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Old 09-09-2017, 12:30 AM   #1221
flembo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaxJoker View Post
You sure

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As certainly thank like one
I'm sure. I'm even 25% German,
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Old 09-09-2017, 12:47 AM   #1222
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Quote:
Originally Posted by @llatse@ View Post
I know you've already been told but anyone entering this thread is going to hell.........so when we're all burning together we'll know how it was in Aushwitz in the gas ovens.
I was going to hell anyway. I'm 25% German. So I had nothing to lose.
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Old 09-09-2017, 02:45 AM   #1223
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Q. What's the difference between Rick Santorum and ISIS?

A. ISIS wants to take the world back to the 7th century. Rick Santorum only wants to take us back to the 13th.
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Old 09-09-2017, 11:36 PM   #1224
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This is an observation more than a joke:

The Ku Klux Klan is a LARP group gone wrong. Their titles such as Exalted Cyclops, Grand Dragon, etc. sound like a cross between horror movies and Dungeons & Dragons. Actually, the KKK was D&D before their time! >

Tell me if you like this observation.
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Old 09-10-2017, 06:09 AM   #1225
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ISIS member gets run over by wife he raped for years:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AS9WawilvN0
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Old 09-10-2017, 10:48 AM   #1226
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They're going to have to rename the Virgin Islands, cos they've been well and truly fucked
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Old 09-10-2017, 12:17 PM   #1227
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Irma+Virgin Islands = Virgin oil
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Old 09-12-2017, 12:12 AM   #1228
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A transgender man with terminal cancer visits his doctor knowing he has only 9 months left to live.

"Doctor, all my life I've wondered what it would be like to be pregnant. Can you make my wish come true?" The doctor thinks for a while and then says, "Yes, given your condition I think I can make that happen" The patient is delighted and the operation is set for the following week.

As he comes round from the aneasthetic the first face he sees is the doctor's. "Will I now find out what it's like to be pregnant?" The Doctor smiled and said, "You should do, I've sewn your arse up."
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Old 09-15-2017, 02:24 PM   #1229
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It's quiz night at the pub, and one team is a man short to enter. There's a guy at the bar on his own, so they decide to ask him of he wants to join them.

After introductions talk turns to work and it turns out the new guy is on the bins.

Then the quiz starts and the new guy is a revelation, art, science, literature, history, this guy knows the answer to most of the questions. They end up winning the quiz, and having split the prize money, they get chatting again as they celebrate.

"With all that knowledge you must be able to get a better job than binman"
"Well I used to be a gynacologist, but I gave it up."
"Why?"
"I wanted to do something less disgusting."
"What! So you chose garbage over being a doctor?"
"Think about it, most of my patients were either old or infected, often both."
"But still, it can't have been that bad."
"You ever pulled open a grilled cheese sandwich?"
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Old 09-15-2017, 06:02 PM   #1230
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Since this is getting to be a little more gynecological:

Q. What's grosser than gross?

A. A Bloody Mary with a string attached.
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