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#21 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Halfway between here and there!
Posts: 262
Thanks: 278
Thanked 1,816 Times in 263 Posts
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![]() Aardvaark walks into a bar. Barman says: 'Why the long face?'
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We don't grow up; we just grow old. |
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#22 |
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 72
Thanks: 1
Thanked 1,253 Times in 72 Posts
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![]() China will no longer publish a phone directory due to chaos...
there are so many Wing's and Wong's in THE DIRECTORY, people were always winging wong numbers. I felt you needed to know this... ************************************************** * |
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The Following 14 Users Say Thank You to daddynick For This Useful Post: |
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#23 |
Blocked!
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 221
Thanks: 487
Thanked 2,605 Times in 282 Posts
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![]() What does DNA stand for?
National Dyslexic Association. |
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#24 |
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 72
Thanks: 1
Thanked 1,253 Times in 72 Posts
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![]() At 85 years of age, Wally married Anne, a lovely 25 year old.
Since her new husband is so old, Anne decides that after their wedding she and Wally should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together. After the wedding festivities Anne prepares herself for bed and the expected 'knock' on the door. Sure enough the knock comes, the door opens and there is Wally, her 85 year old groom, ready for action. They unite as one. All goes well, Wally takes leave of his bride, and she prepares to go to sleep. After a few minutes, Anne hears another knock on her bedroom door, and it's Wally. Again he is ready for more 'action.' Somewhat surprised, Anne consents for more coupling. When the newlyweds are done, Wally kisses his bride, bids her a fond goodnight and leaves. She is set to go to sleep again, but, aha you guessed it..... Wally is back again, rapping on the door, and is as fresh as a 25-year-old, ready for more 'action.' And, once again they enjoy ! each other. But as Wally gets set to leave again, his young bride says to him, 'I am thoroughly impressed that at your age you can perform so well and so often. I have been with guys less than a third of your age who were only good once. You are truly a great lover, Wally.' Wally, somewhat embarrassed, turns to Anne and says: .......'You mean I was here already?' The moral of the story: Don't be afraid of getting old, senior moments have advantages |
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The Following 26 Users Say Thank You to daddynick For This Useful Post: |
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#25 |
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 72
Thanks: 1
Thanked 1,253 Times in 72 Posts
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![]() A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about the
birds and the bees. 'I don't want to know,' the child said, bursting into tears. 'Promise me you won't tell me.' Confused, the father asked what was wrong. The boy sobbed, 'When I was six, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech. At seven, I got the 'There's no Tooth Fairy' speech. When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no Santa' speech. If you're going to tell me that grown-ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for.' |
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The Following 24 Users Say Thank You to daddynick For This Useful Post: | ajitpd, AlBundy, chuff, effCup, eyetoy, fehmarn, Fuzzie, henry_fellows, hr2, junior366, keefriff, lavinius, leeroy, maddog37, memfa, mxyptlk, rewbear, rockernut, rodneymoone, sniggles, trailmaster, tygrkhat40, Up_n_Ready, wwade |
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#26 |
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 72
Thanks: 1
Thanked 1,253 Times in 72 Posts
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![]() A woman was standing in a crowded elevator of the hotel she was staying in. When a man got in and accidentally elbowed her in the breast.
The man said, "I'm sorry! But if your heart is as soft as your tit, you'll forgive me." So the woman replies, "If your dick is as hard as your elbow then I am staying in room 113." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to daddynick For This Useful Post: |
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#27 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Darblond
Posts: 144
Thanks: 285
Thanked 4,058 Times in 175 Posts
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You are a carbon based life form, get over it. |
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#28 |
Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 6
Thanks: 110
Thanked 37 Times in 5 Posts
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![]() What do rednecks do on Halloween?
Pump-Kin! ![]() |
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The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to gfong For This Useful Post: |
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#29 |
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 21
Thanks: 3
Thanked 823 Times in 27 Posts
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![]() 6 Truths of Life 1. You cannot touch all your teeth with your tongue. 2. All idiots, after reading the first truth, will try it. 3. And discover that The first truth is a lie. 4. You're smiling now because you're an idiot. 5. You soon will forward this to another idiot. 6. There's still a stupid smile on your face. I apologise about this. I'm an idiot and I needed company ... ![]() ![]() ![]()
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but wait there's more
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#30 |
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: On my couch
Posts: 63
Thanks: 647
Thanked 282 Times in 65 Posts
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![]() Two rednecks are playing golf behind two flamingly effeminate golfers who are just flitting about after every shot, every putt, everything.
The rednecks are getting so mad watching the unmacho behavior of the two at the "gentleman's game," so they decide they're going to hit into them to get off. The rednecks' shots are getting dangerously close to the two gays, and finally, a shot from one of the rednecks hits one of the gays on the head and it knocks him out cold. The other gay is in an angry panic, shaking his friend to get up, "Felipe! Felipe! Get up! Get up!" He shouts at the rednecks, "You bad men! We are going to sue you!" One of the rednecks yelled back, "You ain't gonna sue us! I'd just as soon suck your winney!" The gay heard that and started shaking his friend, "Felipe! Felipe! Get up! Hurry! They want to settle out of court!"
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National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood - NO MA'AM!!! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. |
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