were quite simply immense:
It took forty draymen
A priest and three laymen
To transport them thither and hence.
Ogri is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump




All times are GMT. The time now is 02:30 PM.






vBulletin Optimisation provided by vB Optimise v2.6.1 (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2017 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.