Twisted sick jokes that`ll send us ALL to hell. - Page 143

Estreeter · July 5th, 2018, 10:14 AM

Have you ever noticed that it's only people who are perfect that are murdered or die in horrific accidents?

"He was the perfect husband" , "She was the perfect daughter." "A tragic accident they were the perfect family." "They died together, the perfect couple till the end." Makes me glad I abuse my kids and beat up my wife. Kind of makes them and I immortal

**Mister Fide** · July 5th, 2018, 08:28 PM

Woman : I have just been raped by a madman
Policeman : What makes you believe he was a madman?
Woman : I had to show him what to do

**ball7** · July 5th, 2018, 08:37 PM

My first wife died of poisoned mushrooms, my second wife died of poisoned mushrooms, my third wife died of head injuries....she wouldn't eat the poisoned mushrooms.

Estreeter · July 6th, 2018, 09:57 AM

I think I may have a body odour problem

My last two dates ended oddly, both women sprayed me with perfume before we had sex

I can't quite place the brand but it had a distinct sharp peppery smell

MaxJoker · July 6th, 2018, 01:46 PM

What's the cruelest thing to do to a one-armed Ethiopian hanging from a cliff ? ,

Offer him slice of watermelon .

My daughter always dreamed of getting married when she was a little girl ,

So we converted to Islam.

How do you know an Ethiopian is going to die ? ,

Their friends are crowding around with knives and forks .

**ball7** · July 6th, 2018, 07:44 PM

I was once asked to identify a burn victim
It was my friend KFC

**fatrat1** · July 7th, 2018, 09:45 AM

Woman goes into the doctors.

Doctor! Doctor! I've been Graped.

Don't you meant raped?

Well yes, but there was a bunch of them.

MaxJoker · July 7th, 2018, 05:40 PM

The Jew kid in my class handed in an absolutely fantastic essay about the Holocaust today ,

Was so good that gave him a gold star.

A young Jew was knocked down (Backed over) and (Eventually) killed (Hey, nobody saw me) on the road near my house last night ,

His family have been out there all day ,

Drawing flowers on the lamp post.

MaxJoker · July 9th, 2018, 03:03 PM

My son is such a miserable cunt,

I bought him a trampoline for his birthday ,

But all he wants to do is sit in his wheelchair and cry.

**bp666** · July 10th, 2018, 09:04 AM

I heard on the news that the top Serbian tennis player was down in Salisbury poisoning people.

What the farck Novichok, get back to Wimbledon and play tennis. Bloody foreigners!!

July 5th, 2018, 10:14 AM	#1421
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,117 Thanks: 449,715 Thanked 896,775 Times in 60,317 Posts	Have you ever noticed that it's only people who are perfect that are murdered or die in horrific accidents? "He was the perfect husband" , "She was the perfect daughter." "A tragic accident they were the perfect family." "They died together, the perfect couple till the end." Makes me glad I abuse my kids and beat up my wife. Kind of makes them and I immortal __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

July 6th, 2018, 09:57 AM	#1424
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,117 Thanks: 449,715 Thanked 896,775 Times in 60,317 Posts	I think I may have a body odour problem My last two dates ended oddly, both women sprayed me with perfume before we had sex I can't quite place the brand but it had a distinct sharp peppery smell __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

July 6th, 2018, 01:46 PM	#1425
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	What's the cruelest thing to do to a one-armed Ethiopian hanging from a cliff ? , Offer him slice of watermelon . My daughter always dreamed of getting married when she was a little girl , So we converted to Islam. How do you know an Ethiopian is going to die ? , Their friends are crowding around with knives and forks . __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

July 7th, 2018, 09:45 AM	#1427
fatrat1 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2016 Posts: 2,708 Thanks: 52,473 Thanked 27,275 Times in 2,641 Posts	Woman goes into the doctors. Doctor! Doctor! I've been Graped. Don't you meant raped? Well yes, but there was a bunch of them. __________________ My Avatar is To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

July 7th, 2018, 05:40 PM	#1428
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	ball7 / fatrat1 in what passes for my mind I feel those were corny jokes !!.. I`ll let it slide though provided you both say a thousand "Hail Marys" while punching each other in the giblets ... Or ... Thank every post in this thread !! The Jew kid in my class handed in an absolutely fantastic essay about the Holocaust today , Was so good that gave him a gold star. A young Jew was knocked down (Backed over) and (Eventually) killed (Hey, nobody saw me) on the road near my house last night , His family have been out there all day , Drawing flowers on the lamp post. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

July 5th, 2018, 08:28 PM	#1422
Mister Fide Veteran Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: Nearly there Posts: 892 Thanks: 23,075 Thanked 17,986 Times in 890 Posts	Woman : I have just been raped by a madman Policeman : What makes you believe he was a madman? Woman : I had to show him what to do

July 5th, 2018, 08:37 PM	#1423
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,982 Times in 15,730 Posts	My first wife died of poisoned mushrooms, my second wife died of poisoned mushrooms, my third wife died of head injuries....she wouldn't eat the poisoned mushrooms.

July 6th, 2018, 07:44 PM	#1426
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,982 Times in 15,730 Posts	I was once asked to identify a burn victim It was my friend KFC

July 9th, 2018, 03:03 PM	#1429
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,559 Times in 69,067 Posts	My son is such a miserable cunt, I bought him a trampoline for his birthday , But all he wants to do is sit in his wheelchair and cry. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

July 10th, 2018, 09:04 AM	#1430
bp666 Vintage Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 1,073 Thanks: 77,520 Thanked 14,183 Times in 1,074 Posts	I heard on the news that the top Serbian tennis player was down in Salisbury poisoning people. What the farck Novichok, get back to Wimbledon and play tennis. Bloody foreigners!!

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