Register on the forum now to remove ALL ads + popups + get access to tons of hidden content for members only!
vintage erotica forum vintage erotica forum vintage erotica forum
vintage erotica forum

Go Back   Vintage Erotica Forums > Discussion & Talk Forum > Funnies

Follow Vintage Erotica Forum on Twitter
Best Porn Sites Meet Our Girls Register FAQ Members List Calendar Mark Forums Read

Notices
Funnies Got a joke or something funny that you want to share? Post it here!


Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-15-2017, 02:38 PM   #12741
anothercustom
Vintage Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,289
Thanks: 8,190
Thanked 23,506 Times in 1,303 Posts
anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+
Default

I asked my son if he’d seen my newspaper. He replied "They're old school" and handed me his iPad.

That fly didn’t stand a chance.

Last edited by anothercustom; 06-15-2017 at 02:46 PM.. Reason: Spelling
anothercustom is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to anothercustom For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 12:22 PM   #12742
anothercustom
Vintage Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,289
Thanks: 8,190
Thanked 23,506 Times in 1,303 Posts
anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+
Default

My wife has just left me due to my ongoing obsession with cricket. It's really hit me for 6.
anothercustom is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to anothercustom For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 12:54 PM   #12743
bloke57
Veteran Member
 
bloke57's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Unaffordable housing
Posts: 4,022
Thanks: 22,781
Thanked 47,067 Times in 4,046 Posts
bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+bloke57 175000+
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by anothercustom View Post
My wife has just left me due to my ongoing obsession with cricket. It's really hit me for 6.
I'm stumped at what advice to give - but you'll just have to go out and bowl another maiden over.

You might lose your house - so check your insurance in case you need extra cover.
bloke57 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 14 Users Say Thank You to bloke57 For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 01:28 PM   #12744
effCup
Vintage Idiot
 
effCup's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: the gutter... -ing
Posts: 15,620
Thanks: 173,342
Thanked 185,891 Times in 15,478 Posts
effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+effCup 750000+
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by bloke57 View Post
in case you need extra cover.
Are you standing at silly mid scoff, blokey?
effCup is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 12 Users Say Thank You to effCup For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 01:45 PM   #12745
tygrkhat40
Long Suffering Bills Fan
 
tygrkhat40's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: The City of Good Neighbors
Posts: 9,624
Thanks: 302,765
Thanked 127,316 Times in 9,614 Posts
tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+tygrkhat40 500000+
Default

It's really a sticky wicket if you keep using references that go over the heads of us poor Yanks.
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

tygrkhat40 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 18 Users Say Thank You to tygrkhat40 For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 03:18 PM   #12746
anothercustom
Vintage Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,289
Thanks: 8,190
Thanked 23,506 Times in 1,303 Posts
anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+
Default

I bought a book on eBay called "How to Scam Idiots on eBay". Three months later and it's still not arrived.
anothercustom is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 17 Users Say Thank You to anothercustom For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 03:38 PM   #12747
anothercustom
Vintage Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,289
Thanks: 8,190
Thanked 23,506 Times in 1,303 Posts
anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+
Default

I rang Babestation last night and the hot girl on the other end of the line said "Hey sexy, what can I do for you?" I responded "Call me back, its cheaper".
anothercustom is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to anothercustom For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 04:49 PM   #12748
jafad
Senior Member
 
jafad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 122
Thanks: 157
Thanked 4,451 Times in 128 Posts
jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+
Default

A hooded robber burst into a bank and forced the tellers to load a sack full of cash.
On his way out the door, a brave customer grabbed the hood and pulled it off, revealing the robbers face. The robber shot the customer without a moment's hesitation
He then looked around the bank and noticed one of the tellers looking straight at him.
The robber instantly shot him also.
By now, everyone in the bank is very, very scared. They all looked straight down at the floor in silence.
The robber yelled, "Well, did anyone else see my face?"
There are a few moments of utter silence in which everyone was plainly to afraid to speak.
Then, one old man tentatively raised his hand and without looking up said,
"My wife got a pretty good look at ya."
Robber says, "Oh yeah? where is she?"
The old man says, "She's at home, but I can go get her."
jafad is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 14 Users Say Thank You to jafad For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 06:26 PM   #12749
jafad
Senior Member
 
jafad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 122
Thanks: 157
Thanked 4,451 Times in 128 Posts
jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+jafad 25000+
Default

What do you call an ape in a minefield?
A baboom
jafad is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 14 Users Say Thank You to jafad For This Useful Post:
Old 06-16-2017, 11:18 PM   #12750
anothercustom
Vintage Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,289
Thanks: 8,190
Thanked 23,506 Times in 1,303 Posts
anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+anothercustom 100000+
Default

I WRITE ALL MY JOKES IN CAPITALS. THIS ONE WAS WRITTEN IN LONDON.
anothercustom is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 20 Users Say Thank You to anothercustom For This Useful Post:
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump




All times are GMT. The time now is 11:43 PM.






vBulletin Optimisation provided by vB Optimise v2.6.1 (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2018 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.