Twisted sick jokes that`ll send us ALL to hell. - Page 99

**seany65** · September 10th, 2016, 03:48 PM

It's amazing to compare the 0% of hilary clinton's supporters who admit she's a chronic liar to the 60% of the general public who admit she's a chronic liar.

**AmateurEmale** · September 10th, 2016, 04:51 PM

It's amusing to hear that Gary Johnson (L-NM) didn't know what Aleppo was.

Because here I thought it was the brand of dog food they give to Jiggs in the USMC.

MaxJoker · September 10th, 2016, 05:19 PM

Why don’t Jewish cannibals like eating Germans ? ,

They give them gas.

What is a Jewish child doing sitting on top of a roof near a chimney ?,

Waiting for his parents.

How do you get 1,000 Jews into a mini ? ,

Toss in a penny.

Why did so many Jews go to Auschwitz ?,

The fare was free.

**SanteeFats** · September 10th, 2016, 05:30 PM

In line with Max's post above.

Q: What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout?
A: A boy scout comes home from camp.

**AmateurEmale** · September 11th, 2016, 07:19 PM

What do you call a Marine who like Star Wars?

A Jar-Jar-Binks-Head. [Insulting to Marines because the character looked idiotic, plus couldn't fight.]

What do you call a gay Marine?

Semper F@g.

**@llatse@** · September 12th, 2016, 02:33 PM

Whats the difference between a Polack and an Irish person (political correctness even here)?

One has a low IQ the other doesn't even know what IQ means

**DonnyJoe** · September 15th, 2016, 03:49 PM

What's the difference between E.T. and illegal aliens?

E.T. learned English and wanted to go home.

**AmateurEmale** · September 16th, 2016, 09:49 PM

Joke on the Internet (some variants may be floating around... pun intended...)

Q. Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are in a lifeboat in the Atlantic Ocean. There are no ships visible anywhere, and no sight of land whatsoever. Who survives?

A. The American people.

)

**@llatse@** · September 17th, 2016, 08:50 PM

This shabby looking old bloke in a mucky raincoat is up in court and as he stands in the dock, just as the judge is going thru' his list of crimes he has a major coughing fit.

The judge tries his best over the spluttering perv "Raymond Boggs, no fixed abode, you stand accused of extreme goat buggery, onanism in a public place outraging the public decency, sniffing toilets in Shitetown All Girls Grammer School, horse wanking, rape of a minor and a miner...at the same time......and whale blubber fornication in the incorrect attire.....how do you plead?"

Another coughing fit ensues as the man who made Jimmy Savile look normal tries to say "Guilty"

The judge then says "Have you tried sucking on a Fisherman's Friend?"

"I'm in enough trouble as it is....splutter...cough...Your Honour"

(For the non Brit VEF members, Fisherman's Friend are throat lozenges

)

**ManofKent** · September 20th, 2016, 11:09 AM

"The other night my girlfriend said to me "Your a pervert!". I said to her "That's a very big word for a nine year old!".

(Emo Phillips).

September 10th, 2016, 03:48 PM	#981
seany65 Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 3,663 Thanks: 80,576 Thanked 32,819 Times in 3,540 Posts	It's amazing to compare the 0% of hilary clinton's supporters who admit she's a chronic liar to the 60% of the general public who admit she's a chronic liar. __________________ <-- That's Emer Kenny and I want to be stuck in her front bottom. Quote from electrofreak : I'd rather have questions that can't be answered, than answers that can't be questioned.

September 10th, 2016, 05:19 PM	#983
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,907 Times in 69,067 Posts	Uh huh, now do you understand what I meant by twisted sick jokes that`ll send us all to hell ? Why don’t Jewish cannibals like eating Germans ? , They give them gas. What is a Jewish child doing sitting on top of a roof near a chimney ?, Waiting for his parents. How do you get 1,000 Jews into a mini ? , Toss in a penny. Why did so many Jews go to Auschwitz ?, The fare was free. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

September 12th, 2016, 02:33 PM	#986
@llatse@ Vintage Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Over the hills and far away Posts: 2,150 Thanks: 7,755 Thanked 24,866 Times in 2,098 Posts	Whats the difference between a Polack and an Irish person (political correctness even here)? One has a low IQ the other doesn't even know what IQ means __________________ Lord, we might end up dead or worse, poor

September 15th, 2016, 03:49 PM	#987
DonnyJoe Vintage Member Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Northern Plains U.S.A. Posts: 223 Thanks: 6,811 Thanked 13,106 Times in 416 Posts	What's the difference between E.T. and illegal aliens? E.T. learned English and wanted to go home. __________________ Where Ever You Go...There You Are!

September 17th, 2016, 08:50 PM	#989
@llatse@ Vintage Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Over the hills and far away Posts: 2,150 Thanks: 7,755 Thanked 24,866 Times in 2,098 Posts	This shabby looking old bloke in a mucky raincoat is up in court and as he stands in the dock, just as the judge is going thru' his list of crimes he has a major coughing fit. The judge tries his best over the spluttering perv "Raymond Boggs, no fixed abode, you stand accused of extreme goat buggery, onanism in a public place outraging the public decency, sniffing toilets in Shitetown All Girls Grammer School, horse wanking, rape of a minor and a miner...at the same time......and whale blubber fornication in the incorrect attire.....how do you plead?" Another coughing fit ensues as the man who made Jimmy Savile look normal tries to say "Guilty" The judge then says "Have you tried sucking on a Fisherman's Friend?" "I'm in enough trouble as it is....splutter...cough...Your Honour" (For the non Brit VEF members, Fisherman's Friend are throat lozenges ) __________________ Lord, we might end up dead or worse, poor

September 10th, 2016, 04:51 PM	#982
AmateurEmale Vintage Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: The 513 Posts: 1,825 Thanks: 16,644 Thanked 15,799 Times in 1,755 Posts	It's amusing to hear that Gary Johnson (L-NM) didn't know what Aleppo was. Because here I thought it was the brand of dog food they give to Jiggs in the USMC.

September 10th, 2016, 05:30 PM	#984
SanteeFats Super Moderator Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: Santee, Ca Posts: 60,942 Thanks: 282,146 Thanked 815,741 Times in 60,990 Posts	In line with Max's post above. Q: What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? A: A boy scout comes home from camp.

September 11th, 2016, 07:19 PM	#985
AmateurEmale Vintage Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: The 513 Posts: 1,825 Thanks: 16,644 Thanked 15,799 Times in 1,755 Posts	What do you call a Marine who like Star Wars? A Jar-Jar-Binks-Head. [Insulting to Marines because the character looked idiotic, plus couldn't fight.] What do you call a gay Marine? Semper F@g.

September 16th, 2016, 09:49 PM	#988
AmateurEmale Vintage Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: The 513 Posts: 1,825 Thanks: 16,644 Thanked 15,799 Times in 1,755 Posts	Joke on the Internet (some variants may be floating around... pun intended...) Q. Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are in a lifeboat in the Atlantic Ocean. There are no ships visible anywhere, and no sight of land whatsoever. Who survives? A. The American people. )

September 20th, 2016, 11:09 AM	#990
ManofKent Vintage Member Join Date: May 2013 Location: U.K Posts: 1,130 Thanks: 10,125 Thanked 13,836 Times in 1,113 Posts	"The other night my girlfriend said to me "Your a pervert!". I said to her "That's a very big word for a nine year old!". (Emo Phillips).