Humorous and/or perceptive song lyrics

Astatine · January 30th, 2011, 10:13 AM

Perhaps it's my warped sense of humour but there are some class lyrics that make me smile or think, usually the former as thinking is over-rated, at least that what I tell the girls ...

Anyway a few examples to make this less abstract:

"I've lived in filth and I've lived in sin
But I still smell better than the shit you're in"
Iron Maiden, Holy Smoke

"Do you love me?
I fuck you don't I?"
The Macc Lads, Do You Love Me?

"Some balls are held for charity, some for fancy dress
But those that are held for pleasure are the ones that I like best"
AC/DC, Big Balls

"In the case of sonic attack
It is important to bring all bodies to orgasm simultaneously"
Hawkwind, Sonic Attack

"I were right confused over what she said
So I supped 10 pints down Old Bears Head"
The Macc Lads, Do you love me?

"She'll swap a knuckle shuffle for a note to get off games"
The Macc Lads, Julie the Schooly

"You told me that you loved me.
I never fucking did"
The Macc Lads, Fluffy Pup

"God told me to skin you alive"
Dead Kennedys, When Ya Get Drafted

And, one of my all-time favourites ...

"You'll never walk again"
Terraces of Leeds United

**theequestrian** · January 30th, 2011, 01:47 PM

Harry Nilsson - You're breaking my heart
"You're breaking my heart, you're tearing it apart, so fuck you"

The Equestrian - Gods' Will
"These TV preachers screaming for us sinners to 'repent',
The only thing almighty to these clowns are 'Dead Presidents",
They jump and shout, genuflect and flounce,
If you want to meet god the check better not bounce..."

Michael Jackson - Bad.
No quote here. Just the fact that Michael Jackson is singing about being a tough ass makes this song absurdly funny

**tygrkhat40** · January 30th, 2011, 03:33 PM

Concrete racktracks nationwide
Juggernauts carving up the countryside
Cars by the million on a one way ride
Using up the future

"Can't Happen Here," Rainbow from the Difficult to Cure album from 1981.

**Mal Hombre** · March 15th, 2014, 07:07 PM

Sit On My Face
Sit on my face, and tell me that you love me
I'll sit on your face and tell you I love you, too
I love to hear you ORALIZE
When I'm between your thighs
You blow me away
Sit On My Face

Sit on my face and let my lips embrace you
I'll sit on your face and THEN I'LL LOVE YOU TRULY
Life can be fine if we both sixty-nine
IF WE sit on our faces in all sorts of places and play
'Till we're blown away
Monty Python

**electile disfunction** · March 15th, 2014, 07:28 PM

Fire Woman
The Cult

Well, shake it up, you're to blame, got me swaying little honey.
My heart's a ball of burning flame, oh, yes it is.
Twisting like a cat on a hot tin shack. Lord, have mercy!
Come on little sister come on and shake it.

**lothian** · March 15th, 2014, 09:56 PM

Rattlesnake shake Fleetwood Mac

I know this guy
his name is Mick
he don't care if he ain't got no chick
He do the shake , the Rattlesnake shake

**Meini Hirion** · March 16th, 2014, 01:03 AM

Time Flies By (When You're A Driver Of A Train)

Half Man Half Biscuit

Quote:

Time flies by when you're a driver of a train,
Speeding out of Trumpton with a cargo of cocaine.
I get high when I'm a pilot of a plane.
Touching down in Camberwick, I’m stoned out of my brain.
*
Under bridges, over bridges, to our destination.
Careful with that spliff, Eugene, it causes condensation.
*
Every saturday I get the Chigley skins.
And they always smash my windows 'cos the home side always wins.
*
Time flies by when you're a driver of a train,
Gonna get my syringes out and crank up once again.
*
Under bridges, over bridges, to our destination.
Careful with that spliff, Eugene, it causes condensation.

UK Nostalgia Freaks see it here...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjaBqqfPoK0

**theequestrian** · March 17th, 2014, 01:35 AM

Here's a lyric from a song I'm recording for my album - might be the single. It's my take on the current state of affairs in the music industry and also a handy 'How To' guide for the budding musician. The music to it uses the 'Bo Diddly' riff as it's basic rhythm.

ROCK GOD - c2014 theequestrian

This here lyric ain't worth shit
Won't keep me from singing it
Vapid lines with bad cliches
But you don't listen anyway
The phrasing is tortured, the grammar am real bad
Got the makings of a classic

This is the 'Bo Diddly' riff
Thousanth time that it's been ripped
Since he's dead he can't complain
Roticerizing in his grave
Derivative, uninspired, no originality
A certain Grammy winner

This is where you put the 'break'
It's formula, don't deviate
If you crank it up and add Delay
They'll never know that you can't play
Just bang away on the 'tonic', don't do nothing strange
And tell yourself you're Hendrix

(Here follows the worst possible solo I can play)

If you've no ability
Shave your head, grow a goatee
They will never ask for more
If you dress up like a High School whore
Bow to 'Demographics' as your new deity
And give the public what they want

Don't need talent, don't need skill
All you need are 'looks that kill'
Strike a pose and act real cool
Get the latest version of Pro Tools
Only use the pre-sets on your new drum machine
And soon you'll be a Rock God

GoneTo · March 17th, 2014, 02:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mal Hombre

Sit On My Face
Sit on my face, and tell me that you love me
I'll sit on your face and tell you I love you, too
I love to hear you ORALIZE
When I'm between your thighs
You blow me away
Sit On My Face

Sit on my face and let my lips embrace you
I'll sit on your face and THEN I'LL LOVE YOU TRULY
Life can be fine if we both sixty-nine
IF WE sit on our faces in all sorts of places and play
'Till we're blown away
Monty Python

Such poetry...
I hope my next girlfriend sings me this song

**Meini Hirion** · March 17th, 2014, 02:31 AM

Sorry for this..I'm not a 'druggie' ...but my first two posts in this thread...are about 'drug' humour situations.

Tom Lehrer...before many of us were born...a 1960 concert recording [audio only with Lyrics]

UTube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GTfuGeKPsZM

Quote:

When the shades of night are falling,
Comes a fellow everyone knows.
It's the old dope peddler,
Spreading joy wherever he goes.

Every evening you will find him,
Around our neighborhood.
It's the old dope peddler
Doing well by doing good.

He gives the kids free samples,
Because he knows full well T
hat today's young innocent faces
Will be tomorrow's clientele.
Here's a cure for all your troubles,
Here's an end to all distress.
It's the old dope peddler
With his powdered happiness.

Written and first performed in the early 1950s

Tom is really good, just a piano and cutting and humouress comments.
Bob Dylan rated Tom alongside Elvis as early influences.
The former for intelligence and observation, the latter for
charisma and interpretaion.

January 30th, 2011, 10:13 AM	#1
Astatine Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Where foreplay is taking your socks off Posts: 193 Thanks: 211 Thanked 1,840 Times in 179 Posts	Humorous and/or perceptive song lyrics Perhaps it's my warped sense of humour but there are some class lyrics that make me smile or think, usually the former as thinking is over-rated, at least that what I tell the girls ... Anyway a few examples to make this less abstract: "I've lived in filth and I've lived in sin But I still smell better than the shit you're in" Iron Maiden, Holy Smoke "Do you love me? I fuck you don't I?" The Macc Lads, Do You Love Me? "Some balls are held for charity, some for fancy dress But those that are held for pleasure are the ones that I like best" AC/DC, Big Balls "In the case of sonic attack It is important to bring all bodies to orgasm simultaneously" Hawkwind, Sonic Attack "I were right confused over what she said So I supped 10 pints down Old Bears Head" The Macc Lads, Do you love me? "She'll swap a knuckle shuffle for a note to get off games" The Macc Lads, Julie the Schooly "You told me that you loved me. I never fucking did" The Macc Lads, Fluffy Pup "God told me to skin you alive" Dead Kennedys, When Ya Get Drafted And, one of my all-time favourites ... "You'll never walk again" Terraces of Leeds United

January 30th, 2011, 01:47 PM	#2
theequestrian Vintage Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: A hop, skip & a jump from Daytona Beach, Florida Posts: 1,177 Thanks: 4,807 Thanked 11,707 Times in 1,156 Posts	Harry Nilsson - You're breaking my heart "You're breaking my heart, you're tearing it apart, so fuck you" The Equestrian - Gods' Will "These TV preachers screaming for us sinners to 'repent', The only thing almighty to these clowns are 'Dead Presidents", They jump and shout, genuflect and flounce, If you want to meet god the check better not bounce..." Michael Jackson - Bad. No quote here. Just the fact that Michael Jackson is singing about being a tough ass makes this song absurdly funny __________________ 'If we could read each others minds, we'd all sleep with loaded guns' -theequestrian

March 15th, 2014, 07:07 PM	#4
Mal Hombre El Super Moderador Join Date: May 2009 Location: Adoptive Monkey Hanger Posts: 58,105 Thanks: 772,405 Thanked 855,334 Times in 57,538 Posts	Sit On My Face Sit on my face, and tell me that you love me I'll sit on your face and tell you I love you, too I love to hear you ORALIZE When I'm between your thighs You blow me away Sit On My Face Sit on my face and let my lips embrace you I'll sit on your face and THEN I'LL LOVE YOU TRULY Life can be fine if we both sixty-nine IF WE sit on our faces in all sorts of places and play 'Till we're blown away Monty Python __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. If in doubt, Just ask Yourself What Would Max Do ? It is a porn site,But its a Classy porn site. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

March 17th, 2014, 01:35 AM	#8
theequestrian Vintage Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: A hop, skip & a jump from Daytona Beach, Florida Posts: 1,177 Thanks: 4,807 Thanked 11,707 Times in 1,156 Posts	Here's a lyric from a song I'm recording for my album - might be the single. It's my take on the current state of affairs in the music industry and also a handy 'How To' guide for the budding musician. The music to it uses the 'Bo Diddly' riff as it's basic rhythm. ROCK GOD - c2014 theequestrian This here lyric ain't worth shit Won't keep me from singing it Vapid lines with bad cliches But you don't listen anyway The phrasing is tortured, the grammar am real bad Got the makings of a classic This is the 'Bo Diddly' riff Thousanth time that it's been ripped Since he's dead he can't complain Roticerizing in his grave Derivative, uninspired, no originality A certain Grammy winner This is where you put the 'break' It's formula, don't deviate If you crank it up and add Delay They'll never know that you can't play Just bang away on the 'tonic', don't do nothing strange And tell yourself you're Hendrix (Here follows the worst possible solo I can play) If you've no ability Shave your head, grow a goatee They will never ask for more If you dress up like a High School whore Bow to 'Demographics' as your new deity And give the public what they want Don't need talent, don't need skill All you need are 'looks that kill' Strike a pose and act real cool Get the latest version of Pro Tools Only use the pre-sets on your new drum machine And soon you'll be a Rock God __________________ 'If we could read each others minds, we'd all sleep with loaded guns' -theequestrian

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January 30th, 2011, 03:33 PM	#3
tygrkhat40 Long Suffering Bills Fan Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: The City of Good Neighbors Posts: 9,669 Thanks: 304,243 Thanked 152,240 Times in 9,629 Posts	Concrete racktracks nationwide Juggernauts carving up the countryside Cars by the million on a one way ride Using up the future "Can't Happen Here," Rainbow from the Difficult to Cure album from 1981.

March 15th, 2014, 07:28 PM	#5
electile disfunction Vintage Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Somewhere flat, that's either hot, cold, or windy ... Canada? Posts: 1,966 Thanks: 42,100 Thanked 21,351 Times in 1,903 Posts	Fire Woman The Cult Well, shake it up, you're to blame, got me swaying little honey. My heart's a ball of burning flame, oh, yes it is. Twisting like a cat on a hot tin shack. Lord, have mercy! Come on little sister come on and shake it.

March 15th, 2014, 09:56 PM	#6
lothian Vintage Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Edinburgh Scotland Posts: 706 Thanks: 7,330 Thanked 9,841 Times in 704 Posts	Rattlesnake shake Fleetwood Mac I know this guy his name is Mick he don't care if he ain't got no chick He do the shake , the Rattlesnake shake